Hateful Desire

Chapter 18

Draco

The rain is coming down heavy on the castle when I wake up. My mind recognizes the pain in my head that hasn't left since this summer. I turn to my side to grab my journal. I try to write as much as I can everyday so I don't forget anything. I know I need to keep these memories somewhere, for someone to find one day. I write usually until my fingers hurt.

The rain only grows louder and louder the more I write. As I finish, the sound of thunder breaks as I put my journal back on my nightstand. As I get up to get dressed I look at my reflection in the mirror, I look pale. Too pale.  My eyes are dark and my body is growing thinner. I really should be eating more, if only I could keep food down.

I change and walk down to the common room to find Theo and Blaise sitting alone talking with each other. I have been ignoring pretty much everyone for the past month. I haven't had any interest in school gossip or childish humor. Being with the people I associate with as "friends" don't really know me and I find them as an interference at this point. I know they don't actually care about what I have to say or do, so why should I?

"Malfoy, oye! Get over here mate!" I hear Theo yell from across the room.

"What is it?" My voice is annoyed.

"Bloody hell, you look absolutely awful." He says looking at me with wide eyes.

"If that is all then, I will be on my way now." I nod turning away from him about to leave.

"Wait, Malfoy. Get your arse over here!" He yells at me again.

"Fuck Nott, what do you want?" At this point I am just angered by his pestering.

"Where the hell have you been? At least sit with us for five bloody minutes and have a chat? Can you fit that into your 'oh so busy' schedule?" I can hear Theos undertone of sarcasm as he speaks.

I give a deep sigh as I walk over to the two of them. I sit next to Blaise on the couch and give a shrug of annoyance. Theo looks at me and gives me a pleased nod.

"Finally! The Draco Malfoy in the flesh!" He laughs as he says this.

"I have had shit to do Nott. Unlike you, I don't sit around grabbing my dick all day waiting for something relevant to happen in my life." I snarl at him as I speak.

"Okay, aggression and spite. At least we are getting somewhere." Theo says with a smirk.

"Listen, Malfoy, we have barely seen you this term, and then on top of it this month you have really been MIA." Blaise says turning to me.

"Yeah I mean we just assume you are stuck in your room constantly shagging Lancing. I mean props to you mate, but damn, take a break for maybe a day or two?" Theo says laughing as he leans forward resting his elbows on his knees.

"I'm not even with Lancing anymore you fucking tosser." I spit at him. They both grow silent for a moment.

"You and Olivia broke up?" Blaise says in a low voice.

"Yeah, I ended it when that shit with Katie Bell was happening. I was only with her to fuck her and I did, end of story." I keep my eyes down and try to keep my anger in. I don't want to be talking about this right now with these two.

I can tell they are eyeing each other unsure of what to say. Yeah this is fucking awkward.

"Oh well..." Theo stutters a little, "I'm not sure if I should say 'I'm sorry' or 'congrats'..?"

"Shut the fuck up Nott." Blaise cuts in rolling his eyes at him.

"What did I do! He said he just wanted to fuck her, and he did! Fucking hell, can't congradulate a man in peace can I..?" Theos' eyes roll.