you're staring. - tommyinnit

☁︎︎ 𝗵𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗶𝗻 𝘂𝗻𝗹𝗼𝘃𝗲𝗮𝗯𝗹𝗲 𝗵𝗮𝗻𝗱 ☁︎︎

a/n: bold will b yelling bc i feel like caps is rlly aggressive. chapter is out so soon bc of @cadarino i love u

cw: actual panic attack and also yelling wooooo

"tubbo. what the fuck are you doing?"

i feel the tears start down my cheeks as tommy steps into the room and slams the door shut behind him.

i watch as tubbo backs away from me to face him, tears also starting down his face.

i glance between the two. tommy's face twists up angrily.

"you son of a bitch." tommy yells. i flinch back into the wall, raising my hands up to my ears to cover them gently.

"i'm the bitch?" tubbo responds, somehow keeping his cool despite the tears falling from his jawline onto the front of his shirt. "tommy you knew how i felt from day fucking one." he shouts, the hurt in his voice beginning to shine through.

tommy steps forward, starting to get in tubbo's face, "you liar." he hisses, raising his eyebrow. "you told me she was your best friend. and that you loved her very much."

"do you not see the way i act around her?" he responds, his hands beginning to shake. "you've seen everything. the way we cuddle, the way we hug, the way we work" he says, pointing at the taller boy.

i begin to quiver as well, my heart becoming audible through my ears as i interject. "toby you're my best friend- i thought it was just a friend thing.."

"you shut up cassidy." he responds coldly, and i flinch. he'd never told me to shut up before. i sink down against the wall, burying my head in my hands and waiting for the yelling to stop. i feel my entire body burn and shake.

"don't you fucking speak to her like that." tommy screams. i hear toby scoff.

"speak to her like what tommy? like she just kissed my other best friend, knowing how i felt about her?" he says, his voice beginning to raise once more.

i slam my hands down against the hardwood floor, standing up and facing the boys. i feel my face grow warm, my entire body threatens to collapse under me from all of my shaking.

"if i knew how you felt i wouldn't have kissed him." i exclaim, glaring at him. "i was high, toby. i dont even remember kissing him. why can't you just communicate properly?" i shout, choking through my sobs.

i watch toby step toward me, his face becoming gentler as he approaches me.

"don't fucking touch me" i screech, pushing him off of me and leaving the room, slamming the door behind me. i hear toby call my name, only to be interrupted by more yelling from tommy.

-

i sprint down the stairs, the tears blurring my vision. "wilbur??" i yell down the hallway, being met by his concerned stare poking out from the living room entrance. i point towards the door, and with an immediate look of understanding he rushes to another room, where all of our bags sat, and grabbed both mine and his.

i rush to the kitchen, writing a hurried note in pen on a napkin.

-

gone with wilbur. be back by tmrw morning for last day of trip. tubbo, tommy, if this isn't figured out by the time we are back, i'm going home.

i write.

i tap the pen against my teeth, deciding against writing an i love you to either of the boys. instead i scribble down my name and slam it against the counter.

i follow wilbur out the door and into his car. i notice niki hadn't gotten back yet. surely wilbur will call her, i think. opening the passenger side and hopping in, buckling myself up and plugging my phone into the aux. shuffling my playlist and setting down my phone.

wilbur climbs into the driver seat a moment later, he was already on the phone with niki, just as i had suspected.

"yes, yes. we will be there soon. love you too." he says, hanging up and starting the car. he opens all the windows, reaching his hand across the center console and taking mine gently. i begin to sob at the touch, and he gives me an understanding stare, unbuckling and leaning over to give me a tight hug. i cry into his shoulder for a moment, my arms wrapping around him and clutching his shirt.

that was the good thing about wilbur. he always knew just what to do. he was like the best older brother i could've asked for.

after a few moments i manage out a soft whisper. "drive." i ask, my voice cracking slightly.

i feel him nod, adjusting himself back into his seat and buckling up. he pulls out of the driveway, starting the GPS to take us to what i assumed was cooper, travis, noah, techno, and minx's airBNB.

he speeds down the road, the music blasting through the old speakers of his dash.

i am drowning.

"scream!" i hear him yell over the loudness of "no children" by the mountain goats.

there is no sign of land.

"what??" i yell back, turning to him.

you are coming down with me,

"you heard me! he laughs, "scream! it'll make you feel better" he says.
and so i do. i tip my head back and i scream, as loud as i can. i scream until my throat hurts, and it rasps when i speak. i scream until i'm sure the passerby on the sidewalk heard me. i scream until i'm gasping for breath. and it makes me feel better.

hand in unloveable hand.

he follows suit, screaming with me. it hurts my ears, but surely, it works.

-

wilbur pulls into the lot for the airbnb not too long after i go quiet, my throat all sorts of sore from wil and i's screaming match. he shuts off the car, reaching into the back and grabbing our bags before stepping out.

i do the same, hopping down from the car and letting the night air hit me. i relish in the cold for a moment before following wil to the front door. he opens without knocking, and sets our bags down by the stairs.

the scene we are met with is quite the change from our own airbnb. the boys, minx, and niki are gathered on the couch, playing clue and laughing their asses off as they all crack jokes. music echoes through the living room quietly. they all turn to us, bright smiles plastered on their faces.

"alright fellas, we are starting a game of secret hitler. it was noah in the bathroom with the shoe by the way." cooper says, taking everyone's cards and starting to pack them away.

wilbur and i plop down beside niki and minx. niki wraps me tightly in a hug for a moment before giving me a pat on the shoulder. i smile, taking a seat beside minx and taking my card.

"hey minx" i whisper, and she turns to me, already seeming to see what i mean.

"fascist?" she whispers leaning toward me.

"hitler." i whisper back, and she nods, sporting a mischievous grin.

-

we end the night with everyone leaning back into the couch. somebody starts a movie, but nobody really pays attention. i rest my head on minx's lap. she plays with my hair gently as we both drift off. i sigh one last time before i fall out of consciousness, stretching out my legs and resting them on techno's lap.

_

gm how r we feeling!! tysm for all the love for this story recently :D love u all!! kisses!!