Infatuation | Bucky Barnes

Chapter Forty Seven

Catherine felt entirely numb as she sat kneeled down in front of the ashes that had once been her husband. She had only felt so defeated a few times in her life; when she found out about who she really was and when she found out the Winter Soldier had killed her parents. She reached out again with a bloody hand and ran her fingertips over the ash hoping he would magically appear again. She wanted to scream. She wanted to cry, but she wouldn't. At least not in front of everyone.

Bucky was gone. The Avengers had lost. It wasn't fair. She had lost Bucky over and over again. The moment she had him back and hopefully for good, some other horrible person, or alien she should say, took him from her. To make matters worse, she still had no idea where Tony was and if he was okay.

It took awhile for anyone to move or say anything. Everyone just stood motionless. Occasionally, someone would make eye contact with someone else, but that was it. They didn't know what to say or do. Were there ever words to soften the blow that was the end of the world? Friends were gone. Family was gone.

They needed medical attention. All of them. The blood from the wound on Catherine's head had already dried. "We should go."

Thor looked over at her. "Go where?"

"Back to the compound. M-Maybe we can track Thanos and get the stones back. I don't know..." she trailed off.

The talking raccoon scoffed. "You want to get your ass kicked again? There's even less of us now."

"It's better than standing here doing nothing." She snapped.

"Catherine," Steve spoke softly. He knew she was barely holding herself together. Her lashing out was a desperate way to hide the grief and pain she was feeling. Steve looked around at the beaten group; Natasha, Rhodey, Bruce, Catherine, Rocket, and Thor. "She's right. We need to go back to the compound."

Even though it was Catherine's idea, she remained where she stood. She didn't want to leave. Hundreds of feet away was where she married Bucky a day ago. She glanced down at the two rings on her hand and felt a sob about to escape her throat, but she quickly swallowed it back. She felt someone touch her shoulder and she glanced up to see Steve standing there.

"I don't want to leave." Her voice was barely audible.

"I know, but the fight isn't over. We need you." He told her and extended a hand to help her stand up.

"I need to get a few things first." She told him.

The hut Bucky and her had shared at somehow not been scathed during the fight. She was thankful for that. When she walked in, she was hit by the familiar smell of Bucky and she almost collapsed to her knees again. Her eyes gazed across the bed that they didn't sleep in. She looked at the kitchen where they had cooked so many meals and talked about the future together. Her wedding dress laid over one of the chairs and she walked over to it.

She ran her fingers over the soft fabric before picking it up and placing it in the garment bag she had brought it in. She also placed her bouquet and flower crown in it. She was going to preserve as much as she could. It would be the only things she had to remember Bucky by. She grabbed one of his worn notebooks that he scratched down memories into when they finally reappeared back in his mind. Then, she took one last look at the only place that ever felt like home with him.

Something shiny caught her attention as she walked out. A chain with two dog tags hung on a makeshift hook. She reached out with a shaky hand and realized it was Bucky's dog tags. He never took them off. She would have remembered. She ran her fingers over to metal and a sob escaped her mouth. She slipped the cold chain around her neck and finally left.