C H A P T E R 20

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[20]

P H O E N I X
(4th oldest biological brother)

"Stop whining already! You're giving me a headache!" I groaned while Warren continued complaining about how painful a dog bite was.

"Were you the one bitten by a freaking dog or me?" he deadpanned.

"Whatever," I grumbled and got lost in my thoughts, which was a very dangerous thing to happen.

That look in Alaska's eyes was still stuck in my mind. The way she looked at us with so much disgust and hatred, and the way her eyes looked so dull and lifeless, was killing me. I know we fucking messed up. More than that even. We broke her. Beyond repair, to be exact. We abandoned, bullied and even hurt her physically. We were the worst brothers on earth. We couldn't even be considered brothers. We didn't deserve her nor did she deserve the pain she went trough due to us.

I didn't want her to move in with those two dimwits, but I knew it would be the best for her and I couldn't change her mind anyway. Those two guys were there for her when we weren't. They cared for her and protected her, which I will forever be grateful for although they were assholes.

The last few days I was only sitting around in my room, listening to music and drowning myself in some alcohol. My mother was a lying and manipulative bitch and I didn't even know. I just believed her. I believed her every lie and fake smile. Her every soothing word. Her fake love.

I was so stupid. Why didn't I notice it? Why did she want to get rid of my baby sister so badly anyway? Also, when my mother was capable of stabbing herself and drugging her own daughter, then what else was she capable of? Did she hurt Alaska before without our knowledge?

"Dinner's ready!" my father yelled from downstairs, whereupon I soon heard shuffling and a trempade of footsteps behind my closed door.

So, I stood up and slipped trough the door to be greeted by a ball flying into my direction and hitting the side of my head. I groaned in pain as I held my hand to my throbbing head and glanced into the direction of where the ball came from. There standing was Grayson who was nervously scratching the back of his head.

"You stupid id-!" I shouted but cut myself off when the pounding in my head became worse. I showed him the middle finger and walked down the stairs.

Everybody was already seated, except me and Grayson. They all weren't really paying attention to anything and just either stared into space or scrolled on their phones. I quickly placed my butt on the chair right next to Flynn and sent a brief nod to my stepmother who was smiling sadly at me.

She had returned in the morning and dad told her about what had happened. She didn't talk to neither of us since. She knew that we were kind of bullying Alaska but she didn't know to what extent we bullied our sister. She was angry at us but mostly af herself for not noticing it earlier.

Anyway, after a few minutes of tense silence Grayson strutted into the kitchen and sat down next to his twin brother.

Dad finally looked up from his phone and cleared his throat to get our attention. Everyone put their phones away and nodded at him as a sign that they were listening.

"Guys, I wanted to apologize," he declared, shocking all of us and making us almost fall out of our chairs. This guy never apologized. He didn't apologize when he made a mistake. Hell, he didn't even apologize when he once raised his voice in front of Mila.

"What for?" Dylan asked hesitantly, like he was afraid of the answer, which was quite impossible since he was scared of nothing. He was a dangerous and very strict person. He could destroy someone's life without doing anything. Just one look of him made others cower in fear and his name sent chills down their spines.

"I wanted to apologize for being such a bad father. I know I should've paid more attention to you guys. I should've been there for you when you had nightmares and stuff but I never quite knew how to after everything that happened. I was afraid to show anyone how much I love you guys, because I didn't want them to use you against me." He said it all in one breath and his eyes showed a whole bunch of emotions. Sincerity, sadness, guilt, regret. They were all swirling around in his eyes, full on display for us to see.

I was shocked would be an understatement. He wasn't the best and most caring father, yes, but he wasn't the worst either. Before the incident he always cared for us, soothed us after nightmares, made us pancakes and stuff. But afterwards, he avoided us. He drowned himself in work and alcohol so we were left alone with our oldest brother who raised us.

"Dad, why are you telling us this?" Flynn asked slowly.

"I know that I fucked up with Alaska and I didn't want another one of my children to hate me without me trying to fix it. I want her back. I want my little princess back in my life but I have no idea how to make up for all the things I did. I fucking believed that psycho of a wife and accused my innocent daughter of stabbing her own mother. I was so blinded by love and anger. I was so stupid," he spoke barely above a whisper, his voice on the verge of cracking.

Tears were threatening to spill yet again. It was the third time today that he had tears in his eyes. Everytime he thought about Alaska he got emotional. We saw more of his emotions in the past few days then in the the past couple of years. She meant the world to him but the problem was that be only realized that now.

"We will get her back, right?" he asked.

We all stiffened as tears welled up in our eyes as well. We fucking treated her like trash. Leonardo and Enzo even fucking sexually assaulted her, well their friends, but they didn't do anything so it was the same.

She won't just forgive us, maybe she never will, but I won't give up on at least trying to win her back. I won't give up on seeing that beautiful smile on her face just one more time or on hearing that wonderful sound of her laughter again.

I won't give up on loving her . . .

. . . until the day I die.


Hey there, I finally got to write a new chap! Yay! I hole you enjoyed Phoneix's POV and I also hope you guys didn't curse too much.

^^
I know how much you hate this family 😉😂

By the way, there will be another chapter today.

Stay safe! Love y'all!

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