"fellas and shorties, please bang my line."

What if a guy on the radio tells you how he died?

❛WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU MAKE THE TEN MOST POWERFUL GODS ALIVE PLAY A GAME OF MUSICAL CHAIRS WITH ONE SEAT?❜ They fight - to the death. They fight over three crowns and a throne with steel spiked maces. They despair a little more everyday keeping their vows. They wander in hospitals to find a cure for their torn hearts. They haunt castles and secret passages. They betray the ones they love the most. They are dying women and miserable men. They make peace with their enemies, not friends. Girls of rivers with hair like the night dance down the moon stairs. Goddesses of flame hold out hands which crumble and burn. This story sings of three rings. Of forgotten maps. Of a queen who should not be alive after all she has suffered. But most importantly, it sings of three gilded crowns studded with the jewels of the heavens. Crowns of glass. ➳ Shortlisted for the Wattys 2018. ➳ Now a featured Wattpad story. ➳ Winner of over fifteen prestigious awards. ➳ Highest rank: #2 in Fantasy. ❛NO ONE TOLD ME THAT BEING A QUEEN WOULD MEAN PAYING THE PRICE OF POWER WITH STEEL AND BLOOD, DARLING.❜ rubyruins | all rights reserved ©

British business mogul Rikkard Ambrose has departed London to face his arch-rival in a deadly game of espionage and intrigue at the Royal Court of France, leaving his lady love behind to knit socks and twiddle her thumbs. Left behind alone? That is not something Lilly Linton is willing to put up with! Determined to show her boss who's boss, she embarks on her most dangerous adventure yet, armed with the most powerful weapon of all: love-and, just in case, her trusted revolver. The 5th volume of Robert Thier's award-winning Storm and Silence series.

Sick of cliché Wattpad books? Then this isn't the book for you. We take every single over-used plot, character and trope on Wattpad - from player-meets-nerd to my-boyfriend-is-a-vampire - and mash it all into one, awful, hilarious parody. NOTE: This is a parody. Characters have not been created to mock a race/nationality/sexuality, they have been created to lightly poke fun at the way certain teen fiction writers reduce them into crude stereotypes. Thanks for helping this pile of junk get to #1 in Humor!

BLACK AVENUE, EASTERN AMERIKA Everything's the same. But just a little bit different. Magic. Love. Entropy. All lawless. All wild. In 1876 a talented matchmaker is kidnapped and trapped inside an ancient genie lamp, forced to coerce beautiful women into sleeping with their unsavory captor. In 1954 a closeted professor is tangled in a violent conflict when he accidentally falls for the one soul he can't have: an androgynous D'Jinn stripped of their wings. In 2022 an overachieving college student discovers he's been crowned King of the Damned and stubbornly denies the title. But his new daemon servant won't leave him the hell alone. And Remi? Well, Remi just wants to see the World's Biggest Cowboy boot with her brother without losing a(nother) leg. This is fury. This is life. This is Hellacious. Where everything's different. But more of the same. //Highest Rank #616 Fantasy//

❛power isn't everything. it's the only thing.❜ [complete] wattys 2018 winner ❧ Lin is a hunter, one of the magically enhanced witch slayers that roam a flooded world. Under the laws of four Kings and Greymark, who rules them all, Lin is untouchable. She could massacre thousands and no-one would blink. But she is a pawn among Kings, all of them vying for total dominion of the seas and ready to rip each other apart for it. When Lin carries out a sentence that leaves her plotting revenge against her superiors, she unwittingly explores the multiple fronts to the coming war. Shabina, a leader determined to overthrow the Kings, and Hadrian, a secretive prince born into a game of shadows are but two of them. One thing is certain: they are all willing to burn the world for what they want. wattpad achievements: wattys 2018 winner • the breakthroughs wattpad picks • diverse worlds gladiator pit book of the month [february] • dark fantasy gems of wattpad blog mentions: matthew dawkins • 8 wattpad books for halloween designwizard • the best 60 wattpad books of 2019 original fiction features complicated friendships, lgbt (and i do mean lgbt) characters, female antiheroes, characters of color, post-apocalyptic feudalism, witches, and cathartic violence.

❝SHE IS A WOMAN IS A WEAPON IS A GUN IS A GIRL IS A LOVER❞ ©KELLY2017

❝You have exactly one year to kill me and not a single day more.❞ ❝And what happens if I don't murder you exactly as you demand, princess?❞ ❝I'll demand a full refund. Customer dissatisfaction guaranteed.❞ melanie enderby can't bear the thought of ending her life. so she hires an internet assassin to do it for her. then the universe brings her phillip knox, a quirky photographer who wears rose-tinted sunglasses and somehow talks her out of it. melanie doesn't want to love him. knox knows he shouldn't crave her. but they're drawn together for reasons they can't explain. because knox is a sweet mystery, a loveable conundrum, and quite possibly... her soulmate? unfortunately, melanie's already married to her first soulmate. and now that she's changed her mind about dying, she can't seem to get a hold of her assassin. an assassin who just might be the man she fell in love with. it's a race against time. hop in. [zoom] Kay Elle © All Rights Reserved