The Wandering God

51 Part With What You Treasure 3/3

忍痛割愛
Rěntòng gē'ài
Part with what you treasure.
Part reluctantly with what one treasures.

*~*~*~*~*~*

"How can a carriage and a whole troop of soldiers just vanish?!" Sanli exclaimed.

They had returned to Kageyama's room. Sanli paced the floor, while Ao sat beside Kageyama, reading over Zhangyu's letter.

"Ermi's party was almost to the capital," said Ao in surprise. "They do not think... the rebels?" her voice was faint.

The image of the fingerless body pulled from the canal appeared in Kageyama's mind. He knew Sanli and Ao saw the same thing. He shook his head, and tried not to associate the image with Ermi.

"I do not think it was the rebels," said Kageyama quickly. "Zhangyu mentions in his letter, there were no signs of a struggle or confrontation. The only evidence found was scorch marks from where the party last made camp."

Ao frowned. "That is not much information to go on."

Kageyama nodded, folding his arms into the sleeves of his yukata. "I will gather what I can when I reach the capital, and start my search from there."

"You mean when we reach the capital," Sanli corrected.

Kageyama shook his head. "You are not coming, Sanli," he ground out. "It is too dangerous. We already spoke of this."

"I am not sitting here while Ermi is in the hands of some-"

"If you really care about Ermi, you will stay here! You will slow me down traveling, and once we reach the Central Regions I will not be able to look after you while I search for-"

"I am not completely useless you know! You make me sound like a child!"

"You are a child!" Kageyama yelled. "You pout and sulk and complain about the state of the world, and about your own role in it, and yet take no action to change it! And I do not have time for it right now!"

Sanli clamped his mouth shut. The prince's face was more hurt than angry. Kageyama knew this was because he had hit close to the truth.

Still, he regretted it. "I am sorry Sanli. I don't want us to fight before I go. I am just worried for Ermi."

Sanli's mouth was tight. He bent and gathered up his bedroll and blankets. "You have to rise early tomorrow Sho Sensei. You should get some rest. I will sleep in Ao's room so as not to disturb you."

*~*~*~*~*~*

Even alone in his room, without Sanli tossing and turning beside him, Kageyama did not sleep well the rest of the night.

He could not shake the feeling that something was wrong. There was something he had missed.

He rose at dawn, to watch the sunrise from a room on the side of the house that looked out across a small lagoon filled with water lilies. All around the lake other houses like his own stood, giving the quiet, secluded scene the feeling of a perfect painting.

Kageyama sat, still on his cushion, as the sun at last peered over the roofs of the houses opposite him across the pond. Suddenly, he did not want to be sitting anymore.

He stood and made his way down to the courtyard.

Outside the sky was pink and faint orange as the sun rose. It made Kageyama think of the color the cherry blossoms would be, when the tree in the middle of the courtyard bloomed.

He suddenly thought of Ermi, last summer, in a yukata of pale blue speckled with pink cherry blossoms, blushing as he helped her fix her collar. Sakura suited the little princess.