Of the Twisted and the Lost

Chapter 41:

"So you're sure that the murderer will be here tonight?" Sam hisses, ducking behind the garbage chute. "Because if he doesn't come, I swear to God, I'm going to kill you." 

"I'm ninety-nine percent sure," Junjie replies confidently, as he calmly ties a rope around his waist. 

"What about the rest of the one percent?" his partner grumbles, wrinkling his nose at the revolting scent of trash. "And this plan of yours? Absolutely. Terrible." 

"Of course it's terrible," Junjie shoots back just as smoothly. "It's a plan made by me, so naturally it's a bloody horrible plan." 

"I thought you were good at everything." 

"Solving murders and making good observations, yes. Finding key evidence? Absolutely. But making plans? I'm rubbish at it, at least, according to my brother and a few others." 

"You have a brother?" Sam stares in disbelief. "Jesus, is he like you? A freak?" 

Junjie considers the question. "Well, yes," he admits. "Yes, he is. More so than I am." 

Sam blinks, before turning his gaze back to the middle of the dumpster. "How'd you know we had to come here?" 

"Easy," Junjie says. "I looked at all the coordinates of where the two murders were being held, and they were two numbers away." 

"But there's no one here," grouches Sam. "There's no human to murder. Who would they murder? Oh, look at that! It's a small little birdie, struggling under all that trash. Oh-ho, it's time for the murderer to come out, holding a blue whatever weapon and smash and slash at the innocent little creature." 

Junjie ignores his partner's sarcasm. 

"God, this is wasting our time," Sam says loudly. "Why don't we just wait until—" 

"Wait until what?" Junjie spits back, prowling towards Sam. "Wait until one more person is dead? And then what? Investigate?" 

"Chill, dude. That's not what I meant. Besides, isn't that what you're like? You don't care if anyone's murdered when you go to the crime scene. All you want is to find out what happens when you don't even legit care about who dies." 

That's when Junjie notices something strange, as he studies Sam for a second. 

Pure, absolute fear in those dark, brown eyes. 

Nightmares, Junjie thinks, noting the familiar dark circles. Sam's been having nightmares. 

"You're not the only one who loses sleep," rasps Sam. "I think about her too." 

"You don't." Junjie shakes his head firmly. "All you ever were was cruel to Sera. You didn't regret anything." 

Sam looks away. "Of course I regret it." 

Those words are so soft, Junjie strains to hear them. 

But they're there. 

"I didn't know this would happen," Sam says slowly. 

And just like that, a world of colors comes crashing down on them both: of violet pain and taro-colored sadness and midnight purple, the color of loss. 

You're not the only one who lost something when she was gone. Cami's voice comes back to him. You didn't lose your best friend. Maybe you lost your soulmate or your true love or whatever, but you didn't lose your best friend. 

The words come back to him, pummeling and furious, like a tsunami waiting to arise. Waiting to destroy. Waiting for him to fall on his knees. 

"You lost something," Junjie realizes, voice hoarse. "When she was gone." 

Sam's eyes flicker to the sky, the washy colors of purple and pink and sunrise beginning to settle into husky midnight, and that's all the confirmation Junjie needs. 

"What was it?" he pushes. 

Sam gives him a rueful smile. "My sister," he whispers. 

Junjie looks down, suddenly feeling guilt needle away at his stomach. All he had thought was of how Sera affected him instead of how Sera affected the other world. 

"I'm sorry," Junjie says quietly. 

Sam furiously wipes at his eyes. "You know, when my mom told me she was marrying Sera's dad, I was angry. My dad died, leaving my mom single — and I wanted to keep her single, so she could love me forever. But instead, she found someone. Someone better than me, named Chen." 

"Even if you hated Chen, you didn't have to take it out on Sera." 

"Yeah, but the thing is, at school. . . it's like I wasn't there. I felt powerful, whenever Sera cried, which she rarely did. She was kinda stupid, trying to stand up to the other kids, but I admired and hated her for it. You know? I always thought that me and my mom were going to be together, until another family ripped us apart." 

The words keep spilling, faster and faster, like a water fountain that's about to crack. 

"I was legit like, 'My God, Sera can't be my new stepsister' but it was true. And you want to know the worst part?" 

Junjie nods. 

"The worst part is that she always pitied me," Sam chokes out. "Just thought I bullied her because I was too weak to not be a bully. Sera was a better sibling than I ever could be. I'm not saying I automatically like her and everything will be sunshine and rainbows. I just. . . now that she's gone, you know?" 

"You never learn to appreciate things until they're gone," Junjie says hollowly. 

I know, Sam. I feel you. 

"I always thought that Sera was so brave," Sam continues. "With that stupid smile of hers always on her face. Even though her life isn't that easy. I mean, I definitely didn't make things better." 

"We all learn from our mistakes," says Junjie. "I know I did. You can't really change the past because that's set in stone. But you can change the person you want to be." 

Sam stares at him in wonder. "Wow, who knew you were so good at this you can change yourself bull-crap?" 

Before Junjie has time to retort, a scream suddenly arises — a blood-curdling scream that causes his heart to pound faster than before.