♡ Dark Paradise ♡ ; newtmas fanfic.

t h i n k i n g

I couldn't help but feeling nervous to tell the others about Newt and I. Although, not as nervous as I was telling Newt about my feelings for him.
I know that I shouldn't be scared. It shouldn't matter what they think. I have Newt, and I know Teresa will support us, so that's all that really matters, right?
Newt and I left my house this morning, walking side-by-side down the street, to the Breakfast tent.
"Tommy," Newt said suddenly, "the other day, when I asked you if you had anyone in mind to date, and you said maybe, were you talking about me?"
I bit my lip awkwardly and looked at the blue sky above me. "Um, was it obvious?"
"No, I actually felt quite jealous," Newt laughed, grabbing my hand. We swung our hands in sync as we walked, not caring who seen us. All of my nervous thoughts just seemed to disapear from my mind when he touched me.
"Newt? Can we tell Teresa first?" I asked, kicking a stone across the sidewalk. We were so close to the Breakfast tent, I could smell the scent of cooking food.
"Okay," said Newt, "but why her?"
"Well . . She was the first person that I told about my feelings for you, and she's the only one that knows so far . . She dared us to kiss because she said she knew I liked you."
"That Shuckface!" Newt laughed, "well, let's get food then sit down. She'll find us."

-
Newt was right.
She did find us.
Newt and I sat down at the same table as yesterday, eating our food. Pancakes; which may I add, tasted much better than the food from yesterday did.
Teresa came over and sat down across from us, with her plate stacked full with syrup covered pancakes.
"Good mornin', Teresa." Newt said, looking at me confidently.
"Hey," she replied.
Underneath of the table, I grabbed Newt's hand, tangling my fingers with his, and casually slipped our intertwined hands on top of the table.
Teresa looked up from her plate, seen our hands, and smirked.
"I knew this would happen!" Teresa laughed, clapping her hands together. "Aw, so tell me how it happened. Who else knows?"
"You're the only one who knows so far," I said quietly. "I just wanted you to know, okay? Stop being so bloody mushy-gushy about it!"
"Fine . . Fine . . Want help telling the others?" She asked, wiping a glob of syrup off of her face.
"I think Tommy and I can do it just fine on our own," said Newt, smiling. "Thanks."
-
So now Teresa knew.
I was aware that I couldn't keep Newt and I a secret for much longer; we had to tell our friends. But the nerves had caught up with me, and I could feel something churning in my stomach; bile rising in my dry throat.
I wondered what Newt was feeling. He didn't seem nervous, but then again, he was very good at hiding his feelings.
"Newt, I can't do this." I said, burying my sweaty face in my hands. "I just can't."
"Tommy, it'll be okay. They're our friends. They'll understand."
"How are you so sure?"
"Listen, you Shuck, I really like you. Even if the others don't support us, I'll still really like you," Newt rested his hand on my shoulder. "Teresa is still there for us, too, so what have we got to lose?"
"I just keep thinking of what could go wrong . ." I say, my voice breaking, a stupid tear rolling down my cheek.
"Thinking about it makes it worse," says Newt gently. "Nothing kills you more than your mind. Trust me, I know."
So I beileved him.
-
Ben, Chuck, Adam, Zart, Alby, Winston, and all of the other Gladers sat together under the tent, just talking and enjoying their lunch. Newt and I decided to wait until lunchtime to tell them, instead of breakfast, to give us some time to think of what we were going to say.
Newt and I walked up to their table, and sat down beside each other. "Hey," I greeted, nodding.
"Where were you shanks?" Chuck asked, talking with his mouth stuffed full of food.
"Yeah, we haven't seen either of you all day." Alby shrugged, "Teresa said she hasn't seen you guys, either."
I silently thanked Teresa inside of my mind, and looked at Newt. My body started to shake, and I couldn't help it. I felt like I was going to vomit.
I guess Newt could tell, because underneath the table he patted me on the knee. "Listen," says Newt to the gladers, "Tommy and I have got something we want to tell ya'."
The table goes silent, and all eyes are on us.
"Yeah," I croak, because that's all I can manage to say.
"We're together now," breathes Newt, "and if any of you shanks have got a bloody problem with it, we don't give a klunk."
Wide eyes are looking at us, waiting for me to say something.
"Yeah," I say again, because my head is pounding and my heart is thumping. My body is out of control.
"So, you Shuckface's gonna talk, or not?" Newt growls.
"Woah," Chuck says, breaking the silence of the Gladers, "I did not see that coming."