Spandex Is Mandatory

"Great power comes with great..." I raised my eyebrows at Guardian, looking his skin-tight suit up and down. "Urges to wear spandex, apparently."

"Are you using altered famous superhero comic book references to insult me?" he asked incredulously.

I snorted. "You bet your fucking ass, I am."

***

Crown City has all the typical big-city flare. There's a McDonald's on every corner, enough carbon emissions to end life as we know it, and a new supervillain trying to take over right before finals week. For Tessa Kingston, Supers are nothing out of the ordinary. In fact, Tessa likes to pretend that Supers don't even exist at all.

Though Tessa isn't exactly shy with her not-so-popular thoughts on Crown City's resident vigilante, Guardian, he seems to have taken a liking to the annoyed teenager. Well, he and his buddies have, that is - buddies meaning two supervillains dressed in Walmart Star Wars masks. Crown City has always been a center for mayhem and superpowers, but when strange things start happening too often to be coincidences, Tessa finds herself in the middle of a fight she didn't start but she sure as hell was going to end.

Villains torment her. Heroes try to save her. Tessa just wants to pass Supers 101.

In a world full of Supers, it's up to normal-teenager Tessa Kingston to save her city. A typical tagline she's well-aware of, of course. As Tessa prepares to show these Super-fools they messed with the wrong girl, she just has one condition:

There's no way she's wearing spandex.

***

BOOK #1 OF THE "SUPERHEROES SUCK" DUOLOGY

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WARNING: Contains mild swearing, cliffhangers, plot twists, and enough sarcasm to last a lifetime.