Shut Up, Padfoot!

45

"You wouldn't make it in the muggle world, girl," I teased.

Iris rolled her eyes and kicked her feet up on the coffee table as if to make a statement. Like she's Miss Tough. I scoffed and smiled at her act.

"No magic? I think I can live with that," she bragged.

"The world's a lot harder without magic. Got a spell for everything out here," I replied.

She laughed, saying, "Like tarantallegra."

I snorted at the sudden spell being said and reminisced on the time I actually used it. Good memory. Bad detention.

"Definitely need that one in the muggle world," I giggled.

She wiped her eye as she continued laughing. My smile grew larger. I like that she's in our common room and feeling more at home. Iris has gotten much more comfortable around all of us and I think she's a good one. Think I'll keep her.

"Would you bugger off?"

I jumped at the loud voice and Iris turned her head. I crushed the end of my cigarette in the ashtray on the table and turned as well. We peered behind the couch to catch the reason for the irritated tone.

James stopped walking and whirled around to glare at Sirius. My interest piqued higher and I stood from the cushions. It's not like them to argue in public. As Marauders, we like to keep up a reputation. We don't like others seeing the conflict and how bad it can get between our friendships.

I wiped my hand down my pants and slowly walked around the side of the couch to watch what was going on. I don't know if the argument will end quickly or not.

"I'm worried about you, mate! I can't be worried?" Padfoot defended.

"Merlin's pants.. I'm not 12 anymore. Stop coddling me," Prongs yelled.

"Oi, oi.. boys, people are watching," I warned.

They ignored me. Remus and Wormtail came down the stairs in a hurry. Probably were witnessing the argument begin upstairs before being relocated.

Sirius returned the sharp gaze back at him, his fists held at his sides. The tension in the once peaceful common room rose and it suddenly felt warm in here.

"You don't ever tell us what the hell is going on. We can see it on you. We can see how bad it's getting but you won't tell us shit," Sirius stated.

"Because I can handle it by myself!" Prongs shout.

I flinched at the deafening voice again. I hate yelling. Taking a step forwards, I decided that we need to move this. Too many people are watching. They're all whispering and I know they're creating millions of false rumors in seconds.

Inserting myself closer to their vicinity, I took a breath in to calm myself and start speaking. Yeah, it's best to let them get it all out but when others can take everything that's going on to their advantage, to use it against them in the future, now is not the time.

"Quit it. Just breathe for a bit and we can talk about it upstairs," I calmly interjected.

"Fawkes, can't I handle it myself?" James asked, forcibly to get me to agree with him.

"Yeah, yeah, of course. We just want to be more open about things though," I added quickly.

He frowned, running a hand over his mouth in stress. A bead of sweat fell down his temple and he paled more. Honestly, he's not looking good. Maybe this is something we should go over again. In detail.

"God, you always take his side. It's because you're sleeping with him," he murmured.

"What? The hell is wrong with you, man?" Sirius exclaimed.

"Uhm, uncalled for. But it doesn't mean I'm biased. I'm trying to see this in your shoes too, James," I said.

Prongs turned around, hands on his hips. Restlessly, he walked a bit. He paced the small ground around him. I could hear his breathing and I know he was trying to control himself. Or he's just thinking.

"Fawkes, what the hell?" Padfoot said to me helplessly.

I glanced at him and I put my hand on his arm. He brought it up and clasped his hand on my outstretched arm as well. He wouldn't look at me but he's just as stressed.

Suddenly, the chair near James cluttered hard to the floor.

I startled and instinctively Sirius pulled me closer to him. My eyes traveled from the strewn chair to a heaving James. Students inched away and yelled with slight danger crawling their spines.

This time, Prongs pushed all the things off the study table. They all clattered and some decorations shattered to pieces. He cried out and the frustration was clear.

Sirius let go of me and dove towards the eye of the storm.

He grasped James' biceps and pulled him away from the objects. He brought him back and faced him. Obviously, having argued with him just a couple of seconds ago, he's not going to like that.

"Get off me, dickhead."

He brought his fist up and pounded Padfoot's face. Sirius stumbled backward at the blow and cradled his cheek. Blood trickled down his mouth and I stared in horror. What the hell is going on?

Recovering from the punch, he stood properly. In his fit of rage, he pulled his arm back and it slung when he let it loose. His knuckles made contact with James' eye.

The latter doubled backward as he groaned in pain. He held it similarly to the other boy. His feet couldn't stay still as they dragged back and forth on the ground. Sirius shook out his hand.

As if I was in a trance, I pulled myself out of it and entered.

My nails dug into his skin when I tried clutching Sirius away from him. Remus helped me and took his shoulder. When they were separated, my brows furrowed and I made eye contact with him.

"Back off, okay? Just back off," I ordered.

His grey eyes circled in whirlpools and I could still see the anger. I pushed at his stomach gently and he stepped back again. He broke our eye contact and he wiped at his mouth, head turned.

He'll be okay. Doesn't know how to protect someone in the way they need and ends up hurting the ones he loves. Always been like that since day one.

He's a pretty thing that destroys everything he touches.

He works on it hard so it doesn't end up like that. But everything is still a work in progress. Gets scared when he can't help someone and he ends up hurting them.

I pulled Prongs up, tearing my lingering stare from Sirius to tend to the one in front of me. James had tears falling down his face, not from the physical pain, but the mental one.

Softly, I held his face in my hand. I turned his head to look at me and lowered mine to make sure he was looking into my eyes.

"It's going to be fine. I said I was going to find a way to get rid of the nightmares. You've got to trust me on this one," I reassured.

"You can't fix this, Fawkes. They're going to stay even after you die."

My heart shattered and I hate that he said it like it was a matter of fact. And maybe it is. Maybe it is a fact. But I can still try.

"No, it won't. C'mere."

I tugged him close to me and he engulfed my frame. He held me close and I can feel his ribs along my fingertips. He sobbed into my shoulder.

From the corner of my eye, Sirius ran a finger under his lashline and held his cigarette out for Remus to light.

-lana