If Only She'd Loved Him

Chapter 21

Friday 2:00 pm

Erik stayed upstairs for a long time, thinking to himself. When he'd made up his mind about what he wanted to say, he went down to talk to Megan.  As he knocked on the door, he was half surprised to find her still there, though he had been listening for her footsteps since he placed her on her bed.

"I thought you might have tried to leave me," he said.

Huddled on the edge of the bed, Megan looked up at him. Her eyes were tired. Her arms ached.   "I gave you my word, Erik."  She spoke very gently.  "But, maybe now that things have changed a little we could talk some more. I'd like to talk to you."

Erik sat down on the bed next to her. Face full of eagerness, hands folded safely in his lap, he leaned towards her. "I'd like that. I'd like that a lot."

"Good." she tried to pull herself closer, balancing on her forearms, but her hands refused to take her weight. He helped her support herself, then slid her back towards the headboard so she could sit upright.

"Thank you."

"My pleasure, sweetheart," he replied with a tender smile.

Megan didn't smile back. Her face was determined as she looked at him. "Erik, don't you think that under the circumstances, you could let me go?" His face hardened before her eyes, but still she pressed on. "You owe me your life, surely that has to be worth something."

"My life? Ha. Without you I have no life. Ask me anything else, and it's yours. Anything. But don't ask me that," he pleaded. "Please don't ask me that." His eyes poured into her face, searching.

Megan shook her head. "But that's all I want." She reached out her hands, grasping his shoulders as she begged him. "Please, I want to go back to school. I want to go back home. Please, just let me go."

Firmly, he disentangled her hands from his body and placed them back on the bed. He shook his head. "You're asking for the one thing I can't give you," he said sadly. "I love you. I can't let you go. Don't you understand that? I need you, Megan. I want you, and I need you, and I'll have you. You haunt my soul. Don't you see? You haunt my soul."

Tears slid down her cheeks as she placed her hands on his face. His eyes, raw and in pain, locked onto hers. Slipping her hands down his cheek, she paused, holding still. His right hand reached up and savagely pulled her fingers to his lips. With her captured hand, he pressed down on his mouth, closing his eyes and breathing her in deep. Slowly he sucked on the tips of her fingers one by one. Megan ran her hand down his neck, gently stroking the bone below his chin. He reached up and pinioned her hand on his chest.

"Feel my heart. It's beating because of you. Love me, Megan. Love me. Please just love me, like I love you." Frantically, Erik looked into her face certain he'd see the love he felt reflected in her eyes, but all he saw was pity. His hands jerked down. His voice changed. "You will love me."

She paused, confused. "I don't understand."

"I'll make you love me."

"Please, Erik, stop."

"Why? Do you want me to wait till you fall in love with me too? I can tell by your eyes I won't live that long."

Megan looked into his eyes praying for some sign of sanity, some hope that he wouldn't do what his face said he would. She found none. Desperate, she darted into her jeans pocket and pulled out the old razor from the bathroom upstairs. He howled as he let go of her. Instantly, she was off the bed and running out of the bedroom. This time she made it to the front door before Erik did. This time the chain was still unlocked from when she'd tried to escape before. The instant after she saw Erik clutching his arm in her bedroom doorway, she got the door open and ran towards the woods.

"Oh God, please help me! Somebody! Anybody help me!"

Her feet wore only red socks, but they pounded the ground as she ran. The Fall air nipped into her chest. She shivered in its wind, hugging her shirt close to her skin, but her mind had only one thought and that was—run.