𝐀𝐧𝐝 𝐈

𝐓𝐖𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐘-𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐄

𝐂𝐨𝐫𝐚𝐥 𝐆𝐚𝐛𝐥𝐞𝐬, 𝐅𝐥𝐨𝐫𝐢𝐝𝐚
𝐊𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐥𝐞𝐲𝐚 𝐋𝐚𝐢𝐥𝐚 𝐓𝐡𝐨𝐦𝐚𝐬

Dear Diary,

I messed up. I messed up bad too. I moved on from Dawuan and found myself in Dejhari's arms. I don't know what my feelings mean right now but I know I want to be with him and for him. I know that because he's the only person who ever made me feel like I was normal. The only person who makes me feel like i'm like I'm just like everyone else. And plus, he hes funny and giving and respectful.

It doesn't make it no better than he can kiss so good and the way he eats the cooter is AMAZEBALLS. He laughs at my jokes...well what thinks are my jokes and he's very protective over me. He always has my best interest and supports me in everything I do. Which I appreciate.

I just didn't understand what I had until he cut things off with me for going out with another boy. I don't know. I wasn't thinking about his feelings when I went with King because I was still hurt about the fight that I had with that one girl. like ew.

She was so ghetto and openly disgusting. Like whore, don't put your hands on me. You hoe.

But yes, I wanna fix things with Dejhari but i don't know how and I don't know if it's going to be the same and that hurts the most. He's supposed to be mine and I'm making him think that I'm not his by going out with other guys.

I've started doing some problem solving though.

1. I stopped going out with the guys.
2. Treasure helped me block their numbers

Now I just have to figure out a way to make things right with Dejhari. I won't be giving him oral because I'm not on that level yet but maybe I can invite him over for a picnic? I think that'sl smart.

I closed my diary and started looking around my room for something else to do to pass time until my mom and Treasure get back. I don't know where they went but they have been spending a lot of time together.

Me and Laila laid in bed and watched television and laughed at Will Smiths funny ways. "I wish he was still this funny too Laila..." I said looking down at Laila.

"Grrr.." Laila said.

"I like this Will better too!" I said smiling at her, she moved around and started sleeping on her side.

"Ugh laila, you are no fun.." I fussed.

"I miss Dejhari so muchhh.." I whined with tears in my eyes, I laid down and rubbed Laila.

"You miss Dooda?" i asked, laila turned over and i chuckled a little at her small attitude.

"Girl I don't care, I miss him.." i said mugging her.