Is This Happiness

45

"I didn't know." He stares into my eyes wiping away any tears that came. I wanted to believe him so badly.

"It doesn't matter if you're sorry you're just going to do it again."

"This was the last time." His voice cracks breaking with heart, again. A heavy feeling weighs down onto my chest.

His hands burning me.

"I don't believe you." I let out a shaky breath.

"Baby." He starts, by grabbing my face.

"Don't." I pry his hands away from me with my shaking hands. He doesn't move an inch, letting me do as I please.

"Stefano I cant do it anymore."

"What can't you do? What the fuck are you talking about." The closer he moved to me the bigger my steps were.

"You're my wife, remember?" I shake my head ignoring the way his darkish tone made me feel.

"You lied. You always lie to me. Nothing is real, stop using me!" He grabs my arms.

"Don't touch me!" I didn't recognize my voice. Neither did he, letting go of me instantly.

"Please make it stop. Stop it! You drive me crazy I shouldn't have to feel this." I scream to the top of my voice feeling the little energy I had leave my body at once.

He just stands there shocked. He didn't move, he didn't blink or try to speak. Looking at me like i'm insane, and maybe I am.

"Carmen." I drop to the floor, the pain fills evenly throughout my entire body. I didn't care about his voice calling out to me. I reminded me of the hopeless nights of my endless mental torture without him.

The nights i'd beg him to come back to me. To even wake up from the nightmare I lived in without him there.

Obsession and infatuation were like love and hate. A very thin line between the two. My need for him every second of every moment crept up behind my back.

The obsession was always there. It always is, the ounce of passion you crave deep inside will always be pushing to release.

You'll always want more. There's nothing you can do once you've fallen. You're in too deep, the first wave is over.

You've been caught into a ripping current, with no way out. No hope, nothing.

The feeling of my head being lifted and put onto a fabric provokes another gut wrenching sob from my burning throat.

Stefano takes my head into his hands, holding it to his chest tightly rocking my body.

My pain echos the room, freeing the indescribable pain located in the left of my chest.

"I'm so sorry."

                                 VOTE!!

hi these updates have been kind of short i'm sorry :( I love you, thanks for reading.

I can relate to carmen a lot, this hurt to write. If any of you have been through the same know you're never alone in that