ignite me / p. pevensie

rowyn

this chapter is completely inspired by a scene from the last of us part II

With lines of lead staining her hands, Rowyn blended the pencil marks around on the page. After a minute or so, she picked her pencil back up and began to lightly trace the details of the battlefield. The tree roots engaging in battle. The many Narnians working to defeat the Telmarines. She drew it all. But just as she was about to focus on Peter—who stood proudly with his sword raised and armor glistening—her hands began to shake and she squeezed her eyes closed. A cold brush on her shoulder made her shake her head and shut her journal just before throw it underneath her bed with a bit too much force.

It had been two months. Two months since everything she ever wanted was ripped away from her. Two months since she lost nearly everyone close to her. Rowyn took a deep breath as her throat closed and burned.

A small tap at her bedroom door made her finally open her eyes and glance up. "Hey," Charlie stood with a small smile upon his mouth and a guitar in his hands. "Can I come in?" Rowyn turned in her chair and motioned for him to come in.

"What's this?" She questioned at the instrument he held.

Charlie looked down at it and smiled. "Some folks call this thing here a gee-tar." 

Rowyn huffed out with a weak smile. "Funny." She replied and began to pick at her thumbs.

Charlie observed her for a moment before sitting down on the bed infront of her and propping the instrument on his knee. "Mind if I play something for you?" Rowyn met his gaze again and nodded. Charlie smiled. "Promise not to laugh."

Rowyn smiled a bit more genuinely. "I won't."

He smiled once again and adjusted the guitar on his lap. "I'm trusting you." Charlie sent her one last smile before looking down at the guitar. Slowly, he began to pluck at the strings, playing some introduction chords from memory before finally finding the song. Rowyn instantly recognized the song. She knew it to be the Pearl Jam song she forced her fathers to play on repeat the whole drive to a dinosaur museum they took her too for her fourteenth birthday. Charlie took the week off from work and she and her fathers took a week long trip to Wyoming so Rowyn could indulge in her dinosaur obsession. Her mouth threatened to smile at the memory but quickly stopped when she remember that just two weeks after that trip, she went to Narnia and lost Peter for the first time. She hadn't heard the song since then.

"If I ever were to lose you . . . I'd surely lose myself. Everything I have found here—I've not found by myself . . . try and sometimes you'll succeed to make this man of me . . . all my stolen missing parts—I've no need for anymore . . . 'cause I believe . . . and I believe because I can see . . . our future days—days of you and me." As Charlie played a few final chords to wrap up the song, Rowyn's eyes burned. Her father had never sung for her—he was also too shy about it, he wouldn't even let Sam hear. If Rowyn hadn't already sobbed violently once already that day, she would've done it at the moment. Charlie sheepishly looked up at her and smiled, not keeping his eyes to hers for long. "Well, there you go."

Rowyn smiled slightly and took a deep breath. "Well . . . that didn't suck." She let out a small chuckle.

Charlie huffed out and laughed quietly. "I'll take what I can get . . . here-" He handed the guitar to Rowyn. "It's yours." Rowyn's eyes widened as she placed the guitar in her lap just like he had.

"What no way—I don't even know the first thing about this thing." She began to protest but Charlie just shook his head.

"I'll teach you . . . it may help you cope—and I think you'd enjoy it." Rowyn took a deep breath and glanced at Casper—who stood beside her and brushed his hand with hers—and nodded. "What do you say? Tomorrow night, first lesson?"

Rowyn looked up at him with a grateful smile and nodded again. "Okay."

Charlie stood from the bed to crouch down in front of her. "Hey, I just wanted to tell you that I really appreciate you trying—I can't imagine how hard it is for you, but I know Peter wouldn't want to you just stop living . . . I think he would want you to live the life he was robbed of—you know that too." Charlie smiled up at her as she held his hand and squeezed it. "Thank you for trying, Ro—it means the world to Sam and I, we both just want you to be happy."

"I'm trying to be . . . it'll take some time but I'll get there—I don't want to sulk around, Peter wouldn't want that, but it won't happen overnight." Rowyn told him.

Charlie nodded. "We just have to be patient—all good things take time." Rowyn's heart twisted from his words as she thought of Peter. Charlie stood and kissed her forehead. "Goodnight, Kiddo." Rowyn repeated the words back to him and he turned to leave her room.

"Hey wait-" She said. Charlie stopped in her doorway and turned around. "Uh—yesterday you wanted to tell me that joke but forgot . . . d-did you remember it?"

Charlie smiled and leaned against the doorway. "What is the downside to eating a clock?" Rowyn took a deep breath, glanced at Casper, and shrugged with a small frown. "It's time consuming." Rowyn instantly smiled and shook her head.

"That's terrible." Her shoulders shook with a small laugh but it was genuine. Charlie smiled at his daughter and nodded.

"Yeah, I know." He told her and then placed his hand on the handle to her bedroom door. "Sleep well."

Rowyn smiled softly. "You too." And then Charlie shut the door and the sound of his footsteps moving away filled the room for a moment. Once his footsteps vanished, Rowyn looked down at the guitar. She admired the dark wood along with a moth which rested at the bottom of the guitar—she smiled as she traced it with her fingers. She then took a deep breath and looked up at Casper. She didn't say anything as the shadow reached his hand out to hold her shoulder she just smiled slightly.

Rowyn turned her attention back to the guitar and traced the cool metal strings as she thought back to that night under the stars with Peter.

"I would wait an infinite amount of years if it meant that I could spend the rest of forever with you . . . I told you before, there's never gonna be anyone for me but you." Rowyn could still hear Peter's voice echo in her head. Her eyes began to burn.

"I'll wait for you too. I don't care how long . . . I'll wait until I'm with you again . . . To whatever end, right?"

"To whatever end."

Rowyn removed her hand from the strings and took a deep breath just before squeezing her eyes shut. "All the promises at sundown, I meant them like the rest . . ." She sang out in a quiet, shaky voice into this section of time in which Peter was dead and she felt completely alone.