inevitable - draco malfoy

chapter forty two

It was a Saturday and Tracey invited me to go to Hogsmeade with her as Draco said he'd be busy in the room of requirement all day. I suspected that she felt guilty about what happened the previous year and wanted to make up for it and it wasn't like I was busy or had anything better to do.

Draco had been strange and quiet all morning and barely even looked at me however this wasn't necessarily out of the ordinary as I was becoming accustomed to his mood swings.

"I'm going to meet Tracey now." I announced to Draco as he sat at the foot of the bed staring at the wall. He gave me a small nod but didn't speak or look up at me. "I love you." I mumbled, bending down and gently kissing his cheek but I still gained no reaction from him.

It was the beginning of December and so we were both wrapped up in large winter coats, scarves and gloves as we made our way through the snowy paths to the Hogs Head as the Three Broomsticks was typically riddled with Gryffindors.

"What are your plans for Christmas?" Tracey asked me as we entered the small pub and took a seat next to the fireplace.

"I'll probably be staying with Draco." I smiled. "You?"

"I wish." Tracey rolled her eyes scoffing slightly. "Mother is taking us to Canada this year. Luckily I'm going to Blaise's for new year's though."

It was an odd feeling hanging out with Tracey again. The old giddy feeling I had when I was around her was now gone as my energy was constantly running on low.

An hour or so passed and things were lightening up after we'd had a few butterbeers.

"So, are you excited for the Slytherin Christmas party?" Tracey asked with a smirk.

"I completely forgot." I responded. "I doubt Draco will want to go." I said thoughtlessly, quickly regretting my words.

"Why not?" She questioned me further.

"I don't know he just- he's just been stressed about... schoolwork." I mumbled. I wanted to open about how I was feeling to someone other than Draco, but I knew I simply could not.

"Yeah I heard he was falling behind." Tracey continued. "Have you guys been arguing?"

"No- well, kind of." I tried to find the right words, but it was impossible.

"You can tell me if there's something going on, Amelia." Tracey said honestly. "I know we haven't spoken as much these past few months but the last thing I would want is for you to feel alone."

"I'm not alone – I just sometimes feel like I'm always thinking about how he feels and forgetting about how I feel." I muttered, not looking Tracey in the eye and instead looking out the frosted window behind her.

"You should always be able to talk about your feelings. When Blaise..." Tracey continued but I quickly zoned out when I noticed an unmissable head of platinum blonde hair walk in to the Three Broomsticks across from us. I furrowed my eyebrows, confused. Surely it wasn't Draco, he had no reason to lie to me.

"Amelia?" Tracey snapped me out of my thoughts. The windows were foggy, and I could barely make out who it was, so I decided against accusing Draco later on.

We made our way back up to the castle at around 3pm and I headed straight to the dorm room to get a couple assignments done before dinner as I knew it would hurt Draco if he knew Tracey had been talking about him falling behind in classes.

Draco's POV

My heart was racing as I made my way back up to my room. I already regretted my actions from today and my mind was riddled with guilt after lying to Amelia.

My breathing was heavy as I entered the dorm room to see Amelia sat deep in an essay. I headed straight for the bed and sat myself down on the edge.

"Is everything okay?" Amelia asked in a small and sweet voice, clearly concerned as per usual.

"Y-yeah, yes. Everything's fine." I responded, my eyes wide as she furrowed her eyebrows and made her way over to me. Amelia sat down next to me and connected her warm hand with my cold one. "How was your day?" I attempted to change the subject.

"Fine." She replied. "Well, a bit odd really. How was yours?"

"Fine." I sighed, lying through my teeth. Amelia looked up at me with wide eyes and my heart hurt. I wanted to give her everything she ever dreamed of, but I knew I wasn't capable. Without her I'd be numb, she was the only warmth I had felt in a long time and I knew I didn't deserve her. "I just missed you." I admitted. I watched as her green eyes lit up with happiness at my words which made me melt.

"Really?" She whispered attempting to hide her smile as I nodded. "I missed you too."

I brought my hand up to her cheek and caressed it gently as she continued to look up at me. We maneuvered so that I was laying on my back on top of the duvet as her head rested on my chest.

"I love you, Amelia." I breathed out. I wanted to tell her everything. I wanted to tell her how worthless I felt, how way in over my head I felt, how she was the only thing that gave me any glint of happiness. But I couldn't, I felt sick to my stomach and I feared I would lose her if I told her what I did today.

"I love you too, Draco." Amelia replied and I could hear her happiness in her voice however this only made me feel worse. I should be reminding her every chance I get of how much I love her and yet it felt near impossible.

When I was first given the task from the Dark Lord, I was terrified. However, I thought I had been given it for a reason – me of all people, he must have had some sort of faith in me. Yet I quickly realized I had no idea what I was doing. I thought using the necklace would keep me anonymous and I wouldn't have to leave Hogwarts and drag Amelia out with me but instead it's just caused more suspicion as I'd accidentally hexed Katie Bell instead of Dumbledore.

Amelia's POV

I could tell something was up with Draco, however didn't want to ruin this moment as I lay silently in his arms, tracing my fingertips on the thin material of his dark black shirt. I could hear his heartbeat as my head lay on his chest and I never wanted time to move as I felt safe and content.

Moments like this were growing more and more rare as Draco had been a million miles away the past few weeks. We lay like this every night however I felt as though the only reason he did so was to stop me from having nightmares and so this time it felt special.

"We better head down for dinner." Draco mumbled before kissing the top of my head. My heart sank slightly as I didn't want to move but complied anyways as I knew we couldn't stay like this forever.

He took my hand as we quietly but peacefully walked to the great hall and made our way over to the Slytherin table. Draco sat down with Blaise on his left as I joined him on his right, Tracey in front of us.

"You excited for the next Quidditch game?" I sparked conversation with Tracey and Blaise, not too hungry.

"Of course." Tracey smirked.

"Practice starts next week." Blaise responded. "I've been having dreams about it."

Draco took my hand under the table as the conversation continued. I yearned to know what was up with him as he was acting like a sad and lost puppy but knew asking might spark an argument I didn't want.

"Did you guys hear about Katie Bell?" Blaise questioned us as I furrowed my eyes.

"No?" I responded.

"She got hexed like – right in front of Potter. Suspicious if you ask me. It happened not long after we left the Hogs Head." Tracey explained.

"Wait – she got hexed?" I questioned further.

"Yeah by some weird cursed necklace, no one really knows what happened." Blaise finished. My heart dropped at that sentence and I quickly released my hand from Draco's. I glanced at him quickly to see him looking even paler than usual and his eyes wide like before.

He was being nice to me out of nothing but guilt.