(So the nations wanted to visit Skyrim and...)
Prussia: *gets shot in the head with an arrow*
Skyrim: ......You- Uh.... Y-You're fine.
Skyrim: Least it wasn't an arrow to the knee if you know what I mean!
Prussia: What?
Skyrim: *sighs* You outsiders know nothing, do you?
~
Skyrim: We need to kill some spiders.
America: This should be easy!
*frostbite spider appears*
America: OH MY GOD, IT'S HUGE!! KILL IT WITH FIRE!
France: We don't have any fire!
Spain: Ah!
Skyrim: ....You three are worse than a child set to fight a warrior. *stabs the spider*
Skyrim: If you can't kill that then how will you manage killing a troll or even a werewolf?!
England: You just got out everything here, don't you?
England: Trolls, dragons, vampires, imps, elves, giants, dwarves.. Even ogres.
France: You're in paradise, aren't you Angleterre?
Skyrim: Shut it before I throw you in a cave full of Draugr. I'm sure they would be happy to dismember you and feed ya to the skeevers.
~
Skyrim: Come! We must kill a dragon.
America: Oh cool!
Skyrim: No, not cool. Dragons a foul beasts that will kill you in a split second if you aren't careful.
England: What a lovely place.. *note the sarcasm*
Skyrim: You need to keep a watchful eye cause everything's out to get ya. First rule of Skyrim, boys.
~
Skyrim: Eat this. *throws a Daedric heart at America*
America: *drops it* WHAT THE FUCK!?
Skyrim: JUST EAT THE GOD DAMN DAEDRIC HEART, YOU IDIOT!
~
Skyrim: *running up the 7000 steps* Hurry! The Greybeards wish to meet you.
America: *panting* Who the hell lives on top of a mountain this big?
England: Apparently the Greybeards do.
Spain: How big is this mountain anyways?
Skyrim: *from a high cliff* IT'S NOT CALLED THE THROAT OF THE WORLD FOR NOTHING! NOW HURRY UP!!
France: All right, we are coming!
~
Skyrim: *taking England to the College of Winterhold*
Cultists: Are you the one they call Dragonborn?
England: Umm..?
Skyrim: Fuck off, ya damn cultists.
Skyrim: *pushes the cultist off into a ravine*
Skyrim: Now.. To the college.
England: ..... *looks down into the ravine then at Skyrim* Bloody hell, you are insane!
~
Skyrim: Who wants to meet my family?
England: Are they as crazy as you?
Skyrim: Well they are assassins.. so yes.
France: Oh good, a family of assassins... Just what this country needs.
Skyrim: Trust me, you'll like them. Especially Gabriella. She killed a unicorn once with a crochet needle on a starry night at the beach.
France: Oh? Lovely..
~
Skyrim: I promised Cicero a day out so you will either have to come with us or do your own thing and hopefully not get yourselves killed.
Spain: We'll come with you.
Skyrim: All right, put on something nice. We're going to the Blue Palace, then we'll visit an old friend before heading to find Sheogorath for dinner, and watching the Divines in the night sky.
America: Jeez, even a day off sounds like hard work.
Skyrim: Yes, that is what life in Skyrim is about. You work for your earnings. Unless you're a thief but even then, they had to find the loot and not get caught so they earned their keep.
England: Wow.. You even respect thieves.
Skyrim: At least they work hard for their dinner unlike you.
America: Oooh! You just got burned!!
~
Sheogorath: CHEESE!!!
Skyrim: Why did I expect something nicer for dinner?
Cicero: *laughs* Oh Listener~!
America: That's a lot of cheese..
England: No kidding.
Spain: Let's just hope it doesn't rain.
Skyrim: DON'T CROSS US OVER BY SAYING IT THEN!
Skyrim: We are eating with a Daedric Prince after all. Talos knows what power he has.
Sheogorath: Surely you've heard of me?
France: Non.
America: What does Daedric even mean?
Skyrim: *slams her face onto the stone table* KILL ME NOW!!
