One night with a billionaire

36. L U C Y

Lost. I felt lost. Something was missing and I couldn't pinpoint exactly what it was. How does somebody physically feel lonely without understanding why? My head was in a daze, thumping slowly but painfully in line with the beeping shooting through my ears. Where was that even coming from?

I tried to answer my question by lifting my eyelids away from each other, but the headache I was suffering decided to travel south. I squeezed and managed to break the seal, only to be attacked by a bright white light. If I thought I had a headache before, then this was definitely a migraine; the thumping increased and my eyes burned like a ball of fire. I'm sure I faintly heard myself groan, scraping against my dry throat.

I began to get frustrated. I could hear faint voices, people talking, chatting outside. Yet I still couldn't place where I was.

As I twisted my neck to the side, trying to gain focus of what was in front of me, I noticed the bright light dimming; the intense blur and agony dissipated as the room became clear. White walls, white floors, a small window with broken plastic blinds. I panicked. This wasn't my bedroom. My bedroom had ochre wallpaper and smelt like fresh daisies, where as the scent in here reminded me of something else. A bit like hand gel, strong and intense. But my confused head wouldn't work, I couldn't state exactly what it was.

I jolted upright in fear, and felt a sharp pain swim from my left abdomen to my right. Or shall I say shoot, not swim. It came fast and hard, enough to make me tense and grab my side. "Ow". I cried out louder than intended, or expected from how dry my throat was, noticing the small needle taped to the back of my hand. I slowly averted my gaze to the drip attached, following upwards until I also noticed the machine beeping beside me too. So that's where that beeping came from.

My head, confused or not, became a little bit more clear about my surroundings. I was in a hospital. But I still couldn't understand why I felt so lost and lonely. What was I missing? What had happened to me?

I knew I could press the big round button behind me, alert somebody that I was awake, and simply ask. But my body kinda froze. The fear escalated and I wasn't sure I wanted to know what happened. Especially when I couldn't remember anything apart from my name. And maybe the colour of my bedroom, but that was still a little hazy now that I thought about it again.

I took deep breaths, calming my insides. Only I wasn't prepared for the almighty intrusion as a blonde nurse barged in without even looking up to see I was awake. She had a clipboard in hand, writing something. My body became a statue as I waited impatiently for her to look up and notice that her patient was in fact awake, confused, and lost.

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B A X

She's awake. My girl is awake. She's about to meet our baby. Our baby is going to meet her mother.

I'd been sat in the car for twenty minutes after reverse parking into an empty bay and for some reason not been able to move. Angels little snores filled the car with more hope and happiness than I imagined, but I was terrified. How did I introduce them? What did I say? I'd been waiting days for this moment to happen, to see those beautiful brown eyes look back at me with love and, most of all, life. I wanted to see her face when she saw our daughter and held her.

"Come on Angel, we're about to meet mommy."

She stirred in her sleep, a little noise escaping. She liked the sound of meeting her mommy and so did I.

As soon as we reached the ward I knew something was wrong. It didn't feel right. I had an uneasy feeling settle in my stomach and a slight panic washed over me.

"Mr Baxter." The friendly nurse approached me. "May we talk in here with Doctor Chow please."

I hadn't heard of those doctor, maybe she was on tonight's shift. Nevertheless, I complied and followed.

"Mr Baxter, take a seat please." Dr Chow was a blonde female, and I knew from her forced smile that something was definitely not right.

"What's happened? I thought Lucy was awake?"

They both exchanged a look of awkwardness before Dr Chow started speaking again.

"Miss Partridge seems to be confused. She doesn't seem to remember anything, including the fact she was pregnant."

My heart leaped into my stomach, a whirl of nausea making my head spin in the process. I'd gently placed Angel on the floor, as my hands started to shake.

"What do you mean?"

"It could be because she's just woke up, it could literally be nothing, but we wanted to warn you before you go in there."

My mind was racing in circles. What if she didn't remember me? What if she didn't remember anything of her pregnancy? What if she rejected Angel? My chest became tense and I sucked in deep breaths as I tried to comprehend what was happening.

"Mr Baxter, I know this is extremely stressful for you but we need you to be strong for her and the baby. It may be that she remembers as soon as you enter the room."

She was right. But that didn't stop me from having a panic attack. Angel had become my world since the day she was born, and it broke me that there was a possibility of Lucy not remembering her. She had to. I was terrified she wouldn't look at us with the same love she did before. It was like my heart had seized and cracked into tiny pieces, my chest tight and aching.

"I'm fine." I responded, and hastily got up with Angel to take her into her mom. She had to remember, she just had to.

I left without a second thought. They were both calling me to come back but I didn't want to. I couldn't wait. I had to see with my own eyes.

I stormed down the narrow hallways, shuffling past the different nurses and patients until I reached her room. There was no noise coming from inside. I reached for the handle, pushed open and stopped as my eyes locked on the most beautiful pair of brown irises.

She was lay awake, panic laced through her features, tired eyes puffy and red, but beautiful. She looked just as beautiful as she always did.

It was then I knew I wanted to marry her. I wanted to call her my wife. Make more babies with her, and care for her for the rest of our lives. I imagined for a second her walking towards me dressed all beautiful, about to say 'I do'.

When I pushed my thoughts aside, and focused on the present, I noticed she was still panicked. Her eyes were frantically searching me and Angel.

"Lucy?"

"I know you."

Oh no. Why did she say it like that?

"Course you do, it's me." I stepped closer.

"I know something, but I can't put my finger on it."

Tears began falling, drowning her face.

"Baby, don't cry. I have someone to meet you." I cradled Angel to my chest, and watched as more sobs left her. This wasn't happening, this was a nightmare. It had to be.

Holding her tummy she said, "My mind can't remember things, I'm scared."

And that's when I knew my life had turned upside down.