Mask of Celibacy

Chapter 11

My quest for freedom began in senior year after I'd trapped myself in a downward spiral of overwork. Taking eight classes shouldn't have been possible with only seven periods a day. But I managed it by splitting my time equally between Spanish and French.

Yes, because I'm really that mental.

Well, the crazy idea didn't come from me alone. St. Stephen's had planned Spanish IV and French IV at the exact same time. Care ended up dropping French, which was the smart thing to do, but I didn't want to stop either language. 

That meant I'd either have to split myself in half—not really a viable option—or attend class every other day. So I chose the latter.

Instead of school taking up a lot of my time, it consumed my whole life. Every night I stayed up until midnight completing all my assignments: another project, a huge paper, an essay, or exam prep. Somehow I managed to squeeze in college applications, taking my placement exams, and writing motivation letters.

That all happened in addition to several extracurricular activities. And church, of course, because God forbid I neglected my spiritual duties.

Most weekends I spent in the library finishing up projects because Grandad remained too damned stubborn to let me use the Internet. When I asked him to take me to the library again right after church, he exploded like a malfunctioning rocket.

"Jess Maria Sophia!" roared Grandad. "When the hell did you find out about this project?"

"A month ago," I said in a small voice, casting my glance aside.

"Why did you wait until now to start?"

"Did you miss the part where I've been up day and night?" I asked, my tone laced with sarcasm.

"This has gone too far!" He slammed his hand down on the dining room table. "You need to organize yourself better or drop a damn class."

"We don't get any newspapers or magazines, and I need articles for Political Science."

"We don't have money for subscriptions."

"Then give me access to the Internet."

"Not this again!"

Tilting my head back, I exhaled a slow breath. "Look, Grandad. I know you're still mad at me because some boy gave me his email address, but that was a long time ago."

He huffed like an angry dragon.

"It's not like I was going out with him," I insisted. "Are you going to hold it against me until I'm thirty?"

"Maybe."

"The Web would make my research so much easier," I insisted. "It's not about flirting with guys. It's about finding all these magazines, newspapers, and everything in one place."

"Jeeeeess—"

"Ask Care's grandparents." I gestured towards their house. "They let her use it."

"Because she's responsible."

"And I'm not?" I cried. "Come on, I don't have time to flirt with guys. I barely have time to sleep."

"I think you should cancel one of your classes," he muttered. "You're pushing yourself too much. Yesterday you and Carm stayed up until two in the morning. It's too hard on her."

"I didn't ask her to stay up."

"You know her."

"If anything, it proves that using the Web would make my life easier."