Surviving the McLane Boys ('On Hold Still...')

Chapter 15 - Camping Out with the McLane's. A Bundle of Surprises.

Chapter 15

 

 

"I know what you're thinking, what's Barney been drinking? That girl was smoking hot

Yes I coulda nailed her, but no it's not a failure, 'Cuz there's one thing she is not

To score a ten would be just fine, But I'd rather be dressed to the nines. It's a truth you can't refute, nothing suits me like a suit

Picture a world, where all the boys and girls, Are impeccably well dressed. That delivery guy
in the jacket and tie, that puppy in the double-breast.

That '80s dude in mutton chops, That baby with a lollipop, That lady cop who's kinda cute.
Nothing suits 'em like a suit

Wingman I can wear, They're oh so debonair, The perfect way to snare, a girl with daddy issues. In navy blue or black, Check out this perfect rack, I want to give them a squeeze

Oh really? Then answer these questions, If you please. What would you do if you had to choose, between your suits and a pot of gold?

Suits.

What would you say, if you gave your suits away, in return you'd never grow old?

Suits.

What would you pick, One million chicks, Or a single three-piece suit?

It's moot.

What if world peace, Were within your reach-

 

 

Abbadabada I'm gonna stop you right there. It's suits. Come on, Lily. Get your head out of your ass.

Two! Three! Four!

Girls will go and girls will come, But there's only one absolute, Every bro on the go needs to know, That there's no accepted substitute

I'm sorry suits, let's make amends, my Sunday best are my best friends, send casual Friday down the laundry chute.

'Cuz nothing suits the undisputed oft-saluted suitor of repute, Like a .... wait for it ...
Suit!

Then again, she is pretty hot."

"WOULD YOU SHUT THAT THING UP?!"

I jolt out of my blissful, pain free slumber to find Dylan standing over me holding my phone in my face. "Mdhfhwaaah?"

"Don't give me that crap." He holds the phone closer to my face, making me cross-eyed, "Turn your friggin phone off! It's been singing that stupid song all morning!"

I lazily swipe at the phone and roll over as it starts to play my favourite song from How I Met Your Mother again.

"Turn it off!" he demands again.

In response I start to sing the words at the top of my lungs. He's the reason why I've got a lump the size of a plum on my forehead. Let him suffer.

He stomps out in a huff and I roll out of bed with a huge grin on my face. I feel... happy.

I pull on some shorts, turn my alarm off and head downstairs in high spirits.

"Morning Sweetpea."

"Morning Cl-"

Claire screams. I jump back as she stares at me in horror, "Wh-what h-happened to your head?" she stutters.

I self-consciously cover it noticing Jakes pleading looks from the dining table, "Uh, I, uh, I had to get a drink of water last night and I didn't turn any of the lights on... and I, uh, walked into... a wall..."