<3 songs ; gallavich <3

pale blue eyes - the velvet underground

lyrics :
1. ians pov:

a) « sometimes i feel so happy,
sometimes i feel so sad,
sometimes i feel so happy,
but mostly u just make me mad,
baby, u just make me mad »

b) « linger on those pale blue eyes »

c) « skip a life completely,
stuff it in a cup,
she said money is like us in time,
it lies but can't stand up,
down for you is up »

d) « it was good what we did yesterday,
and i'd do it once again,
the fact that you are married only proves you're my best friend
but it's truly, truly a sin »

explaining:

a) « sometimes i feel so happy, sometimes i feel so sad » refers to ians bipolarity but not only that. it also refers to when he got to spend time with mickey in the first 3 seasons and such and the emotions he felt during those times.

for example, he felt happy when mickey came to play video games with him and mandy on the couch in s1 and when mickey finally kissed him in the van in s3, before taking stuff from neds wife home.

in contrast, there were moments were he felt sad, as the scene i won't talk about that happened in 3x6 w svet or when mickey had intercourse w angie, asking her to fück just in front of ian.

« but mostly, u just make me mad » represents the fact that mickey wasn't going to admit he's gay and that angered ian a lot because he wanted an open relationship with him, of course he loves him. ians is clearly mad when mickey agreed to marry svetlana, because he refuses to admit that marrying her would kinda come between his « relationship » with ian. it also makes ian mad that mickey doesn't want to admit that he would be living a lie by marrying someone from the gender he isn't attracted to. that line mostly applies to just before ian goes awol, meaning in s3, cause mickey comes out in s4.

b) « linger on those pale blue eyes »
bitch do i even need to explain this- mickey has blue eyes and with mandys advice, ian tries to see if there's that « look » in his eyes, in s3, to know if mickey likes ian or not. it wasn't very successful doe, with « the fūck are you looking at? » coming from mickey after ian creepily watched over him. (that scene was so funny i can't-)

c) « skip a life completely, stuff it in a cup » that represents ian trying to convince mickey not to marry svet because he loves him and that would, again, change the thing they had going on. by saying « skip a life completely », ians saying that he's gonna be living a lie w svet and not live the life he wants to live, because lemme remind you he's gay and getting married to a woman.

« stuff it in a cup » means to me that even mickey is not going to be pleased in the relationship, that he's still gonna try to hide his real sexuality, hide it in a place where no one can see it. the fact that they say « cup » in the song also makes me think about how mickey is gonna try to ignore the whole situation with alcohol, as he would be really not happy with his way of living.

basically he would try to forget that he's not happy living with a women by « hiding » and drowning himself in cups of alcohol.

« she said money is like us in time, it lies but can't stand up » that line represents the fact that mickey has no problem having sēx with ian (« it lies »)  but he still can't admit to himself and to ian he's gay and that he won't be happy marrying svet (« cant stand up »)

« down for u is up » represents the fact that mickey is just okay with living this double life in secret. he is « down », not showing his true self but he still considers it okay and doesn't mind the secret relationship he has with ian, thinking that the only way he could ever be « up ». in contrast, ian wants him to come out to be in a proud relationship with him.

that's ians definition of being out in contrast w mickeys way of thinking and that's why i can imagine ian saying « down for you is up » because ian doesn't agree w their relationship being a secret. (omg this is really f00king hard to write i'm sorry it's so messy)

d) « it was good what we did yesterday, and i'd do it once again » represents the sëx aspect in ian and mickeys relationship, which is the only main reason mickey was in it first. (the first scene where mickey wasn't stealing from kash n grab or threatening ian was a scene where they had intercourse lmao) well of course we can imagine they both enjoy it a lot since they got serious in s4 and afterwards they got f00king married so it must've been really good if i might say-

« the fact that you're married only proves you're my best friend, but it's truly, truly is a sin » represents how badly ian loved mickey and didn't want him to marry someone else. mickey of course ended up marrying svetlana, afraid to be out because of many reasons, like terry.

ian didn't want a best friend, he wanted a lover, a boyfriend and that's why he says it's a « sin » mickey got married, particularly to a woman, ian knowing mickey is just afraid to admit he's gay to himself and the rest of the world. it's also a sin in a way cause he's choosing someone that hasn't even been close to him (svet) over the boy who loves him so much and that would die for him (ian). ian knows his worth but he's just so hurt that mickey couldn't choose him when he had the « choice » and is really f00king sad that their fragile relationship is breaking down in from of his eyes.

(this was so f00king intense to write holy sh!t i'm sorry if it's weirdly written pls bear w me😔)