The Irrefutable Flame⎪✓

❨19❩

♀︎

Heated streams of the sun awaken me and my eyes flutter open, the unfamiliar bedroom makes every single painful memory from last night reoccur. Elijah was raw and completely broken when he spoke those words, the words that have haunted him for the past couple of years. Tilly isn't here anymore and the mere thought of that makes my heart constrict in pain, she must've been so awfully scared and helpless. 

The heavy arm on my waist leads to the sight of a peaceful Elijah, his long eyelashes are caressing his cheeks and his slightly open mouth makes me smile. A content sigh leaves my lips and my finger runs over his hand on my stomach, the simple action wakes him up and he pulls me closer before hiding his head in the crook of my neck. 

"Good morning, Lij," I smile. 

He hums and leaves a simple kiss on my neck, "Good morning, love."

"I want to bring you somewhere today, will you come?" I ask and hope for a positive answer. Both of us were destroyed emotionally after last night and this will help us bring out the good again, hell knows we need it.

He smiles up at me and nods his head, "You've got me intrigued."

"Don't get your hopes up, babe. It's not anything special," His face freezes and I realize what I just said. "Damn, well, I kind of just slipped there."

"Babe," He rolls the word on his tongue and smirks at me suddenly. "Once again you have me intrigued, my love. Let me get ready."

And that we do. Both of us getting ready and him lending me a long shirt of his own, the sight isn't too great but it'll have to do. Before I know it we're leaving for his car and I give him directions to the one spot here in Hetdale that I know the two of us have incredibly fond memories from.

He parks the car in front of the lake and smiles at me, the pure happiness radiating off his expression warms my heart and I unexpectedly grab his cheeks and leave a simple kiss on his lips. His hand tangles in my hair and he deepens the advance, only letting go when we crave oxygen again.

My heart flutters when we step out of the vehicle and he intertwines our fingers, the action so natural and gentle it provokes jitters. He walks us down to the end of the lake and I see the bench that brings memories back from our time in high school.

"You do know that the principal will hate our assignment, right?" I ask Elijah with a small laugh. He shrugs indifferently and smirks at me, the sight enough to make me breathless.

"He will enjoy it, don't worry too much, love," As careless as always. "So, what did you really bring me out here for?"

"It's a nice place to think."

"To think about what?"

"I don't know," I state in a lie. "The future."

Elijah frowns slightly at me and tilts his head, "What is it about the future that has you so concerned?"

"I'm leaving for college," Stating the truth does hurt my heart, but the two of us need to have this conversation. "It will complicate things, you know?"

"Not if we don't allow it to," He explains. "But I understand where you're coming from and it doesn't have to interfere with what we have right at this very moment."

"I have to say it and both of us need to be in an agreement, Lij," The desperation is clear on my voice and I hate how obvious it is. I don't want to end things with him, fuck no, but having him here in Hetdale and having me away for college will mess with my emotions and I can't have that on top of everything else. "We can't keep it up and I have to say it, I need to tell you."

"Don't say it, love."

"Why not?" I whisper and grab his cold hand, clutching it in my own.

"Because I know what you mean and I can't handle hearing those words fall from your lips," The honesty shocks me slightly and he squeezes my hand, his intense stare holding my gaze. "We agree on this, can we leave it at that?"

Nodding my head, I decide to accept what he insinuates for now. With my dad fighting for his life and my mom slapping me I don't need this either, none of us need any of this shit, but having a long distance relationship will be the end of me and my college career. It will force me to visit Hetdale and therefore visit my mother and I don't want that. College isn't really my cup of tea, but it will offer me an excuse to move away from her as fast as possible.

Even if that means burning Elijah in the process, the one guy I've found myself fawning over and truly enjoying the company of. Hopefully, he can forgive me for this, if we ever meet after high school again.

A squeeze on my hand brings me out of my trance and Elijah helps me down onto the familiar bench. I look at the more mature version of him right next to me, the one with a five o'clock shadow, the one with scars that run as deeply as mine, the one that has worked hard for everything he has. The one who has touched me in more ways than I could ever count. He was the boy I fell for in high school, the guy I slept with and loved in college, and now he is the man I find myself needing and yearning for. This man right here is the only one that has ever occupied my mind, he is the only one my body craves.

"This is a nice place to think," He states and I smile at him remembering my words from back then. His green eyes fall upon me and my heart sings for him, "What are you thinking about, love?"

"The future," I say with a smile and cuddle into his side, he drapes his strong arm around me and I relax in his hold. "Only this time, I see a lot of you in it and I don't feel like giving up on that."

"Yeah," He smiles and the sight makes my heart pound in my chest. I'm in too deep and that thought doesn't scare me anymore, it makes me fucking ecstatic. "I see a lot of us in our future as well."