Shalnark x Reader Oneshots 💜💛💜 [Might Not Be Writing Again]

💔 I Care☁️ |Shalnarkxsuicidalreader|

I swear I only write during 12-5 am and during my classes. Bc k never and I mean NEVER write in between. And did I read through this? No because I hate what I write half the time making it hard for me to like it but besides that enjoy the story!

This chapter contains: angst and fluff

Thank you for requesting: 0r4ng33

🛑🛑🛑!Disclaimer!🛑🛑🛑

Tw: depression, cutting, suicide attempts! If you are triggered by these please dont read this chapter!!!

~Y/ns POV~

Cold...

A soft breeze goes by...

I'm cold...

The sun is starting to set since it's late fall. I'm on the schools rooftop starring at the tiny students and teachers exiting below. I envied most of them. The teachers for never helping me when I tried talking and telling them about my problems. They simple said 'you'll be fine stop being so dramatic'

Empty...

My stomach grumbles from not treating in a while...

I feel empty...

The popular girls. I dont look like them and they make it obvious. They would always tease me for being different from them.

Lonely...

A few birds circle overhead...

I'm lonely...

The popular boys. They only used me.
They just saw me as a toy, a puppet, another play thing just to mess for a while then get rid of.

Hurts...

The school buses start leaving the school...

It hurts...

My parents. They never cared about me. They only pressured me to get perfect grades then if I didnt they put me down and say how much of a disappointment and how useless I was. Maybe their right...

Am I really this useless..? I sigh heavily. I look over the edge again. Nobody was exiting again everyone's already gone home for the day. It's the perfect time.

I love over to the park that's somewhat visible from where I'm standing. I used to run away there when my parents got to much to handle.

I stare at the children and their loving parents. I wish I had that kind of childhood.

I set my bag down next to me and take out a note pad. I had already wrote my suicide note since I've been contemplating this for months noise place the note next to my bag. I slip my jacket off and take out my pocket knife. I roll up my sleeves for a final time and stare at them. So many scares old and new. I flip open the pocket knife and press it against my fragile skin.

Dragging the sharp blade across my arm a thick line of blood appears. I do this multiple times let's out all my frustrations a final time in deep cutting.

I set I carefully it next to my bag too then I slip off my shoes and set them next to my bag too. I climb onto the railing and stare down at the sidewalk below letting a few tears slide down my checks.

I dont understand why I'm crying I've been anticipating this moment for the longest time now. All the pain all the suffer can end.

I take one final deep breath and take one foot off the edge. "Y/N STOP!" someone scream. I felt whoever wrap their waists around my fragile waist and yank me from the edge.

We both collide with the rooftop and I start sobbing. I felt whoever it is wrap their arms around me and pull me into their chest.

"Shh.. sh... it's okay its okay..!" The voice said. It was very familiar and I knew exactly who it was. It was Shalnark Ryuseih. The one person who was always nice to me. The one person guy that never broke my heart. The one guy who helped me with my family.

I felt his grip tighten around my body. "Do ever scare me like that again..." he said softly while rubbing my head.

I look up at him with teary eyes. "W..why? Why were you trying to do that?" He asked while cuping my checks.

"I-I.. because I'm useless!" I choke out trying to turn away from him but it was no use. "Y/n no you're not you're special and dont deserve to suffer I like this! I love and I care about you Y/n!" He said forcing me to look at him.

My eyes widen a bit. "Y-you love me..?" I said weakly. "Y/n of course I do! I love you more then words can Express! And it hurts me that your in pain... please dont do this you're worth so much and I cant bare to lose you!" He cried out

"Shal..." I'm at a lost for words. Was my best friend really confessing to me? Am I really that dense not to know? If I would have known I would have done this... I want to hurt him...

"I.. I'm sorry..." I sigh out quietly. "Its okay dont worry.. let's go get you wrapped up. And your staying at my house for awhile because I know part of this has to be family issues." He said while helping me up.

Shal looked down at my worried face again and wiped my tears. He smiled softly and kissed my forehead. "I love you so much..." he said before taking my hand, grabbing my stuff, and exiting the rooftop.

~

It's been a month since the rooftop incident. I've started living with Shalnark and were now happily dating. :)

Word Count: 941

I totally didnt just burn myself for the second time tonight hehehehe...
But atleast I have a nice smelling candle going! And please dont do anything to hurt yourself it's not worth it and I promise itll get better in the future -Love Anzu 💜💛💜