Celia (A Sinclair Society Novella)

Chapter One

 Secrets.

I'd never realized how destructive a secret could be. In my uncle's home, it would have been impossible to keep a secret in a house full of cousins. Nothing happened that none of them knew about anyway, so what would be the point of trying to keep a secret?

There had been no girlish confidences from friends. No youthful mistake to be ashamed of. The closest thing to a secret I'd ever had was keeping my feelings of unhappiness to myself while living with my uncle and his family. Did that really count, though?

Upon my marriage, there was nothing I wouldn't tell my husband. The thought never even entered my mind. Why would I keep anything from the man I loved? He always guessed when I was upset and insisted I told him about every insult I heard from his mother. He was there to help and support me in everything.

To my dismay, though, Horace kept things from me.

It hadn't taken long for me to learn that. We had two blissful weeks alone at his estate, Clarendon, and then he informed me that a friend needed his help. Of course, I told him he must go. I'd endured the company of his mother alone, all so he could help his friends.

After that, it was always the same excuse. He had a friend who needed his help. Never did he say which friend or what kind of help he was going to give. Off he would go and I would be left to wait for him. When he returned, he wouldn't tell me about where he had been.

After three years, this had become tiresome.

How could he keep secrets from me? What wasn't he telling me? Did he really have that many friends in need? Was he the only one who could offer help? Was there another reason he remained away?

And then I had a secret of my own. I had my suspicions before he set off on his next mission of mercy, as I had begun to think of his trips. Given that I had lost two babies previously, though, I hesitated to tell him until I was sure this baby would live.

Would it have kept him from leaving? It hurt that I wasn't sure.

My mother-in-law, the dowager Lady Leith, blamed me. She hinted at first and finally outright told me that a good wife knew how to keep her husband by her side. That Horace wouldn't be away so much if he was pleased with our marriage. I tried not to listen to her, since she'd never liked me.

Nothing I did was ever good enough. Every word was criticized. If I made any command, she ordered the exact opposite to be done. To keep the peace, I'd kept my head down, but even that hadn't been the right thing to do.

For the sake of my unborn child, I needed to put my foot down. Clarendon Estate was my home now. I, Celia Leith, wife of Sir Horace, was the mistress. I would not cower before my mother-in-law any longer.

Easier words said than done.

Would it have been easier if Horace were there to back me up? Or would he have asked me to take my time in taking control of the house? Perhaps it would have been better to

To keep my mother-in-law from filling the house with her friends, I invited my own friends. Given that Lady Anne hated scandal, having people provided a shield from the worst of her vitriol. It was a relief to have some respite.

Which was how I came to be sitting at the head of the table. My mother-in-law was on the opposite end, speaking in a low voice to her close friend, Mrs. Reynolds. It wasn't a surprise. Of course, the dowager would turn to the ones who would agree with her.

"Will Sir Horace be joining us soon?" Sir Henry Jonson asked as he lifted his wineglass. He winced as his wife hit his arm. "It has simply been some time since I've seen him."