the roommate → brad simpson | ✓
- Reads 369,482
- Votes 11,007
- Parts 51
- Time 5h 30m
Complete, First published Dec 09, 2017
𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐑𝐎𝐎𝐌𝐌𝐀𝐓𝐄
❛fuck you, simpson!❜
❛my pleasure, babe❜
© hairtoolongAll Rights Reserved
#1bradsimpson
- ✦preface
- one - "i wish i let my mum stay"
- two - "youre like squidward rude"
- three - "ill crawl my fist up your ass"
- four - "the eight rules of fight club"
- five - "bibbity bobbity back the fuck up"
- six - "wham bam thank you maam"
- seven - "the biggest arsehole after theresa may"
- eight - "reincarnated as a blotchy rock"
- nine - "it feels stuffy in here"
- ten - "you need therapy"
- eleven - "fart on the food"
- twelve - "ill fucking kill you"
- thirteen - "not gonna be hard to stay away"
- fourteen - "theyre called sentence enhancers"
- fifteen - "youre like that in the bedroom"
- sixteen - "ive got magical hands"
- seventeen - "hawaiian pizza kinda person"
- eighteen - "its just a coping mechanism"
- nineteen - "i wont have to kill you"
- twenty - "she has to leave"
- twenty one - "didnt last long"
- twenty two - "youre harder to kidnap"
- twenty three - "fake ass moustache"
- twenty four - "i just revealed all of the governments secrets"
- twenty five - "you and brad were all snug"
- twenty six - "a leash is probably more efficient"
- twenty seven - "anything for you to come"
- twenty eight - "i should get you a trampoline"
- twenty nine - "no shit sherlock"
- thirty - "painting your fucking face across the concrete"
- thirty one - "im so so sorry"
- thirty two - "vamps arent scary"
- thirty three - "ill pay you to be my stripper"
- thirty four - "youre so in love"
- thirty five - "you couldve given me a blow job"
- thirty six - "tickety-ted the time telling bitch"
- thirty seven - "you have a comeback for everything"
- thirty eight - "i have that affect"
- thirty nine - "oi oi saveloy"
- forty - "stop staring you horny fucker"
- forty one - "shes been playing hard to get"
- forty two - "please come back"
- forty three - "are you fucking shitting on my bed"
- forty four - "im not expecting you to forgive me"
- forty five - "youre so bloody stupid"
- forty six - "the beds too comfortable"
- forty seven - "god knows youre worth it"
- forty eight - "queen of mario kart"
- forty nine - "always gonna be my number one"
- epilogue - "the final chapter"
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