32 - be a man

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The concert is finally here.

Henry's on his way to pick me up, but he had to get Jordan first. I could've probably just walked to his house since it's right around the corner, but I'm a lazy bum.

When she found out that we got tickets and didn't invite her, she was sad. I felt awful because it never even crossed my mind to tell her that we were going. But Henry did eventually tell her and she made it her mission to buy herself a ticket.

She babysits for like two families on a regular basis and I'm guessing that's how she was able to buy her ticket. I'm glad she can come, I want to spend time with her like I used to.

"Madeline, when will you be home?" I furrow my eyebrows and turn around at the odd question. I was about to walk out my front door before my dad said anything.

I've never had a curfew. My parents have just always trusted me to come home and do what I was supposed to do. I guess you could say I earned it.

"I'm not really sure, dad. Probably late, I'm with Jordan and Henry," I shrug.

"Okay, I just know concerts can get pretty wild sometimes. You don't go to many, so I just want you to be smart," He smiles.

I give him a hug and then slip out the door before he takes a picture with me or something. He's been doing that a lot lately, random selfies.

I watch Henry's black Camry pull into my drive way and he honks the horn even though he sees me. I glare at him and run to get in the backseat of his car. There's clothes all over his backseat, it literally looks like a closet.

"Hey, Jordan!" I beam and she turns around, smiling softly.

Jordan's a pretty girl. I don't think she realizes it, but she is.

Here's the difference between Jordan and me: I have confidence. Now, I'm not saying I'll start singing in the middle of the mall. I just mean that I can do things that are a little out of my comfort zone.

But with Jordan, it's as if she has no self esteem.

She doesn't go out of her way to talk to people, let alone guys. If Henry and I ever invite her somewhere, she always asks who will be there first. And most always, never ends up going. It's like she's afraid of the world. Even the way she holds herself, it's very uncomfortable to look at. With her shoulders slightly slouched and her arms wrapped around her stomach.

I've tried to get her to be a little more inviting, but it's just not her. She's never had a boyfriend and sometimes it just makes me so sad. She's nineteen years old and I don't even think she's been hugged by a boy other then Henry.

I can tell she's insecure. There have been incidents where a person has asked her a question and she just acts like she doesn't hear them. She can come across as rude if you don't notice that something's wrong with her.

Whenever she spends the night, she curls up in my bed at like eight o'clock and goes to sleep.

I just don't understand why she's like this.

She talks quiet a bit to Henry and I. It's just that she chooses not to talk to everyone else. Some people are happier when they stick to themselves. But Jordan isn't and it's not hard to tell. So why do it?

Henry and I talk for hours upon hours about it. The three of us met in high school and we literally haven't changed. She's always been like this, whatever this is. Everyone notices. Teachers, kids, my parents.

One of the worst incidents was when my mom and dad tried to talk to her about it. It wasn't really any of their business, but I couldn't stop them. They said that they were concerned and offered to make an appointment with some kind of doctor for her. She ended up crying and I let her take a nap in my room.

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