One World Too Many

Chapter 9: A Shouting Match

The Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher was sitting stiffly behind her desk with a small smile on her lips when the teens walked in. She was dressed in all pink with a large black bow on top of her head. Everyone was silent.

"Well, good afternoon!" she said when finally the whole class had sat down.

A few people mumbled "Good afternoon," in reply.

"Tut, tut," said Professor Umbridge. "That won't do, now, will it? I should like you, please, to reply 'Good afternoon, Professor Umbridge.' One more time, please. Good afternoon, class!"

"Good afternoon, Professor Umbridge," they chanted back at her.

"There, now," said Professor Umbridge sweetly. "That wasn't too difficult, was it? Wands away and quills out, please."

Many of the students softly groaned, but the demigods quickly stuffed their wands into their backpacks and exchanged them for their quills and parchment.

Professor Umbridge tapped the blackboard with her own wand and, immediately, words appeared.

Defense Against the Dark Arts:
A Return to Basic Principles

"Well now, your teaching in this subject has been rather disrupted and fragmented, hasn't it?" She clasped her hands in front of her. "The constant changing of teachers, many of whom do not seem to have followed any Ministry-approved curriculum, has unfortunately resulted in your being far below the standard we would expect to see in your O.W.L. year.

"You will be pleased to know, however, that these problems are now to be rectified. We will be following a carefully structured, theory centered, Ministry-approved course of defensive magic this year. Copy down the following, please."

She rapped the blackboard again; the first message vanished and was replaced by:

Course aims:
1.Understanding the principles underlying defensive magic.
2.Learning to recognize situations in which defensive magic can legally be used.
3.Placing the use of defensive magic in a context for practical use.

The students took a few minutes to write on their parchment, so the room was almost silent, except for the scratching of quills.

"Has everybody got a copy of Defensive Magical Theory by Wilbert Slinkhard?" Umbridge asked when everyone had finished writing.

Everyone either nodded or mumbled a quick "yes".

Umbridge lifted her eyebrows. "I think we'll try that again," she said. "When I ask you a question, I should like you to reply 'Yes, Professor Umbridge,' or 'No, Professor Umbridge.' So, has everyone got a copy of Defensive Magical Theory by Wilbert Slinkhard?" 

"Yes, Professor Umbridge" filled the room.

"Good." Umbridge nodded curtly. "I should like you to turn to page five and read chapter one, 'Basics for Beginners.' There will be no need to talk." She sat behind her desk and observed the students, leaning on her elbows, her hands clasped like a steeple in front of her mouth.

Again, the room was silent. The demigods had already read the book, which was just as boring that time as it was now, so they didn't even open their books, but they were surprised to see Hermione hadn't opened her book either. She was staring fixedly at Umbridge with her hand in the air. Umbridge however, was apparently determined to look the other way.

After a few more minutes of this, most of the class was watching Hermione's attempt to get Professor Umbridge's attention. Since there were only a few students still reading,
Umbridge decided that she couldn't ignore Hermione forever.