Shadows of Ash and Gold

Chapter nineteen

Sormcav, 1872.
Everson.

Everson sat on the edge of a windowsill in the Sormcav castle. Sormcav had always interested him, the buildings were strange, ovaly looking, almost like circus tents. Everson had always been amused by their world, although he didn't mean to. He understood how tragic it was, how ruthlessly cruel their lives were but he couldn't find it in him to care. He hated that part of him, the selfish part, it was his worst flaw. In so many ways.

"I figured you would be out partying not sulking in the library," a gentle, but cheery, female voice said from behind him.

He whirled around to see his sister, he observed her, a smile starting on his face. He hadn't seen her in three years. Her hair was the same platinum blonde, the same as his, except a little shorter now. Her eyes were the same crystal blue as his.

He got up from his seat and pulled her to him, in a tight embrace. "Hey Ny."

She pulled away, keeping him at arm's length She smiled, it was full of brightness, and happiness, something he and Bash had worked so hard to keep there. They protected their sister from the horrids that they've experienced. He envied her. In more ways than one, but he would rather take the pain then inflict it on her. "Hey Ever."

"What took you so long to get here?"

"Long story, it's Octavious' fault."

"He's here?" Ever asked, his emotions dropping. He hoped Nyan didn't notice the drop in his tone.

Nyan's bright eyes narrowed. She somehow could always sense the change in someone's mood. "What's going on between you two?"

Ever swallowed. "What do you mean?"

"Did you guys get into a fight? He got all weird when I mentioned your name earlier."

"I don't want to talk about it." his voice was stern and maybe a little harsh because he saw her flinch a bit. But it wasn't like he could tell her the truth. He could never tell anyone the truth. He could never say the words out loud. If he did, it confirmed what a terrible person he was.

Nyan shook the hurt from her eyes and replaced it with one of her magical bright smiles that just made you want to smile too. It was truly a gift of hers, because he felt his lips inch upwards. "Fine, I just thought it would be nice if we could have one family dinner without any conflict. It's Mara's birthday, so whatever you said to him, Everson, fix it. Please."

"What makes you think I'm the one that said something?" Ever scoffed.

She gave him a pointed look.

"Okay fine so maybe it was me, but he said some mean things back."

"I don't care Ever, we haven't seen each other in three years so please get your head out of your ass and apologize," she demanded then turned on her heels, her big dress brushing with her, and pranced out of the room.

Everson felt happy all the time. He felt happy when he consumed more alcohol than he should, he felt happy when he kissed and screwed random people, he felt happy when he did reckless things that made him forget who he truly was, what he truly wanted. But that happiness only lasted temporarily. It was a temporary distraction that easily got boring.
But this, he thought. This happiness was forever.