Chapter 60 | "i missed you"

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"Knock knock, can I come in?" Taeyong asked, peeking into her room.

"Come on in Tae, it's good to see you." She said, sitting up in her bed with a smile. Taeyong noticed that the color had come back to her face and her movements were more steady.

"We've missed you a lot Ji, I'm glad to see you're better." He said, bending down to hug her carefully. She winced slightly when she moved her arms, a slight pain in her ribs from the bones that were still healing.

"Yeah, sorry it took so long. I can't imagine what you've been dealing with, but from that I hear, you've been doing a great job." He smiled at her.

"Yeah it's been tough but-" he stood up, staring at her in confusion as he processed her words. "Wait, what do you mean by 'hear'" she slightly giggled at his confusion.

"You know, the most frustrating part of being in a coma was being able to hear everything you guys were saying but not being able to do anything about it? Also Taeyong, it's okay to cry you know. I know you always waited until everyone else was gone." She lightly nudged his shoulder causing him to roll his eyes.

"So I'm guessing you probably heard some.... interesting things." He says, eyeing her skeptically as he took a seat.

"Yeah, you could say that. Actually that's what I wanted to talk to you about."

"Well go on then." He urged, staring at her with intense interest.

"Jaehyun confessed to me." Taeyong's eyes widened in shock.

"That fucking coward couldn't even wait to tell you? He didn't even tell me that he was-"

"Wait Tae, it gets worse.."

"Worse??"

"Jeno did too." Taeyong's jaw drops.

"And Jaemin might've as well? He didn't outright but it sounded like he wanted to..."

"Um uhhh well uh..." Taeyong stares at her, lost for words. "What are you uh gonna do?"

"I don't know. What do I do?"

"Well do you feel anything for them?"

"I don't know honestly. For a while I've been feeling... strange, there's no other way to put it. Something in my heart is like missing? I guess?" She trailed off, unsure of how to articulate her thoughts.

"Keep going."

"No, nevermind, I don't even know what I'm saying." She says, waving her hand.

"No you talk this out. You would've never invited to me if you didn't want me to pry, you would've asked for Lucas to cheer you up instead so spill."

"I don't know what to do Taeyong. I can't get ahold of my emotions, I feel weird. It's just like I want something but I don't even know what that something is."

"Jihyun...have you ever thought that maybe you're ready to fall in love?"

"What?" She recoils, sitting up straighter and staring at Taeyong in complete confusion. "Love? Me? No."

"Thank about it, Ji. You're so focused all the time on running NCT and Jang Mafia, training these newbies and leading missions. You never have given yourself a break." Taeyong says, scooting closer to her.

"You literally take care of everyone and bear all your burdens alone. Don't you want someone to be there for you? Someone to stand by you through everything and take care of you for a change? Someone to love you like that?"

"But that's what you guys are. I love you guys and you love me too. This isn't a job for me. I'll always take care of family." She replies, still confused.

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