Blair Silver

Part 24: Hurt

Blair and I planned to go out on Saturday, but when Jillian texts me early that morning, I know I'm going to have to cancel. I call him before I do anything else, biting my lip anxiously. 


It rings three times before he picks up, yawning. "Morning, Teddy Bear." 


I smile in spite of myself. "Hi, Blair." 


"So, what's up?" 


I take a deep breath. "I'm really sorry, Blair, but I don't think I can go out today... something came up." 


"Alright," he says, his voice gentle. "Is everything okay?" 


I sigh. "Yeah, for the most part. Can we reschedule, though? Does Wednesday work?" 


I can hear his smile through his voice. "Sure. My house? I can pick you up." 


"Okay. Thank you so much, Blair. I'm really sorry." 


"Don't be. It's no problem at all. See you Wednesday, then?" 


"See you." I hang up, taking a deep breath, then go downstairs and start towards Jillian's house. 


-

I find Jillian in her room, and escort her down to the basement, then go to raid her freezer for ice cream. I bring it downstairs, along with two sets of bowls and spoons. She's curled up on the couch, the corners of her mouth pulled down, eyes sad. I go to sit beside her, passing her the ice cream. She sadly scoops some into the bowl, starting to eat it slowly. 


"Do you want to talk about it?" I ask quietly. 


She takes a small bite of ice cream. "His sister set him up on a date."

Yikes.

"He told me last night... she'd asked him, and he'd said yes, and she set him up with one of her friends. So he went out with this girl, and he said it was a lot of fun..."

"I'm so sorry, Jilly," I say, giving her a hug. "I'm so sorry you had to listen to him talk about his date with another girl."

"I mean, I didn't want to be rude... even if he does start dating her, I'd still like to talk to him. Once I get over him, I can- I can just like him as a friend."

Not a chance. When Jillian likes someone, they either need to be horrible to her or disappear from her life for her to get over them. This could go south very quickly.

"So he told me about the date, and I smiled and pretended to be happy for him- well, I am happy he's happy. I don't want him not to be happy. I just..." She sighs. "So I lied and said I had to go for dinner, to hang up."

"I'm so sorry, Jilly..." I rub her back comfortingly. "That's an awful situation to be in."

She sniffs. "I feel kind of bad for lying to him. He was smiling, and he wanted to share his being happy with me, and I lied to get out of it..."

"Don't feel bad at all. You need to take care of yourself, first and foremost. And if lying is what you needed to do, then I'm very glad that you did it, and I'm so proud of you for putting your needs above everything else."

"I just..." a tear slips out. "I just wonder if he even thinks of me as a... a girl. Someone he could date, if he wanted to. Or if I'm just a friend to him. Because he told his sister he wouldn't mind going on a date for a change. And I just don't know if he even sees me as an option. I don't know."

"I'm so, so sorry, Jilly," I tell her, because I know that she's liked Elliot a lot for a long time. And honestly, who wouldn't? He's cute and sweet and funny, and they've been talking a lot, and had plans to hang out, so... it makes sense that she could have been a bit hopeful about her chances. To have her hopes dashed like that...