When Judd Meets Lexi

17

Lexi

My hand softly runs through Judd's hair, his body lying on top of mine. I had woken up to him like this and I couldn't help but smile. He probably won't ever admit it but he likes to cuddle, especially in his sleep.

The events of last night replay in my mind and I can't help but feel a blush come upon my cheeks. We had sex for the first time and, despite my body being sore, was even better than I could have imagined.

Judd was attentive and I think having him talking to me and asking me how I was doing made it easier. It was uncomfortable at first so we stopped for a bit, until he asked me what he could do to help. That's when we tried oral sex. I was so nervous at first but it made having sex after so much easier.

Last night confirmed how I feel about him and I know that I love him. I'd never had anyone take care of me the way he takes care of me, and I almost feel as if he is feeling the same way. There's a bit of fear that he might not feel that way yet, but I know what I feel.

My arm wraps around his neck and I keep running my fingers through his hair, his breathing still slow as he sleeps. His hand is fisting the t-shirt on my body, trapping me even further.

I close my eyes again as I hold him close to me. Having him lay on me like this makes me feel safe and that what happened last night only solidified that.

Judd moves slightly, but it's only to wrap his arm beneath me to hold me closer. I wait a moment to see if he's awake and I feel his head nuzzle further into my neck.

"How are you?" Judd asks, his voice low and raspy as he wakes up.

"Perfect, how are you?" I whisper, my fingers continuing to run through his hair. The curls are so soft and I love easily my fingers can run through them.

"Amazing," he says, making me smile. I love how tightly he's holding me and I honestly don't want to move. He's so cute; perfect in every way.

A knock on the door is heard and Judd nearly rushes to completely cover me.

"What the fuck do you want?" he yells, my lips pressing together as I try to hold in a laugh.

"The guys and I are going to get food. You want to come?" I hear Joe, my head pressed further into his neck. I start to kiss his skin.

"No, I'll eat later," he says, my hand moving to his neck.

Judd turns his attention back on me and his green eyes look into mine, my hand running over his cheek. He smiles at me and my thumb presses into his dimple, his head leaning down and pressing a kiss to my lips.

"Lexi, I have to tell you something," he tells me, my hands moving to his arms. I feel over his muscles and then move up to his neck, running my thumbs against the light stubble on his jawline.

"You can tell me anything," I remind him, his head nodding.

"I've, um, started to think about us and I think I should tell you what's on my mind," he says, and his face looks almost worried. And because of that, I feel the worry form in the pit of my stomach.

"Is everything okay?" I ask, his lower lip taken between his teeth. He rolls off me and I get suddenly very nervous he's no longer interested in me. And at this point, because it was right after we had sex, a million thoughts flood my mind.

"Judd," I encourage, trying to put my mind at ease.

My body sits up and he look up at me, his hand grabbing my arm. "Lexi, I just want you to know that I care a lot about you," he starts, and I swallow the lump forming in my throat.

I've heard this once in my life, and that was right before my first and only relationship ended.

"I, uh, I don't really know how to say this," he says, and I feel a tear fall down my cheek. I wipe it away quickly but he sits up, grabbing my cheek.

"Why are you crying?" he asks, concern covering his face. My emotions are overwhelming and I feel really small all of a sudden.

"I-I've had this happen before. Just...just say it," I cry, his eyebrows furrowing. "Just tell me it's over."

His lips part and my eyes close, his hand tugging me into him.

"No, no, Lexi," Judd says, his arm wrapping tightly around me.

My hand reaches into his hair and I hold onto it tightly, his arm lifting me onto his lap.

"I worded that like shit," he says, my eyes squeezing shut. Judd lifts my head and holds my head between his hands, my eyes opening slightly to look at him.

"Lexi, I love you," he whispers, my heart momentarily stopping. That wasn't what I was expecting, but I start crying for a completely different reason. I shouldn't have overreacted the way I did.

"Judd," I sigh, Judd holding my face tightly. His hands are so warm and I grab hold of his wrists, his eyes watching me with concern. I'm not sure if it's concern or worry that I might not feel the same, but my heart is so full that I feel like if I speak, I'll choke.

So I lean forward and press my lips to his, the taste of my tears mixing into our kiss.

"I love you a lot," I whisper between kisses, his hands moving to my body and tugging me closer. Judd holds me so close and I feel on top of the world knowing that the man I love, loves me back.