Faded

Chapter 8

It's been weeks since Brandon came home from the hell hole that was Charles. The guilt and disgust he feels is driving him insane. As he holds her now in his arms, peacefully asleep, he thought about how he should tell her the truth.

After all, he had never meant for it to happen. God, he could barely remember it, for fuck's sake. One second they were drinking, next thing he knew it was the crack of dawn and her body was draped on his it had a strange familiarity to it. His heart rate picked up his stomach flipping remembering waking up next to Cassie instead of her. It had been weeks since that happened but his guilt still rattled him as if he had just left Cassie's bed.

He had been trying to tell her, but each time, he'd chicken out. Brandon would get the first word in saying,

"Sky, I have something to tell you."

"There is something you should know."

"I've been meaning to tell you-"

But then she would look up at him with such a hopeful, loving stare and the words would just die down in his mouth and burn his throat like acid he'd opt for another truth, one he can very much say.

"You're the greatest thing that's ever fucking happened to me."

"I don't know how my life would turn out without you, Skyler."

"You're my world. You know that, right?"

He'll kiss her as if it's the last time he'll ever get to, a part of Brandon's mind knows the truth, knows that any moment could be the last. He blinks away the tears that had welled up in his eyes. Watching her in her slumber, trusting and unknowing, oh how his heart is racing. Dammit, the truth would kill Skyler. Brandon so desperately buries his nose in her hair in an attempt to calm himself. 'I can't lose you. I can't.' His jaw clenched as he held her closer.

Unbeknownst to Brandon she stirred awake in his arms feeling his hold around her got tighter. Trying to keep her breathing even she noticed he has been like this since he came back. It's very unlike him to have a hard time sleeping after a long day at work. He usually passes out right after hitting the bed.

After a while, Brandon's lips press on the top of her head soon enough, slipping into slumber. His arm over her hip growing heavier, his breath slipping into deep ones. But now, she's the one wide awake as her mind takes her to a places dreaded.

Brandon came home like he's a changed person. Like this Brandon is a different version of himself. His kisses became more frequent, his touches seem needier, his gazes linger a little longer than you're used to. Anybody would be happy if their partner becomes like this, right? But something just feels off, something about his actions and that look in his eyes makes me, nervous.

The following morning, I woke up to the shower running. Sitting up and stretching, I was about to get up from the bed when Brandon's phone buzzed. Thinking nothing of it at first I took a second glance but then, I saw that it was from an unregistered number.

Unknown: We need to talk..

Was all that was shown on the display screen, i'm unsure why this suddenly made me think of Cassie. No, I told myself. Stop it. I took a deep breath putting on a robe. Making my way out of the room when Brandon stepped out the bathroom.

Hesitating for a bit, glancing at his phone then back to him. "I think someone texted you." I try to say as casual as I can without showing how nervous I was, flashing him a thin lipped smile before stepping out of the bedroom. I know Brandon. He'll tell me about this if I need to know about it. Besides, it could be nothing. It could be someone from work, maybe about the case or a new client. He wouldn't hide anything from me, it would be unlike him to start hiding anything now. Shaking my head hoping it would rid me of my ridiculous thoughts.

Over breakfast Brandon was, again, uncharacteristically quiet. Bouncing his knee, which is something he usually does when he's close to losing it. Frowning I walked over to him but he barely even noticed. Not until I started praying his arm off of the table to sit in his lap. Brandon wets his lips, his hands going around me. Staring up at him, trying to figure out why he has been acting this way. Is it PTSD? What happened to him? What is he not telling me? Brandon stares back but it's as if he's having a hard time meeting my gaze.

"Hey," I say softly, holding his face. "What's wrong, Baby?" Raking my fingers through his hair I noticed the bags under his eyes. Its like it's taking everything in Brandon to keep himself from unraveling. He looks in her eyes wanting so bad to tell the truth, to start begging on his knees for forgiveness, to plead with her looking past this and give him another chance to remain in her life. But things are even more complicated now.

As soon as she walked out of the bedroom earlier to prepare breakfast, he picked up the phone seeing the text on his phone. He immediately knows it's bad news. Brandon rings the unregistered number hearing Cassie sniffling on the other line.

"I know you don't want to talk to me or see me but.. Brandon, I-I'm pregnant."

Suddenly, everything went quiet and he can feel the life he dreamed of fading into oblivion.