Amadea's fate.

Chapter 11

STILL IN THIRD PERSON'S POV.

[Trigger warning: Rape and suicide are  implied. If you feel uncomfortable reading this theme,stop reading after the [‡] sign and move to the next chapter]

Amadea woke up with a start. She winced at the pain in her neck reminding her that she spent the night on a hard and cold bench in the park.

Noticing the damp state of her dress, Amadea burst into tears. It was bad enough that her parents disowned her but at this rate, she was sure that no inn would let her board because of her disease out of fear that  they'd contact the disease.

She had considered going to Malli ( her lover) but she didn't even know how to find him. She had never been to his house.
They always met in the inn Hume had initially taken them to.
She had no doubt in her mind that he had heard what happened to her. She knew he probably would go out of his way to avoid her to avoid being linked to her predicament.

Amadea didn't have any friends. When she had lived with her parents no one wanted to be seen with her because of the level of poverty of her parents and now because of the disease she had and the damage her reputation had faced.

Her only true friend had been Remi but she had left her too even if she hadn't wanted to.

Remembering Remi brought tears to her eyes. She could only hope that Remi's son, Baki would be taken care of since she wasn't there and prior to her misfortune,she had been his guardian.

Amadea was brought out of her thoughts by a tap on her hand.

She looked up to see Mr. Nelby, her social studies teacher while she was in primary/ elementary school.

"Amadea. What's going on? Why are you here? It's dangerous to be out here at this time all alone."

He was right. It was morning but it wasn't even sunrise yet.

"Mr Nelby, I know it's dangerous but I don't have a choice. I have nowhere to go to."

" Why don't you come with me to my house? At least till the day is bright."

Amadea hesitated before deciding to take him up on his offer.
He was one of her favourite teachers when she was in school and he'd always been so kind to her.
Surely, he wouldn't try to hurt her.

She didn't know how wrong she was.

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(Trigger warning. Again.)

It was a short walk from the park to Mr. Nelby's house but Amadea was famished by the time they had gotten to their destination since she hadn't eaten since the previous day and when Mr. Nelby offered her a glass of milk and a small loaf of bread, she didn't think anything of it.

She fell asleep shortly after eating and when she woke up and found herself on the floor,she burst into tears.

She immediately knew what had happened.
There was a pain in her nether region that hadn't been there before.

She couldn't believe that he'd taken advantage of her.

As soon as she heard his footsteps coming from the direction of his room, she stood up and glared at him. 

He didn't even have the decency to look guilty.

"Oh!! Dea you're awake. You seemed tired earlier. I hope you are well rested now."
He said beaming.

Amadea couldn't help it. She slapped him.

" You monster. How could you do this to me? I trusted you. How could you?"

Holding his bruised cheek, he said with a sneer,
" Oh please. Spare me the dramatics. You secretly wanted it. Do you think I didn't see the way you were looking at me? Besides, everyone knows you are a whore."

Amadea couldn't believe this was the same person who taught so passionately he had won the prize for the best teacher throughout her elementary education.
She couldn't believe she had fallen for his facade.

After wiping her tears, she left his house feeling lost and dirty.

She walked with no destination in mind.

What would she do? She had no one to go to.
She couldn't tell anyone about what Nelby had done to her. It's not like anyone would believe her.

He was the perfect gentleman in the eyes of the people of Mhilia.
  
Respectable, fairly rich, average looking but kind–hearted.

Those were the thoughts of the people concerning him.
They couldn't see past his facade.
They'd probably say she seduced him instead.

★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★

Amadea found a small stream while walking aimlessly.

She tried to wash away the dirt from her skin.
Even though she wasn't awake when it happened, she couldn't help but feel dirty.
She scratched her skin till she began to bleed, yet she couldn't stop feeling used.

Disgrace. Worthless. Whore. Useless.

She couldn't stop the voices.

No one wants you. Why don't you just do everyone a favour and end it? No one would miss you. You're just a whore anyway.

Amadea held her head trying and failing to make the voices go away.

"It's not like it's not true". She found herself saying.
" I'm just a whore. Since everyone seems to think so it must be true. No one would ever want to be associated with me. This disease would end up killing me. Let me just fasten the process."

After strengthening her resolve, Amadea began to look for anything that could give her a swift end.

She plucked some Ehi leaves. Guaranteed to kill whoever consumes it within ten minutes.
It was usually used by the people of Mhilia as a poison for rodents.

Crying, Amadea brought the leaves to her mouth and chewed it.

It's not like my death would make a difference. She thought.

If only she had known that help was on the way.

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Hi. It's me again. I just wanted to say that suicide is never the answer and you aren't alone.I'm here if you need to talk to someone.