Chapter 32

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Zayn Evans

"Don't worry, everything will be alright. I'm there for you." "Those words sounded more beautiful than anything. I've been yearning to hear those words all my life and hearing it from Aurora thawed my frozen heart. I feel this anonymous feeling creeping into me which was loved by my heart.  My head screams that it was wrong but I love the feeling. Am I making a mistake?


Joe flashed in my mind in a loop. His smile is still vivid in my memory as well as him being in a coffin. I was too young to realise what did that to him as only one thought was there in my mind; He's dead. My Joe's dead. I lost him forever. What if I end up like him? 

Will she leave me in the end? Or will I be toxic to her? What if I don't give her the love she deserves? What if I am not good enough for her? What if she falls out of love? How can I even make her happy when I'm still struggling with my past? No. I should not do this. I need to stop before it consumes me completely. It's toxic for both of us. I should stop this though I'll be hurt. Though it will kill me in the process.




I took my hand off of her hold harshly, making her flinch because of my sudden outburst. She looked at me perplexed, not being able to comprehend my actions. I'm sorry, Aurora. I know that I am gonna regret this till my death, but I've got no choice. 




"I shouldn't have said that. Telling someone more than they deserve to know is daft and stupid. I don't want you to pity me," I said in a cold tone, making her face twitch painfully from my words. I knew I was breaking her but ending this now would be better than to do it after things go out of hands.



"I'm just trying to help, Zayn. And I- I don't pity you, I'm trying to comfort you. And why don't I deserve to know? I know you like me. Why are you hiding it then? Some things are meant to be let out," she said in a low voice, trying to convince me. I've never seen her being so calm and convincing like this. She was trying. Trying to make us work but our destiny had other plans. 



"What? You really think that I like you? Do you remember when I tried to help and you lashed out on me rudely, saying that I know nothing about you? Well, now I can tell you the same thing. You know nothing about me and please, I don't like you," I said with a mocking laugh. Those words were nothing but rubbish. I didn't mean any of it and if I was harsh with her, she'd hate me and move on and find a prince charming she deserves, not some arrogant arsehole with a past like me. She deserves better than me. 


"That was before we knew each other and I'm sorry for hurting you. Now we know each other well. We had a lot of fun together. I mean it's not the same. It's definitely not the same, Zayn," she said, her voice breaking. She's trying to stay strong but I was brutally breaking her with my fucking words. 


"Well, if you didn't understand yet, let me be clearer. I did everything only to avenge you. No one ever dared to speak to Zayn Evans like you did and you bruised my ego long ago so here's your punishment. You are nothing but a piece of trash in my life."



I paused for a second and stood up from my chair abruptly and turned around to wipe the tears which were brimming in the corner of my eyes. I was hurt. It pained me like I was dying gradually. I couldn't dare to look at her like this. She was crying and it was because of me.



I turned back towards her with a straight face and said, "You don't mean anything to me as you claim to be. Everything was just fake and I made it look real and it seems like you've fallen in my trap more easily than I imagined. You acted at first that you wouldn't fall for my charms and look at you now? I owed to myself to make you fall for me and prove that you are just the same like others and I did. Well, there's no one in this world who wouldn't fall for my charms. Glad I got my revenge. Goodbye, Ms. Wilson."

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