Married to the Northerner

13

I tried to hide my shocked expression at the guards' information. He hasn't spoken to me, let alone see me in weeks, why would he want me now? I try to maintain my composure and nod my head at the guard before walking towards my husband's bedroom. I knock on the door, timidly, truly curious of what will happen.

"Come in."

I heard a loud voice, the rich velvety voice of my husband, before I slowly opened the door.

He was looking out the window at the ocean, as the sun shone brightly on his face. There was something held in his hands, it seems to be like a piece of paper.

"One of the guards informed me that you called me."

His posture went rigid and he seemed to not utter a single word. The only noise was the crashing of the waves and our breaths.

He finally turned around and faced me, a tiresome look on his face. We may have not shared many words, but I still cared for him. He is my husband after all and as a wife isn't it my duty to look after the well-being of my husband; that is the only reason I care for him right?

Deep down I knew the answer, yet I didn't want to admit it. Maybe after receiving a bit of care and respect from him made me fall so quickly in love, due to going through hate and abuse every day.

"You're here. I-I need to tell you that our landing will be delayed as the captain expects a storm ahead."

There was this unusual edge to his voice and in an instant I knew he was lying, or attempting to at least. His hand rubs the back of his neck as his fingered play with the paper.

"Did you call me just to say that?"

I asked calmly, hoping he will talk to me as my husband, or at least a companion. I don't know anything about him, but each second with him ignoring me felt worse than the punches I received. I was scared of my fate, leaving myself so vulnerable to this man.

"Yes, that's all."

He nodded his head and I sighed in disappointment. Maybe he's not ready to talk about it quite yet, but hopefully we will soon. I know once we arrive on land, he will be too busy, as the King and I fear our relationship will end.

I heard of kings who send their queens to an estate far away if their marriage is broken. This may be an arrangement, but it is also the only hope I have at family. Those kings often remarry, if not live their lives with countless mistresses. I feared my fate would be similar, therefore summoned all the courage within me and confronted him.

"Nathaniel, I know the reason behind you avoiding me and I cannot say I regret running away from that life. The few weeks I've been here we're spent much happier than years trapped in that castle. I understand if you would not want me to be your ruling Queen of Nordfjord."

I felt my eyes water up, but was determined to not show any signs of weakness. I couldn't even look at him before I walked out. Clearly he is not ready to talk yet, or is avoiding telling the truth.

"Wait, Avani."

I felt his hand grab my arm and turn my body around to face his own. I tilted my neck to see his gorgeous face and I let myself crumple as a tear fell from my eye. He tenderly wipes it with his rough fingers before cupping my face.

"I'm sorry for ignoring you after you opened yourself up to me. I shouldn't have done something so cowardly like that, but I didn't know how to react or what to say.

You are my wife and I vowed to protect you, yet you committed a grave sin. I didn't know whether the righteous king within me should expose and punish his wife or hide her secret and protect her."

"I want you to do what you think is right, even if it means punishing me. As they say, actions have consequences."

I never want Nathaniel to lose his morals over this rash decision I made. I was not thinking right and this seemed like the only option.

"Yes, but there are also reasons behind such actions. This marriage may have been an arrangement, but I want to know you, Avani, to be a good husband to you.

I want to know the reason behind you running away, that is when you are ready to tell me that is. I vow to you that I will be beside you and not ignore you like I have foolishly done before."

I remained quiet, debating to myself whether I should tell everything to my husband or not. I trust that he will keep his promise, yet another part of me is scared he will despise me after. I have never told anyone of my past and talking about it with him seems like a big leap, in our relationship and my personal life.

"Look Avani. You don't have to tell me now, but if it makes you feel better, why don't I tell you about my family."

"I would appreciate that."

Being royals, I knew I would live in the same walls as my in laws. I have wondered of his family, yet I was too scared to ask anyone. I believed he was the only person who could talk about them, but our relationship seemed to be a bit shaky.

"My mother and father were and are lovely parents. My father died, leaving me to be next in line for the crown. My mother remains alive and helps me with the royal duties.

I have no siblings, but my right hand man, Tommy's older brother is Maxfield, his wife, and their infant son are like my family.

The reason I have no siblings is because my mother and father were not right for each other as husband and wife. Similar to us, they were thrown into a forced marriage, but thankfully unlike us they seemed to hate each other from the start.

I heard that my father loved a woman during his youth, but she unfortunately died of a sickness. My grandfather did not give him any time to heal and forced him to marry my mother.

I can't entirely blame my father or his deceased lover, as my mother is a complicated person. She shows her affection to me, but she also knows how to show strong distaste to some she despises, such as my father.

For the sake of needing an heir, they had me, but after their firstborn being a son, they found no use for bearing any more children.

My mother and father lived very separated lives, but it was better than them being in the same room. I learned to accept that and move on from it."

My heart nearly broke in two hearing his story. While the love story of my parents gave me hope, his parent's story broke his heart. My heart nearly skipped a beat as he held a hidden message behind his words, stating our marriage will be nothing like his parents; that there is still hope for our marriage.

"I'm sorry that you had to go through that."

"It wasn't your fault and I believe there is a reason for everything. Hearing my parents' story, I made a vow to myself to never love a woman except my wife, and I couldn't be more grateful I kept my promise.

It helped me be a strong King for my people instead of spending time falling in love. I also hope it will help me be a better husband for my beloved wife."

I felt heat spread across my face at his kind words. I felt joy knowing I was the only woman he has ever and will ever love.

"You are truly an amazing King and I believe an equally amazing husband."

Something in his eyes changed as I said those words, but he seemed to get rid of it in a flash and go back to his old self.

If our marriage was ever to be a success then I must trust him and myself. Before I can learn to love him, I must learn to love myself. If I need to move on, then I need to get it off my chest.

"Nathaniel, I want to tell you about my past. I hope your opinion of me won't change after listening to this."

I held his hands as tears filled my eyes, flashing back to each event. His fingers tightly yet comfortingly entangled with his own and I felt myself finally having the courage to open up to my husband.