Chapter 42 - You weren't there

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"Ollie, what the bloody hell is this? Your girlfriend is staring at me through a talking mirror!" Marlo shouted across the room, looking at Erin's reflection weirdly. The girl was staring at her with huge eyes and it looked as if she'd been crying.

"Ollie! Get your arse out of bed. I think she's crying!"

Erin's hands were shaking and she couldn't take her eyes off of Marlo. The girl looked flawless, even when she had just gotten out of bed.

Oliver was at home, in his bed, and Marlo was there too. She had slept at Oliver's place. He hadn't shown up to their date in Hogsmeade because he was sleeping with Marlo. After three months of not seeing her, he had replaced her.

Erin couldn't breath. She was choking on her tears as she started shaking vigorously. Her knuckles turned white as she gripped the mirror tightly.

"Oliver, I think you better get over here", she heard Marlo say, but she didn't want to hear her voice anymore and she definitely didn't want to see Oliver. She'd never expected that there'd be a time where the last thing she wanted was to see Oliver, to see her Captain.

So before he could appear in the reflection, she gathered all the anger she was feeling and broke it. She broke it in as many pieces as she could, tears blurring her vision. Her hands were bleeding from where the shards had cut through her skin, but she didn't feel any physical pain. All she could feel was her heart breaking slowly, in just as many pieces as the mirror that laid at her feet.

She could barely process what was happening. Her whole body was shaking, so she pulled her knees to her chest as tightly as possible, digging her nails in the palms of her hands to try and numb the pain. She wanted to scream, to punch something, to hurt something. But all she did was hurt herself, as her vision started to blur. She pressed her hands against her temples and tried to breathe, but the panic attack was taking over. She wanted to vanish, to just not exist anymore.

"Erin? Erin!" Erin didn't look up at the sound of her name, she couldn't. All she could do was panic.

"Erin? What's happened?" Erin felt one hand wrap around her shoulders as the other one was placed over hers. The warm hand felt nice against her cold skin. Erin's teeth were chattering and her breathes were mixed with loud sobs.

"Hey, Erin, just listen to my voice okay?" George held her a little tighter, rubbing her hands to calm her down.

"Just focus on your breathing. Don't think about anything else, just focus on breathing in and breathing out." Erin nodded, just trying to do what George said. She had no clue how to handle herself or what to do in general, so she just did what he said. She'd do anything to get out of her head right now.

"You're doing really well, Erin. Just forget about everything and listen to your breaths. Just in and out, you're doing great", George continued. In just a couple of minutes, he had calmed her down.

"Are you okay?" he asked gently, pulling away a little so he could look at her. Erin reluctantly looked up and her lip started quivering the moment she did so.

"Hey, it's okay, come here." George pulled her into a tight hug, letting her cry into his shoulder. Erin started to distinguish voices. She looked up to see Fred standing a bit further with Beatrice and Meredith. Erin let go, wanting to go back to the castle before the entire school was looking at her.

"Here, let me get you up", George said, taking her hands. He gently pulled her to her feet, making sure she was steady. Beatrice walked up to her and pulled her into a hug.

"I know, it's okay", she whispered. She knew he hadn't shown up, but she would freak out if she knew why.

"Bloody hell you're bleeding", Beatrice gasped, inspecting Erin's hands, which were covered in cuts and nail marks. "That needs to be cleaned."

"I'm just going to go back to the castle. I'll clean them there", Erin said, her voice hoarse and shaky.

"Yeah and I'll come with you", Beatrice offered, but Erin didn't want that. She hadn't seen Meredith in three months. They deserved to spend some time together.

"I'm sorry I didn't wait with you. I should have been here", Beatrice added.

"No, no, not at all. Please have fun with Meredith, you've looked forward to that for so long. I'll be fine."

"You're not going alone, no way in hell", Beatrice said.

"It's okay", Meredith said, but Erin shook her head vigorously.

"No, I really don't want that. Please just have fun, for me."

"I'll go with her", George said. "I've got nothing planned for today. I'll make sure she's okay." Beatrice looked at him for a while, not sure what to do. She knew Erin wouldn't let her come to the castle with her, but she really wanted her to be okay. She needed her to be okay.

"Please take care of her", she said eventually, blinking away the tears in her eyes. She hated to see her best friend so hurt and it had been Oliver Wood again who had been the cause of it.

George nodded, laying one hand on Erin's back to guide her back to the carriages. Fred tagged along as well, a pained look in his eyes.

"Erin?"

Erin froze at the sound of his voice. Her feet stopped working and her eyes widened. She turned around and looked at him, the person who she so desperately wanted around an hour ago. He was here.

"Erin, I'm so sorry. Please let me explain", Oliver said, making Erin start shaking again. Beatrice had noticed Oliver's arrival and pushed him away harshly.

"You stay the hell away from her, you prick!" she shouted at him, blocking his path to Erin.

"Just let me explain, it's not what she thinks", Oliver started, panic showing in his eyes.

"Not what she thinks? You weren't there! There's absolutely nothing more to it", Beatrice hissed. Meredith tried to calm Beatrice down, but the girl was furious.

"Come on, Bea. Maybe he really has a good reason for being this late", Meredith shrugged. They didn't know what Erin knew. They hadn't seen what Erin had seen.

"Do you want to talk to him?" George whispered. His hand still resting on the small of her back. Erin shook her head, new tears forming in her eyes. He had cheated on her.

"Hey, it's okay", George mumbled again, wrapping his arm tighter around her, holding her shaking hands.

"Can you get your hand off my girlfriend, please?" Oliver snapped, clearly angry now. He shot daggers at George, his hands balling into fists. George didn't reply, not wanting to upset Erin.

"I said, hands off", Oliver said again, charging at him. Meredith and Beatrice tried to hold him off, but Oliver was much taller and stronger than them. He pushed George away and Erin flinched.

That was what hit Oliver. The moment Erin flinched when he came near her. As if she was scared of him. It broke his heart that he had done something that could cause her to flinch around him. The scared look in her eyes was something he'd never forget.

"Erin" he whispered, not knowing what to do. He just needed to explain the situation to her. She didn't deserve to be so broken over something that was only partially real.

"Don't touch him", Erin said, her voice just a mere whisper.

"Erin, I-"

"You have no right to hurt him", she said, her eyes fixed on some random spot on the ground, hands still shaking.

"I'm supposed to hold you like that", Oliver said quietly, his voice breaking. He was. He really was supposed to.

"But you weren't there", Erin said and as soon as her eyes met his, tears started rolling down her face again. "You weren't there because apparently you had better things to do. Or better women to be specific."

"Erin, it's not like that, I-"

"He was there, Oliver! You weren't there and he was, so, you have no right to touch him." Erin felt a new panic attack rise. She had to get out of there.

"You weren't there", she whispered before running off. And Oliver didn't follow her.

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