Running With Scissors - Sam Camp - Wattpad

Story cover for Running With Scissors by Sam_le_fou

Running With Scissors

Reads 297,832
Votes 18,032
Parts 42
Time 9h 17m

Reads 297,832
Votes 18,032
Parts 42
Time 9h 17m

absurdist action adult adventure cancer comedy contemporary dark darkhumor friendship hitman humor legal suspense texttospeech thriller

Diagnosed with a terminal illness, Peter Katz hires a hitman to take him out. But when a cure is discovered, Peter's got to outrun the assassin to stay alive!

*****

When douchebag lawyer Peter Katz gets diagnosed with terminal cancer, he wants to die painlessly. Still, death seems to elude his every attempt, so he hires an assassin to kill him at a random time and place within the month. Unfortunately for Peter, right after he orders the hit, a treatment is discovered that would add decades to his life. Now Peter Katz has to start running, until the month-long deadline ends. Desperate to survive, he has to deal with tall-dwarves, unionized suicide workers, art terrorism and all the insanity that being alive has to offer. Will he make it to the end of the month? Or will Peter Katz live a life's worth of craziness in however many days he has left?

For what is Comedy, but Tragedy + Time?

[[word count: 100,000-150,000 words]]All Rights Reserved

absurdist action adult adventure cancer comedy contemporary dark darkhumor friendship hitman humor legal suspense texttospeech thriller

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Albatross by Vapid_Ink

Elliot's partner was his whole world, but after Allan's death, his ghost haunts Elliot's dreams. Everyone tells Elliot to move on, but he isn't sure he can. ***** It's been a year since the love of Elliot's life, Allan, passed away. Everyone thinks he should have recovered after that much time, but Allan still haunts Elliot every night. He struggles to maintain relationships with his family, and despite a coworkers interest he can't summon up the courage to date. Elliot is living for the past, because to live for the present means he'll have to live with a hole in his heart. But the question Elliot has to face chases him through his monotonous days: is mourning Allan with everything he has truly living? [[word count: 40,000-50,000 words]]

You Are the Shell to My Tortoise | ✓ by LotteStarburst

Nolan, an unapproachable guy who ignores the existence of all his schoolmates, sleeps in all of his classes. Normally, this wouldn't be Chelsea Arnold's problem-she does her best to pay attention in class and attends gym like a good, normal student. Unfortunately, she just so happens to be his assigned desk partner in many classes. She's frequently forced to wake him in English class and ends up earning the unofficial title of Nolan's Wake-up Alarm-a title that nobody in the entire school covets. The last thing she wants is to interact with him more than she absolutely has to. One day, their gym teacher sends her to bring him back to class, which he always skips for some reason. When she accidentally shines her flashlight in his sleeping face, it triggers a chain of events that gradually intertwines their lives together. It's hard to be a normal student when you start befriending the school oddball. It doesn't help that he has more secrets than the Big Ben has stairs. ----- Complete. (first person, past tense, slowburn) ----- 1st place in Humor Category of Psychological Novel Reads Contest 2020 (29 Sep 2020) ----- Started: April 28, 2020 Completed: July 23, 2021 Word Count: 160K+ ----- The sequel, The Tortoise and His Sunrise, is up on my profile now!

Identity by mazecatt

Within only an hour, it felt like his world stopped spinning. His life collapsed. He gets the opportunity for a second chance, but will it be worth all the trouble? Extended summary inside. This is a prequel to Permanent, but you can read them in either order! Permanent is already published (and completed) on my profile. Updates every Sunday! Start date - 8/28/22 End date - 11/20/22 TW - Abuse, suicide, bullying, violence, injuries/blood, (brief) language, and (brief) panic/anxiety attacks I won't be posting TW's at the beginning of each chapter. This is it. Disclaimer - Most of the characters and settings belong to Marvel.

Blindsided By The Boss by JeniRaeD

Enemies-to-lovers * Bickering/bantering Boss/employee * Romantic comedy with a HEA He says I'm a hemorrhoid and a massive dark cloud without a silver lining. I consider him a bosshole and heartless prick--because that's what he is and more. I've never met my boss. He works only through emails. I was two months in at my new job, when I had to fly to Florida to bury my grandmother. The night of her funeral, an overly hot man approached me while I was in the middle of trying to meet a deadline, wondering if I'd be interested in having a wild night with him. It had been a couple years since I Iast been with a man. I was pissed at my boss, and he was good looking, so I accepted his offer. Next, I emailed my boss telling him I wasn't making the deadline because I was going to get laid. And I did... lots of it. The next morning he was gone. Months later, I run into my boss--in the dark--on masquerade night at a sex club. Let's just say we had an interesting moment. After that I wanted to kill him more than I already wanted to. Weeks later. I had the shock of my life when we met face to face at my best friends wedding. Callum's a one-and-done type of guy. And I wasn't looking for love either. But our friends had other plans for us. They thought we were the perfect match and did all they could to set us up. Will us two stubborn hotheads see we're meant to be? Credit for cover: https://selfpubbookcovers.com/RLSather

Death Is My BFFLAD (Book Two Original Series) by katrocks247

(Bfflad- Best friends for life and death) Dear Reader, Let's start at the beginning shall we? I died. Oh no, not one of these stories again where someone angelic and heroic saves the damsel in distress. If only I was that lucky. My heart stopped beating. My lungs stopped working, my soul began to lift away... And then I was saved by a beautiful man with a kind heart and sparkles sprinkled around his head in a golden halo. A cunning, dazzling smile etched his angled features and his hair lay perfectly on his head like...black, sinful layers of pure cynical distrusting evil. Evil that was just waiting to onset a innocent girl as myself and allow her a short amount of time of happiness, and then finish her off when she became older. I'll give you a hint. The beginning of that description was slightly exaggerated. The Angel of Death. One of the only creatures known that was capable of settling the boundaries of heaven on earth. The only creature capable of making one of the Devil's darkest deals to my loving mother; a second chance for her daughter. This comes with consequences of course. Everything you know about Death is wrong. Death is not natural, Death is not normal, Death is not doleful, and Death is far from mercenary. Death blends into the shadows like coal against the most atramentous sky. Death walks the earth with his cursed, monstrous and exotic features, his enticing voice and betraying alluring eyes. Death deceives, scratches, and plays with your mind, until you slowly and painfully loose your grip on reality. He'll make you believe he's a different person, that there's a sliver hope for him. Hope for you. Death is close. Forever and always, Faith Williams ************ DIMBFF FAN CLUB ON FACEBOOK: http://www.facebook.com/media/set/?set=a.1605057011183.80718.1378871754&type=1#!/groups/308207282529485/ **** MY WRITING PAGE! Please join! http://www.facebook.com/pages/Kat-aka-katrocks247-from-Wattpad/208740202517075

Tick Tock Goes the Clock by Kale_Kabbage

Things have been a little rocky for Peter lately, but he's still standing. He's still doing his best to succeed, going to college and patrolling in his spare time. Sure, it's lonely, what with his family being dead, Ned and MJ in Boston, Mr. Stark off living his life happily with his family, and Happy avoiding him. But whatever, it's all fine. Everything is fine. Or it was until a mysterious new disease pops up and Peter gets some unwanted news. Good 'ol Parker luck, right? Content Warning: -Coarse Language -Depressive Mentality and Themes -Mild Violence -Descriptive Sexual Acts Story by Kale_Kabbage All character belong to Marvel®

And Here's To Nowhere by BroganEastwood

A short comedy about the death of an old man who doesn't belong anywhere. He' meets some friends and has some adventures, but what happens if things get too out of hand! Well he dose have forever. Just to be sure I don't believe in religion. I don't think there's anything after death. Well you can't feel emotion because they come from your brain, sorry I probably just made my one reader suicidal. Sorry Dan One other thing why does everyone just read the last chapters and skip the middle ones, I fell like I have no fillers and the zoo trip is a parody of a story Spring Valley Academy, with a spin-off which I'm crossing over with.

𝓈𝓊𝓃𝒻𝓁𝑜𝓌𝑒𝓇 | p.p. x reader | book one. by wildsupernova

{this book is currently going through an extensive editing process. writing styles may not line up between chapters and some plot points may not match up until book is fully edited. edited chapters will be marked with a checkmark} You never believe something can happen to you until it does. Your entire life gets turned upside down, uprooting you from everything you thought you knew and turning you into something completely different. Your world seems to take a turn for the worst, and the things you once enjoyed take a backseat to wallowing in self pity and wading knee-deep in sadness. That's how it was when my brother died. Only a year ago, everything I knew changed for good. Brand new town, brand new people, brand new life to live. Thankfully friends are easy to come by, but it turns out I wouldn't be lucky enough to keep my normal life. One fateful night and two chance encounters would change everything for me. A fresh start in New York turned out to be far more than that; it was a second chance at life itself. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- TOP RANKINGS: #70 in science #519 in superhero

The Boss by 6JoKer9

Nick Gerard, cold, ruthless, a hired gun and bodyguard when the job required. He had everything he ever wanted, money, power and fame. His name was whispered amongst the privileged and when they needed someone to disappear or needed protection they just had to pay his price. Life was good until a job landed on his desk that left him breathless. His world danced in and out of theirs but he never tangled in their affairs, when someone he cares for becomes indebted to them he has no choice but to accept their terms, a life for a life. Fate left him damned 10 years ago and now it's damning him again. Will Nick claim back his life or will he succumb to the one thing fate won't let him forget?

Alluring Masquerade by RedsBookmark

Drowning ... in debts. Either it be financial or other. A Debt is a debt at the end of the day. Hira may seem cold and biting, but that's only a front. Truthfully, she's quite insecure and fragile. But she has to keep the falseness in order to get by in her ordinary world - since that is how she has grown to take care of herself. But she and her family are struggling all the time because of financial difficulties. Kael offers to pay her if she pretends to be his girlfriend, in order to save himself from getting set up by his mother with someone he doesn't even know. So he makes a deal with her, a contract, and they begin to get along once they get to know each other. But Hira wasn't supposed to fall for him ... that wasn't in the contract ... was it? And then there is Zach. Hira's crush. He seems everything that she wants in a man ... or so she thinks. Because in the end she has to chose between him and Kael. Who would she choose? In addition, her past seems to be pulling her down. And then there's her best friend who returns home after 14 years bringing a sorrowful secret along with him. He has secretly been in love with her for years. --- Cover Credits Go To; 1. Model: http://faestock.deviantart.com/art/Mask2-374376394 2. Hair: http://moonglowlilly.deviantart.com/art/Png-Hair-2-339184915?q=favby%3APsychosomatic-Psyche%2F1086012&qo=4 3. Bokeh effect: http://so-ghislaine.deviantart.com/

Man Of Few Words by GavinMackenzie

One man's painful yet funny search for meaning in a life about to be cut short. Cancer has made David Alexander's whole existence suddenly seem worthless. But is it?

Mission: Undercover by ann2ktheauthor

📖Featured by @adultfiction on "Kills and Thrills" reading list📖 Previously known as "Undercover: Fake Identity" *** "What are you running away from, Vanessa?" he asked, looking at her with deep, dark eyes. Those icy yet fiery eyes. And hers. Hers, full of tears, flashed in the darkness. "I'll tell you everything the day I'm ready to lose you." *** Vanessa Blake, also known to some as X, is a professional assassin whose services the Main National Intelligence Agency Special Operations Division often uses in certain and special cases. Whether outright eliminating a target or working undercover, she executes every task with precision and unmatched ability. What she doesn't suspect, however, is that her latest assignment will change her life completely. Going undercover into the life of the handsome billionaire Cole Willker will confront her with a constant struggle with waves of feelings unknown to her. Their damaged souls, fighting their demons, will collide, and one epic love will be born. *** Mysteries, secrets, conspiracies. Action, drama, romance. Friendships, love, hate, denial. A story about one big, explosive love. Love that changes. People. Fates. Worlds. Love that comes where no one expected it. Where no one believed it could even exist. *** * Dark Romance * Mature themes * Strong language * Murders, gore, and violence descriptions

The Beast by xwriteratheartxo

HANNAH I've spent my entire twenty-one years on this earth in the background. Walked over by friends. Family. Strangers. And I didn't see a problem with it; I'd rather nobody pay attention to me. It was safer that way. Easier. Until I got the wrong kind of attention. Lev Somov caught me running from an impromptu crime I was committing against my ex-boyfriend, and in that moment, he somehow decided I was worth giving his attention to. All the bad kinds of attention. Next thing I know, he's watching over me, hijacking my job and becoming my client. And then he takes things above a level I never thought possible. He is a monster, incapable of feeling any type of remorse or guilt for anyone and anything, including me. All I can hope for is that I make it out of this obsession alive. LEV This life wasn't meant for me, but now that he's gone, it's mine for the taking. And no one is going to stop me. I've shown my loyalty through blood, and I make no plans to change my future. Especially not for the little kukolka I found stumbling into the wrong alleyway. I'll take my time before I break her. And then, the Dynasty will be mine.

Far From You by _marlie_b

(book 1) y/n stark is really not here for this european school vacation because in this post-endgame world, she's mourning the loss of her dad. but one (1) sticky boi peter parker is just trying to be the friend he once was while also trying not to flirt too much because if she rejects him (which she wouldn't, not that he knows that) while they're in venice holy hell he'll just pitch himself off the gondola right then and there. basically, y/n has been distancing herself & peter misses her & this school trip is a great way for him to coax her back into the real world & y/n really loves peter but is super sensitive and scared to lose him & also mysterio shows up at some point ugh @ nick fury leave ned leeds alone *this story was written prior to avengers: infinity war & spider-man: far from home coming out. therefore, the canon in which these characters live in is different from the mcu. in this canon - tony stark, captain america, & thor have all died. black widow & vision have survived. the decimation, where half the population was snapped from existence was erased with time travel so those who were snapped came back within online minutes, leaving some residual trauma. in this canon, those who survived the decimation only lived six months without those who were snapped, but those six months have been erased - leaving only the avengers to fully remember what happened.

Athanasius Finch: Private Dick | ONC 2020 by Sam_le_fou

Beatrix Cagliostro, a starving Doctor in Letters, is hired as a Ghostwriter by Athanasius Finch, an eccentric and megalomaniac P.I, and together they will solve the biggest mystery there is: how to pay rent and not die trying. ***** Beatrix Cagliostro(pen name) thought she had hit rock bottom as a starving artist in New York with an art degree that only qualified her to be a Subway's Sandwich Artist®, but when she finds an Ad for a live-in ghostwriter/sidekick, she jumps at the opportunity. What she couldn't predict was that her new employer, the self-proclaimed "World's Third Best Detective" Athanasius Finch, would flip her world upside-down as he peels back the fat upperbelly of New York's society in a conspiracy involving evil personal care products, secret American royalty, and oddly watery Clamato. But the biggest mystery of all, one that will take their whole, undivided attention, is how to make it to next month without starving in the process. ***** My entry for the #OpenNovellaContest using prompt #58 "If we are assigning blame, then this is your fault for leaving me alone with explosives in the first place."

The Doctor's Assistant by AtlasPyro

Have you ever felt so unimaginably lonely? Ever wanted to end your life because things have gotten so unbelievably horrible? Parents misunderstanding you? Pressure too much amongst your daily stresses? Do not fret, just walk to the back alley behind Maple View Memorial Hospital. Walk down the creaking metal steps, knock a few times on the wooden door and the doctor will handle the rest. These were some of the things Elliot heard being whispered at the weekly depression seminars. They were dying for a way out, a way out of life. A way that didn't involve hanging in the kitchen before the movers showed up. With mom and dad dead from a car crash a few weeks prior, and zero friends to acknowledge their absence, Elliot decides to visit the doctor. But is it more than what they bargained for?

27 percent ✓ by livflower

completed: 08/27/18 -shortlisted for Fiction awards- May Springer enters her Senior year of high school with high hopes for her future, maybe she'll make some friends this year. Maybe she'll get higher than a -A on a test, and maybe just maybe she can get into her dream college. But dreams don't always come true, when she is diagnosed with the worst form of Leukemia her dreams drop dead and she looses all hope. That is until she threw up on a police officer. Well, this should be fun. Will love, fear and whole-hearted fun pull this broken girl together? Or will the illness take her over before the bad boy can save her? ➶highest rank: #15 in Humor!

His Darkest Obsession by ellawryts_

One night. Two strangers. A single mistake, and her life has never been the same since. When Siya caught her fiancée cheating on her with her step-sister, heartbroken, she runs away to Paris to clear her mind and gets drunk. That was her first mistake. Her second and more serious mistake was when she, too drunk to even form coherent sentences, had sex with some handsome stranger as a final 'fuck you' to her asshole of an ex fiancé. She thought that it was only a one night stand, that they will just give each other a wonderful night, say goodbye and go their own ways. However, fate had other plans for her. What she didn't know was that the man she had sex with was one of the most ruthless mafia lords in the country, and that the more time they spent away from each other after that, the more he got obsessed with her. Also, what will she do when she finds out that she is pregnant with the baby of a stranger she met on an unfortunate night? How will they meet again? TROPES: Second chances Accidental pregnancy 'Touch her and die' MMC is obsessed with the FMC (At least give it a try before deciding it's good or not. It's my first ever book)

For The Next Thirty Seconds ✓ by lanaisadumbass

**editing ((: "How many sets of thirty seconds are in a day?" "My rough estimate?" "Sure." "About three thousand." "Oh." "Yeah." • 19 year-old Jack's life has been one traumatic event after the next. So, being diagnosed with small cell lung cancer was just icing on the cake. With a survival rate of 14 percent and a life expectancy of 4 months, Jack does all he knows how to do: he runs. 18 year-old Lane's life has just been turned upside down. After finding out her sister's engaged to her childhood best friend, she doesn't think it could get any worse... until she finds out her happily-married parents of 24 years are getting a divorce. She can't stand even being in the same room as one of her family members, so she does something she's never done before: she runs. The Big Apple has never seemed so small. At least, not to Jack and Lane, not when they were next to each other. Nothing seemed too big. Side by side, they could conquer the world. They could fly. But, if the world decides to fight back, whose to say they won't fall, instead? 𝘖𝘯𝘦 𝘥𝘢𝘺 𝘪𝘴 𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘪𝘵 𝘵𝘢𝘬𝘦𝘴.

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Slide 1 of 19

Albatross cover

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Death Is My BFFLAD (Book Two Original Series) cover

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And Here's To Nowhere cover

𝓈𝓊𝓃𝒻𝓁𝑜𝓌𝑒𝓇 | p.p. x reader | book one. cover

Alluring Masquerade cover

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Athanasius Finch: Private Dick | ONC 2020 cover

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27 percent ✓ cover

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Albatross

Elliot's partner was his whole world, but after Allan's death, his ghost haunts Elliot's dreams. Everyone tells Elliot to move on, but he isn't sure he can. ***** It's been a year since the love of Elliot's life, Allan, passed away. Everyone thinks he should have recovered after that much time, but Allan still haunts Elliot every night. He struggles to maintain relationships with his family, and despite a coworkers interest he can't summon up the courage to date. Elliot is living for the past, because to live for the present means he'll have to live with a hole in his heart. But the question Elliot has to face chases him through his monotonous days: is mourning Allan with everything he has truly living? [[word count: 40,000-50,000 words]]