JoJo(s) React To The Fandom

Asks For Ocean Man (Jotaro)

1. How are you feeling Star Platinum?

Jotaro: He's a Stand ? He doesn't have feelings? And I don't think he can say anything but "ora"

Star Platinum: I'm NOT doing alright. First, Jotaro decided to roll out of bed this morning and almost broke his elbow like an idiot. Secondly, he forgot to brush his teeth.

Jotaro: YOU CAN TALK????

Star Platinum: DONT BREATHE ON ME - YOUR BREATHE REEKS!

Kakyoin: Imagine your Stand calling you out. Can't relate. Me and Green are best friends!

Jotaro: Shut up.

2. What do you think of cherry donuts?

Joseph: Yikes...

Jotaro:...

Jotaro: I enjoy them.

Jotaro: But one time they made me cry while I was in a donut shop.

Jotaro: So, I punched the table and broke it.

Jotaro: I am now banned from that shop.

Polneraff: Dramatic.

Jotaro: Chickens.

Polneraff: [sobs]

3. What inspired you to be a marine biologist?

Jotaro: The ocean is a dark and powerful force of nature. Like me.

Kakyoin: Stop fucking lying.. You have a thing for dolphins.

Jotaro: ...What the hell? No I don't? I respect them as graceful kings of the sea.

Kakyoin: Awe, they're your kings? Romantic.

Jotaro: You better shut the hell up.

Joseph: It is an odd choice of career for you. You hated high-school yet you manged to get PHD?

Polneraff: Suspicious. I think Kakyoin might be right.

Kakyoin: The passion has to come from somewhere, and he doesn't have a heart so-

Jotaro: STAR PLATINUM - ZA WARUDO!

[Time Stops]

Kakyoin: [moves]

Jotaro: WHAT THE FUCK-!?B I T C H! W T F?

4. What do you think of your fangirls?

Jotaro:....

Jotaro: You can guess.

Polneraff: You should treat woman with respect!

Jotaro: Why? They can handle being disrespected.

Kakyoin: And that, is why you were a virgin until you got married. And why that marriage failed.

Jotaro: Good grief. Must you be an asshole?

Polneraff: Says you.

Avdol: By the way, all of us know you two lost your virginty to each other.

Kakyoin: Who says I was a virgin?

Polneraff: You were alone your whole life???

Kakyoin: No. Hieropahnt Green. :)

Joseph: OH MY GOD!

Jotaro: You didn't...?

Kakyoin: Maybe :)

Avdol: You are the embodiment of sin.

5. Did (granny) Lisa Lisa teach you that five cigarette trick?

Jotaro: I only met the woman once, when I was really young.

Jotaro: She showed me the trick, and when I started smoking (at 15) I practiced everyday to learn it. Burnt my tongue about a hundred times.

Joseph: Suzie was pissed that Lisa taught him that "smoking was cool".

Jotaro: I now realize why I grew up so messed up, I had no role models.

Joseph: You had me!

Jotaro: My point exactly.

6. Do you have a crush in Kakyoin?

Jotaro: No! Why the hell would I like him?

Jotaro: Number one, he is the most two-faced guy I've ever met. He'll act all kind and polite at first, but the moment you piss him off or he decides you're close enough to him: he'll turn into a fucking gremlin. Just the other day he fuckong stole my pillow from under my head while I was sleeping because "he needed another one."

Jotaro: Number two, he is flat out crazy. Have you seen him play video games and throw the remote at the wall before smashing it into a million pieces wishing it was you he was aggressively gripping with white knuckles pounding on the desk-?

Jotaro: I mean...! Um...

Jotaro: He'a a ginger! That stupid hair noddle frames his face perfectly...[trials off and begins to twirl a peice of his hair] and his red locks of hair look like a halo of flames around his sharp jawline...his eyes are like perfectly cut amethyst, cutting into you no matter which way you look at them... 

Joseph: [snickering as he records this]

Jotaro: And his lean arms make me feel safe and secure when they're wrapped around me...and his warm slender hand on my shoulder makes me feel grounded... his hands are slightly callused did you know that? Its probably from years of holding a pencil and drawing across thousands of sheets of paper...i want him to touch me so bad that it-

Joseph: [busts out laughing]

Jotaro: FUCK! YOU DIDN'T HEAR ANYTHING JIJI-

Kakyoin: [smirks] No, but I heard it.

Jotaro: .... No witnesses shall be allowed to live.

Joseph: WAIT! JOTARO-!

Jotaro: STAR PLATINUM KICK THEIR ASSES-

[We'll Be Right Back]

-ASK JOTARO AND THE GANG QUESTIONS HERE-