Blessant (GirlxGirl. Lesbian story)

Part 1.

'Why do I live?' I asked myself in my head, around the jumbled racing thoughts, as I stood in front of the mirror in my sports bra and underwear. I just came from the gym after work, trying to work off the stress and fat, disgusted by my body. Sweat drips off my toned, tanned stomach. My 6'1 figure filling the mirror. I look at my arms, my half sleeves on both arms of different patterns and characters, the fresh cuts, glistening like rose gold in the light on my wrists. I look at my face and cringe slightly. Large, cold and empty hazel eyes, small button nose, skinny cheek bones, sharp jaw, full pink lips. My dark, short hair sits on my shoulders, curly from the steam from the shower filling the bathroom. I frown and touch my stomach slightly like it was glass, my hand flinching back as if it was burned. Angry tears prickle in my eyes and I close them, breathing slowly. They still don't fall. I grit my teeth, just wishing one tear will fall from my eyes. Just one. I crave the warm trail it leaves as it drips off my chin, hitting a surface or the back of my hand. But it won't come out. The frozen tears let me suffer with this empty, numb but overwhelming feeling while my thoughts and the voices bounce through my brain and songs that I hate repeat in my head like a broken record. I have no control over my body or my mind. I fist my hands, my nails digging into my palm. Nothing.

I groaned and hopped in the shower, the hot water touching my tense muscles. It feels good for a moment. I soap up and wash and scrub my skin until it's red. I hop out the shower and wrap my towel around me. I walk to my room and dry myself then threw my undergarments on, then put on a long sleeve dress with an open back on. I slip my feet in my black pumps and curl my hair. I throw on a little makeup and grab my phone, walking to the cab from my apartment.

I'm currently headed to one of New York's finest bars called Silver Moon. It's a gay bar. I go every Friday after a work out at the gym to try and get laid. And drunk. The bartender, Edward, knows me personally from a few years back. I walk into the bar, toward the counter and plop down on one of the seats.
"Ah, Annamarie, what can I get you tonight?" He asked, his thick Italian accent silky on his pink tongue. His blue eyes dance with his bisexual needs. I smirk and say the usual. He soon comes back with a chocolatey mud slide for me. I sip my drink, looking at my phone. A text from my mother.

'Call me when you get a chance.' It reads. I closed my phone, a sudden irritation running in my body as my head pounds against my skull. Don't get it wrong. I love my mother, or at least I try to. But love to me is just a buzz. Just like any other feeling.

I stare at my mudslide before taking another sip as I think about my family. My mother is Puerto rican but was born in Brooklyn, New York. She was put up for adoption at ten and luckily she found a loving family to take care of her until she was old enough to take care of herself. Then she met my father. I blanched just from the thought of him. He's an African American and Dominican man who fell in love with my mother. They had my older sister, then me two years later. My parents have been together for almost forty years and nothing can tear them apart. Well, so it seems. I look up and see Edward staring at me with concern, his blonde eyebrows pushed together.
"You okay?" He asked. I nodded.
Lie. I'm never okay.
I drink the rest of my mudslide and ask for a scotch. I down it quickly, starting to feel a familiar buzz. I asked for one more and downed it before walking outside. I lit a cigarette and dialed my moms number.
"Hello?" I hear her.
"Hi, mother. You told me to call you?" I asked, the irritation growing.
"What you doin?" She asked, her city accent thick.
"I'm out. Why?" I blow smoke from my lips. It burns, slightly.
"Your family misses you, mija. We want to visit you, Ann. It's been two years." She sighs. I swallow hard, the cigarette burning my finger as the cloudy grey ash falls against my ring finger.
"Come visit in a month or two. I still have to fix the apartment up." I lie. I can't see them right now.
"Your father can have a look at what's bothering your pipes, love." She gives me a knowing tone. The word father sticks in my head, clogging my throat.
"It's fine." I breathe.
"I don't want to keep you too long but just we're gonna visit you whether you like it or not. We miss you, especially your father." She huffs. I hear her speaking Spanish on the other side and I wait, closing my eyes. The word father just echoes in my brain.
"I love you, my daughter." I can hear his smile in his voice and my stomach twist and turns like a tornado ready to strike.
"You too." I push out. I hang up and flick my cigarette when i feel someone touch my shoulder.
"Do you have another?" A sweet voice asks. I turn and stare for a moment, random buzzing running in my body. She's at least five seven, taking height off the heels that cause her to be eye to eye to me. Her skin is pale. Her eyes are almond shaped, a silver-bluish. So unique. Her little nose is small. Her lips are pink and pouty. Her hair is long and blonde, up to her elbows. Her legs are long and pale, as I imagine them wrapped around my shoulders as I taste her pussy. I look back at her face and she's staring through her lashes.
"Yes here." I give her a cigarette and she lights it, leaning against the brick wall next to me. I light another, smoking with her.
"What's your name?" She asked after a while.
"Annamarie Vargas. You?" I ask afterward, exhaling the bittersweet toxins from the cigarette.
"Kathleen Lara." She sniffs, blowing smoke in the air. I stared at her for a moment before turning my face toward the sky. The moon is full.
"You know, I saw you on the phone and not once did you smile." I feel her eyes on me as her milky, gorgeous and smooth voice filled my ears. It isn't too deep and it isn't too high pitched. It's slightly raspy, as if she has asthma but it's cute. I look at her.
"Is one even truly happy anymore?" I ask her, staring her in her empty eyes.
"Happiness is figurative. I'm happy cause of me, doesn't matter where I'm living." She quotes from the neighborhoods West Coast. I smile and chuckle, turning my face away.
"You have a beautiful smile. Kind of like Shane from the L word. Except you have dimples. You should show it more." Kathleen suggested. I looked at her, her face empty again.
"Show yours. Then maybe I'll reconsider." I slip with a sly tone, my face blank again.
"Make me smile." She whispers.
"You're beautiful."
"Don't lie. I've heard it before." She rolls her eyes, flashing a fake smile. She has straight pearly white teeth. Dimples on her cheeks.
"Who said I was lying?" I asked her.
"Your eyes. They're pretty, but empty." She changes the subject.
"Yours are empty, too." I look away.
"I have a reason for my lingering unhappiness." She sighs. Why is she telling me this?
"And I don't?" I spit, looking at her. She doesn't even flinch.
"You do. But I don't know what it is. Let's go get a drink." She moves in front of me grabbing my hand. Energy runs through my body as her long fingers twined with mine. I walked behind her, staring at her plump bottom, desire filling my brain. We sit at a stool and I ask Edward for a martini as she does too, then turn to face her.
"So, Annamarie. That's a beautiful name. It fits you." Kathleen smirks slightly, but it disappeared as fast as it came.
"You think I'm beautiful?" I ask, sipping my drink.
"Godly, really."
"Shut up." I feel my face heat up and I looked away.
"You say shut up a lot. It's cute." She laughs slightly.
"You're blunt with your opinions." I look up at her. She stares at me for a while and I stared back.
"Do you have any pets?" She asked afterward.
"A king snake. You?" I asked. She smirked.
"A cat. Where do you work? If you work?"
"Bronx zoo. You?" I asked.
"A guidance counselor." She smirked.
"Funny. You say you have problems yet you help other people." I shook my head.
"No ones perfect." She answered. I nodded, eating the olive from my drink.
"True, but you're closer to perfect than most I've seen." I sigh. She smiles, tipping her drink toward me before drinking. I watched as her tongue poked out to catch the olive that rolled onto her tongue. She looked at me with a blank face, chewing slowly.
"What's your story?" Kathleen asked.
"Psychotic bipolar one. You?" I asked. I'm not shocked that I'm sharing my business with this girl. I've always had a big mouth with strangers.
"Psychotic depression." That beautiful, manic smile of hers paints her face again.
"This is a cruel world. Such a pretty girl like you shouldn't have such a thing." I smirked.
"Shit happens." She sighs, looking around the room. This place is beautiful. Girls sit on couches on one side as others dance to the music playing here. The lights are dimmed, the golden walls pounding with the music.
"Great advice, counselor." I snorted. She laughed.
"You're so funny. And sassy." She stared at my face. I stared back.
"Let's dance." She says after a while of an intense staring contest. She grabs my hand and we go to the center of the room in between the bodies of other girls. On & On by Erykah badu started. I laid my hands on her hips as hers wrapped around my neck. We swayed to the beat as my fingers moved in circles on her waist. I bent and put my lips on her neck, taking in her taste and smell. Japanese cherry blossom with kamikaze thoughts and a bit of child's play. Perfect.
"You smell so good." I whispered in her ear as Closer by Nine Inch Nails came on. I twisted her around so our arms were wrapped around her waist as her back is against my front. She grinds against me, her plump rear on my core.
"You know if this is your attempt to seduce me, it's working." She moaned as I kissed her neck, slowly. I twisted her back around and continued to sway back and forth as she laid her head on my shoulder. Then the song changed to Meg Meyers desire remix and the lights turned off completely, except for the strobe lights. She started to dance on me and singing the lyrics in my ear.
"Baby I wanna fuck you. I want to feel you in my bones... I wanna tear into your soul." She whispered, her voice heavy with raw desire. She nibbled on my ear and I looked at her when she pulled back. Her eyes are wide, manic. The blood in my body pulsates. My veins explode with fireworks like on the Fourth of July. The way the brooklyn and Manhattan streets sound on Labor Day. The excitement and vibrations run, run, run through my body.
"Im gonna call a cab." I whispered in her ear. She nodded, her twisted, sexy smile on her perfect face as her pained but jumping eyes gleam with passion and lust. I walk to the bathroom and call the cab while peeing, then I wash my hands and stare at the mirror. My hair is wild from the moist atmosphere of the club. My eyes are big, burning a hole in the mirror.
"Don't fuck this up." I hiss to myself, then I walk out. She's sitting on the couch, her legs crossed. Her gold locks are wrapped around her as she looks up at me with an empty face, her eyes still manic but low from the lust. She opens her arms to me and I'm in them with a dash.
"You know, I never thought I could ever feel so much emotion before but tonight changed that a little. Just a little. It's a buzzing that is so hard to ignore and I can't wait for that buzzing to be pure passion as your tongue is dancing on my skin and your fingers tracing my body." She whispered, biting my ear. She's magnificent.
"You're beautiful." Is all I can push out.
"Prove it." She looked up at me through her lashes. I looked at her and leaned forward, wondering what her lips will tell mine, but she leaned back, smirking.
"Your cab is here." She looked down. I didn't realize my phone was vibrating. I stood up from between her legs and took her hand, helping her up. We walked hand in hand to the cab and hopped in the back seat. She turned toward me as the cab drove away and stared at me, her strawberry lips tempting me for a taste. She leaned toward me and her lips slowly touched mine, giving me a sexy peck, pulling my lower lip in between her teeth. She let it go and it fell back into place. Kathleen looked at me and smirked that sinister smirk that can charm someone in seconds. I leaned and kissed her, my eyes fluttering close as her tongue slipped in my mouth. She tastes so good. A guilty pleasure in her mouth. Our tongues danced and grazed as we stayed like this. She pulled away and licked my lips slowly and I pecked the tip of her tongue and grazed mine over it. She pulled away and licked her own lips.
"I already love the way your lips move on mine, crazy girl. I can't wait to feel them on my pussy." She whispered in my ear, loud enough for the cab driver to hear. The car swerved a bit and I snickered, then slowly licked the column of her neck. She moaned.
"You sure you're ready for that, counselor? I don't think you should love something you just got a hint of. Good advice-" I pecked her lips and continued.
"Or no?" I smirked. She kissed me again and bit my lip, hard. I moaned.
"Don't be smart with me." She responded, lust evident in her voice. I took my hand and put it on her thigh, rubbing smooth circles as I waited for us to reach my apartment.
We soon reached my home and I threw a twenty at the driver and pulled Kathleen out the car.
"Oh wow, Annamarie, you're strong." She giggled, her cheeks flushed. I smirked, kissing her cheeks. We walked into the elevator and she kissed me on the neck.
"You have a beautiful skin tone." She sighed.
"Shut up." I smiled. She chuckled and the door opened. We walked to my apartment and I unlocked the door, pulling her in and pushing her against it. I started to kiss her neck, sucking on her pulse point. She let out a moan.
"Where's your snake? What's his name?" She moaned out as I bit down on her neck.
"His name is stinger. He's in my room in his tank." I bit on her ear lobe. She pulled me to her face and we kissed passionately, but then I pulled back.
"Do you want some wine?" I asked her. Kathleen shook her head, biting her lip.
"I want you. And your snake." She smirked. I took her hand and guided her to my bedroom. My room was painted a light brown color with a white carpet on the floor. I hate wooden floors. There's a four post master bed for my tall figure against the wall closest to the door. My bookshelves filled with books in the right side of the room with my large snake tank sitting on top of them. Stinger sits in his tank, slithering and sliding around like the serpent he is. I remove my shoes as Kathleen did and put them in the corner. I kissed her, sliding my tongue back into her mouth, slowly. She moaned, and pushed my head away from her, removing her dress. It pooled at her feet. Her breasts sit up, perky, big and erect waiting to be touched. Her stomach is soft, her thighs are thick and just waiting to be wrapped around me as I fuck her.
"God, you're so fucking perfect." I moan. I take off my dress and stand in my bra and tommy boxers. A large bulge sits in there and her eyes widen, and her large smirk plants on her face.
"Do you have any more toys?" She asked, her eyes playful.
"Yes." I walked to my closet and pulled out a box filled with plugs and dildos. She pulls out a purple plug.
"Lay down on the bed." She demands. I licked my lips and did as she said. She came and kneeled between my legs and started to kiss my stomach. She licked the line between my abs and kissed the tattoo on my hip bone. I moaned as I felt myself becoming wet. she took the elastic of my boxers in between her teeth as she looked at me with those eyes of hers. She smiled her smile and pulled them down, exposing the plastic bulge as it bounces side to side. She pulled the strap to the side and kissed the inside of my thigh and took the plug, rubbing it on my clít. My hips bucked up.
"Kathleen." I moaned, my plump bottom lip between my teeth. She slid the plug into my entrance and I gasped, my head falling back against the bed. She fixed the dildo back on my hips and climbed up my body. She unhooked my bra and threw it across the room. She took my hands and guided them to her hips. I didn't realize she removed her underwear until I looked down and saw her bare, beautiful püssy.