Humor On High: Clean Jokes and Funny Stories - Crystal Scherer - Wattpad

Humor On High: Clean Jokes and Funny Stories

Membaca 105,078
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Membaca 105,078
Suara 1,914
Bagian 11
Durasi 1h 12m

clean funny hilarious humor jokes random stories

I have a soft spot for clean and funny jokes.
Perhaps you do too.

I have slowly been collecting things that I found particularly humorous. 
Most of these are not mine, although a few are.

Some chapters are just images, and will have (images) in the chapter title.

A new chapter every Monday.  

Enjoy.  :)

I kindly request that people refrain from swearing in my books. The English language is huge, and many other things can be used instead. I don't mind things like shit, blast it, or fuzzy bunny slippers, but I can't stand the f-bomb or when people insult female dogs. If people want to vent, why not do it more creatively? Nicky manages it quite well in The Virus Within.


The lovely cover was made by @Ellie6880!Seluruh Hak Cipta Dilindungi Undang-Undang

clean funny hilarious humor jokes random stories

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... oleh amarieley

Ardent oleh Alva_Eriksson

Reso haunts Captain Aliyn Flynn's dreams. On a dangerous mission to discover the star system's secrets, can she and the alluring Tyr find the key to the survival of the galaxy? ***** The galactic inhabitants of the Milky Way know the dangers of the Reso star system. Its gas giant, the planet Plenare, terrorizes any ship that dares to approach. After narrowly escaping with their lives, Captain Aliyn Flynn and her crew's impressive survival catches the eye of Earth's government officials, thrusting them into an unexpected and dangerous mission to discover Reso's secrets. Complicating matters further, the alluring and secretive Tyr Logan is assigned to Aliyn's crew as her executive officer. Despite their many differences, Tyr and Aliyn must come to terms with the deep connection they share to decipher an ancient secret--a secret that holds the key not only to the past but the continued survival of the galaxy they call home. [[Word count: 100,000-150,000 words]] Content warning: Violence Watty Winner 2017

The Vampire Girl oleh BrookeMcCall

Sophie is not your average freshman in high school...She is a vampire...you might think being a vampire is cool and everything but it completely messes up your life.Having to deal with High school drama is hard enough but also having to hold back the hunger of blood is really exhausting

The Broken Clock is Right Thrice: Confessions of a Fake Psychic Detective #4 oleh BenSobieck

Season 4 of Confessions of a Fake Psychic Detective Zandra, a famous "psychic" who grifts the grifters using only her wits, gave the worst of society plenty of reasons to want her dead during her long career. When she discovers someone from her past wants to put her in a grave, there's only one way to narrow down the long list of suspects: invite her most notorious former clients to a haunted mansion for a dinner party of the damned. Also available on YONDER, the next-generation reading app from the Wattpad family.

THE WARRIOR PRINCESS oleh KayceeMike9

The Warrior Princess Princess Fauna of Scotland, last daughter of the king and queen of Scotland. Her only wish is to become a warrior like her brothers and sister but her parents are not willing to hear anything that concerns that, all they care about is her future as a princess, so she does what no normal child or even a normal princess would think of doing. She takes her future into her hands, disguised; she goes into the warrior camp without the knowledge of the king and queen. Dresses, tiaras, high heeled shoes, that's all for a princess, and oh, I forgot, being perfect also. I am not like the rest princesses who fancy royal parties and late afternoon tea, I admit I'm not a perfect princess, but I'm okay. I prefer archery, martial arts, sword fighting, horse-riding, things extremely different from what a princess should do and what a princess should like. I hate parties, I'm not weird, it's just my kind of person. Warriors Academy would have been the right place for me along with my siblings but those are my thoughts and they are not supposed to be heard, so I keep on wondering what my life would turn out to be. (Disclamier: No picture in this book belongs to me. Shoutout to the actual owners.) As at 6th of May, #1 in Bravery #9 in Archery #7 in Majesty

Her Boss gxg oleh ZomanXx

Her boss. Who would've guessed? -

The Heir and the General oleh druidrose

Forced into an engagement with a man she doesn't love, Reyna must ignore her bond with her father's general in order to avoid a war and save her throne. ***** As the first female heir to one of the great Northern Kingdoms, Reyna panics when her claim to the throne is threatened by the discovery that her father's general is her soulbound partner. She forces herself to ignore their connection, determined to be more than a general's wife, only for her father to manipulate her into a political engagement with a man she could never love. So to forge her own path forward, keep her throne, and confront her feelings for the general who owns her heart, Reyna must find a way to refuse this arranged marriage without destroying her kingdom in the process. [[word count: 100,000-150,000 words]] ---------- Cover designed by Ren Tachibana

Creatures of the Night oleh cloudedwithstories

Creatures of the Night is now published as a Wattpad Book! As a Wattpad reader, you can access both the Original Edition and Books Edition upon purchase. Milena, an obedient teenager, has to team up with the supernatural creatures she was taught to fear in order to escape the people she once loved. ***** In a world where humans must hide underground to stay safe from the creatures who roam the night, Milena's life as an outcast is hardly worth noticing. But on the day her village is attacked and her life is spared by the mysterious Elias, Milena is forced to throw everything she thought she knew about her world out the window. Because while Elias looks just as human as she is, he's actually the leader of a pack of wolf shifters, and the bond she feels with him compels her to start asking questions about the things she's been told about the creatures of the night. Because if her village was willing to lie about something like this, what other secrets might they be keeping from her?

Dragon: Myth of the Bermuda Triangle oleh CroodsGirl

|NOVELETTE #1 · 9X FEATURED · AMBYS 2023 SHORTLIST · SPOTLIGHT STORY| Twelve-year-old Will is a dragon. He's a member of the Water Clan that thrives in the Bermuda Triangle. His parents abandoned him seven years ago and never returned, leaving Will with just a magic necklace and the Ocean to guide him. Alone on a tropical island, his world will change when he meets her-a beautiful young girl named Maddie. All he wants is to spend the rest of his life with her, which proves to be a grave and miraculous mistake. A chain of events brings the two tweens together on the famous Carnival Ecstasy, where they must learn the truth behind the Bermuda Triangle to save Will's legacy. However, darkness is in the air, as well as something that challenges the dragons' future once and for all. Who/What is the monster that dooms ships and planes to the bottom of the Triangle? What does it want from Will? His parents abandoned him for a reason, but only the young dragon can figure it out. *** *Claxton spin-off story, but it can easily be read as a standalone.* Word Count: 10,000-20,000

The Faeries of Dulwich Woods oleh DulwichFaerie

Shy, lonely tween, Avery Shaw, is struggling with the isolating effects of bereavement on her family when, through a strange misunderstanding, she is dragged into a fantastical, magical realm and forced to defend herself before a faerie court. She wins the faeries over with her honesty and bravery; they come to respect her humanity and soon rely on her to resolve various knotty problems that require a mortal touch. But Avery makes a powerful enemy when she thwarts the plans of the hobgoblin Puck; when he kidnaps her mother in revenge, will her fae friends be there to save the day? Copyright, 2019: all rights reserved. Do not reproduce this book in any form.

Trouble in Paradise | ONC 2024 oleh Kelsea_Dove

[Original Story] In the dreary, short days of late January, 1970, strangers arrive at the Paradise Hotel in Arkansas. Some are here for respite. Some for work. Some for trouble. The holidays may be over, but the murders aren't.

THE VISITOR oleh TonyHarmsworth

Specialist astronaut Evelyn Slater encounters a small, badly damaged, ancient alien artefact on the first ever space-junk elimination mission. Where was it from? Who'd sent it? International governments impose a security clampdown. Evelyn leads a team of hand-picked scientists who make amazing discoveries within the alien device. Secrecy is impossible to maintain. When the news is finally released, she becomes embroiled in international politics, worldwide xenophobic hatred and violence. This is book one of Tony Harmsworth's First Contact series of novels. If you like realistic near-future stories which compel you to imagine yourself as the protagonist, The Visitor is the book for you. The Visitor - hard science fiction with a wicked twist. Read it today. (C) 2017 Tony Harmsworth - All Rights Reserved. For the avoidance of doubt, anyone using this storyline, characters or copying prose or dialogue without written permission, will be prosecuted under international intellectual property laws. If you wish to write fan fiction based on the characters or invented worlds in my work, please seek written permission.

The Virus Within: Blood Moon (Book 3) oleh CrystalScherer

If you're a zombie, how far would you be willing to go to save the two people you care about the most? Season 3 of The Virus Within * * * * * Trinity isn't about to let anything stop her. Come hell or high water, she's determined to get Jess and Nicky back. And heaven help anyone who stands in her way. Whoever said 'Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned' had clearly never met a Nightstalker on the warpath. The blood moon is shedding its red light upon the night, and the hunt is on. The question remains, whose blood will be spilled first? And who will survive? Forget the dish soap. Grab the rutabagas and the firecrackers for this rescue mission.

Wendizzy's Writer Room oleh Wendizzy

In this book, you'll get a behind the scenes look at how your favorite characters were born, my creative process, and the dirty details never before revealed. Tex's Camp Q&A: Come sit by the fire and ask me whatever you'd like. We can roast marshmallows, tell scary stories, and hang out in the comments like a big, happy family. Gator's Backstage Pass: A place full of secrets. Learn the-sometimes embarrassing-details on how my wildest scenes came to life, facts about the characters, the process, and myself.

The Chronicles of Onyx: Book I oleh Raven_DarkHeart

***2024 Watty Awards Shortlisted*** https://www.wattpad.com/list/1642504418 **Action/Adventure Second place winner of The Fabulous Writer Awards ** War. For as long as memory serves, it has consumed the lands of Druzatria, stripping away freedom and peace from the kindred who dwell there, claiming countless innocent lives as casualties. For Onyx, life has been blood and sand. She is a gladiator, made for battle, bound by chains. She was forged in the Queen's arenas, raised not as a daughter but as a weapon, honed by violence and bloodshed. Abandoned by her father and gripping to the fading memory of her mother; she's learned to bury any weakness deep, to survive at all costs. Though her power rivals that of the strongest, she is bound-imprisoned by the Queen's merciless hold, wielded only as a tool of destruction. The arena has sculpted her into an unbreakable warrior, yet she is locked in a relentless struggle with herself. Haunted by the urge for something more. Until an Orcish Halfbreed enters the pit, the clash of their blades ignites a fate neither could foresee-a fight that will alter the course of her fate forever. Setting both on a path neither expected. Will she fall further under the Queen's iron grip, or rise and claim the one thing she has fought for her entire life? Will she lose everything she has fought to keep? And is she willing to pay in blood?

birdie oleh Bella09980

"she's our birdie and we love her"

Dark Snow White (Grimmoire Series) oleh AtomicNicky

What if Snow White wasn't so good after all? Eleanor, the Queen of RedCrest presides over the kingdom with her son, Floran. The time since the war has been peaceful, until one day when a mysterious woman arrives on horseback, bloodied, dirtied and with an arrow embedded in her shoulder. The woman is revealed to be Snow White, who causes quite a stir with the residents of RedCrest. Everyone takes quite the liking to her, including Floran. Everyone except Queen Eleanor, that is, who believes that Snow White is harbouring a secret. A deadly secret. (Featured in Fantasy during 2015)

Reborn oleh DaniOgier

Violet Winters has been through a lot. Her mother left when she was fifteen, her dad turned abusive and to top it all off, she fell for the vampire that kidnapped her. Struggling to come to terms with the fact she is now a vampire herself, she didn't think things could possibly get any worse but there are more threats out there and they won't remain invisible for long. Ghosts from the past will come back to haunt Shadow and the question on everyone's mind is; will they get out of it alive? (REBORN HAS NOT YET BEEN EDITED) Copyright © 2016 by DaniOgier All rights reserved. This book or any portion thereof may not be reproduced or used in any manner whatsoever without the express written permission of the publisher.

Knife in the Dark oleh ArgusPalas

How do you deal when a trained assassin goes rogue? You neutralize them. But what happens when nine of them go rogue? You try to hunt them.

The Virus Within: Secrets Unraveled (Book 5) oleh CrystalScherer

Hordes of strange, unranked zombies are appearing and threatening to overrun the remaining human Strongholds, as Trinity and her companions race to find out who's behind it. Season 5 of The Virus Within *** As if a handful of zombies with strange traits weren't bad enough, they're now appearing in hordes...And there are still no leads on who's creating them or where they're coming from. Trinity tries to protect the humans while Nina struggles to understand the zombie triggers, only to make a surprising discovery. The triggers are coming undone on their own. The unranked will eventually disappear-but this means Wren will lose her mind and sanity unless Trinity can find the group responsible and help Nina save her. The clock is ticking and the hunt is on as both human and zombie lives are on the line in this action-packed fifth installment of 'The Virus Within' series.

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Slide 1 of 20

The Vampire Girl cover

The Broken Clock is Right Thrice: Confessions of a Fake Psychic Detective #4 cover

THE WARRIOR PRINCESS cover

Her Boss gxg cover

The Heir and the General cover

Creatures of the Night cover

Dragon: Myth of the Bermuda Triangle cover

The Faeries of Dulwich Woods cover

Trouble in Paradise | ONC 2024 cover

THE VISITOR cover

The Virus Within: Blood Moon (Book 3) cover

Wendizzy's Writer Room cover

The Chronicles of Onyx: Book I cover

Dark Snow White (Grimmoire Series) cover

Knife in the Dark cover

The Virus Within: Secrets Unraveled (Book 5) cover

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