Conditioning The Heart

C h a p t e r 19. Nerves and New Plans 😬🗓

It's Monday morning and I can't focus. All my homework is done and I have nothing to distract me from the nerves rushing through my stomach.

I'm so nervous about the date tonight.

I've been trying to distract myself all day, first trying to group facetime with Clarke and Sam but Clarke was sleeping and Sam was eating lunch with her parents. I tried watching some Grey's Anatomy but the drama in the episode just gave me more stress.

I considered doing some extra studying but decided I wasn't bored enough for that.

Instead, I re-watched How I Met Your Mother and let the familiarity calm me down.

But now it's one hour before the date and I'm freaking out again.

I stare blankly into my closet having no idea what to wear. I've never been on a date before so I have absolutely nothing to reference.

I look at my meagre makeup collection and ponder on whether to try and apply it myself and risk looking like a raccoon or just going bare-faced.

I look back into my closet, trying to see some outfits that could work. I check my phone to see the weather again. It's closing in on November and it seems that the Canadian winter is closing on us.

The carnival is outside and I do not want to be freezing... unless Zeke wants to give me his hoodie of course.

I decide on wearing something warm to accommodate and sorting through my closet to find something cute but warm to wear. I rifle through all the drawers and hangers tossing anything in my way.

I grab 3 potential sweaters and bottoms and drop them onto my bed. I pair them with the bottoms trying to choose on which pairing to wear.

I finally decide on a golden-yellow sweater top and a pair of black ripped-at-the-knee jeans. I walk over to my makeup collection and decide to do the makeup I'm most comfortable with.

I apply a BB cream to my face, do my brows, apply mascara, and put on a tinted lip balm to make my lips look a healthy pink colour.

I turn back to my only then realizing that my floor is strewn with clothes and stuffed animals I threw in my pursuit to get the perfect date outfit. As I'm cleaning up the mess I remember I have a black leather bag I can pair with the outfit and smile when I see it all put together.

I have my Doc Martens for when we have to leave, and I put on some silver earrings and a necklace to add a little elegance to the outfit.

I finish cleaning up my room, walking out of my room calling out "MOOOOOOOOOOOM"

I vaguely hear her call back so I assume she's in the basement. I quickly run down the stairs passing my brother yelling nonsense into his microphone, probably playing some video game with his friends.

I find my mom and dad in the basement watching Agents of Shield episodes. I clear my throat to get them to pay attention to me.

I twirl slightly and ask nervously, hoping she approves of the outfit. "Is this okay to wear to the carnival with Zeke?"

She smiles at my obvious nervousness " You look perfect. Don't worry so much it will be fine." "And if he doesn't like it i'll have to rip into him of course" my dad says with a slight smile.

I laugh at my dad's comment, and sit beside Mom where she gestures for me to.

I check my phone and sigh, still 40 minutes until he's supposed to pick me up.

~~

20 minutes later I'm still sitting cross legged on the couch, when my phone rings. I untangle my legs and walk away from the couch to get a little privacy.