Tears on the tiles - Ennoshita x Insecure reader

Tears on the tiles

So this is my first Character x reader. It was suggested by RulerOfTheCourts on my one-shot book but I thought it would be better as it's an individual thing because it's not really a ship.

Few things to note, I tried to make this gender-friendly, so whether you are non-binary, male, female or in between you should be able to read this!

y/n - your name

h/c - hair colour

e/c - eye colour

Sorry if it's not the best, but enjoy!

-J

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

Everything seemed out of proportion. My stomach that seemed to stick out just a little too much, my chubby thighs, my dull e/c eyes. Even the little things, like my teeth or my cheeks. Nothing was perfect.

At least not in my eyes.

A singular tear fell down my cheeks as I looked at myself in the mirror, a look of disgust in my eyes. How does Ennoshita like you? There were so many people out there worthy of him. He was such a nice and caring guy, I couldn't help but judge myself.

"Y/N, are you okay? You've been in the bathroom a long time" his concerned voice called out through the bathroom door.

Whipping my head to the door, more tears started to fall from my eyes at the sound of him just behind that door.

"I-I'm fine" my hoarse voice cracked, giving up at trying to conceal the tears.

"Babe, are you sure?"

"I'M FINE!" I scream, the pressure mounting up, not wanting Ennoshita to see me in this fragile state.

The salty tears started to flow down my face like waterfalls as I stuff my face into the hoodie my boyfriend had given me that night, trying to muffle the sobs.

"Y/N, please let me in," my boyfriend's- calls were muffled, and not just because of the wall.

I felt myself slowly deteriorating, my vision blurred as I fell to the floor in a sobbing heap. The darkest parts of my mind seemed to close in on me, sending myself into a swirling pit of darkness and disappear.

Life seemed pointless. I was a mental wreck, afraid of my body, afraid of being left, afraid my thoughts, afraid of... everything.

"Y/N, please don't leave me" that familiar and angelic voice echoed in the pit of darkness.

"C-Chikara" I sobbing, using his voice to break out of the miserable thoughts.

The light was blinding, shining in my face like a ray from the sun.

"Shh, your okay, calm down" his voice soothed me, sending my writhing body into a calm state that laid sobbing in his arms on the cold stone floor of the bathroom.

"I-I'm sorry, I'm n-not worthy o-of having y-you" I blabbered through my sobs.

His arms that were wrapped around my body stiffened at those words, as he leaned his head into the crook of my neck.

"You may think that, but you are worth everything," he whispered while I continued to sob.

With tears still in my eyes, Ennoshita picked me up, looking down into my e/c orbs with his beautiful chocolate brown eyes.

Everything moved around me in blurs, all I could see was the beautiful face of the guy I got to call my boyfriend.

"Listen" he continued to whisper to me as he sat down on the couch, placing me in his lap, cradling me like a baby "Whatever negative thoughts you have, wash them away. You are so amazing that I should be the one saying how I'm not worthy of having you. You're always trying so hard to impress others that you never have time to look after yourself, so please let me look after you"

A new wave of tears threatened to fall, how could he say those words so easily. Has he even seen me? I'm a mess, my hair is knotted, my eyes are bloodshot, and all because of what?

"I'm not worthy of you, I'm not perfect, I don't have anything good about myself. How do you like someone like this" my shallow sobs filled the room once again as Ennoshita continued to play with my h/c locks.

"Because it doesn't matter whats on the outside, it matters what's on the inside. Even if your looks mattered, you would be the most beautiful/handsome person on this planet. Just because you may not see it, doesn't mean I don't"

I leaned my face into his chest while he slowly rocked me back and forth. His heartbeat was slow and steady, just like he was.

There was a moment of peaceful silence that only my small sobs and hics broke. It was times like these that I really appreciated him and everything that he does, not just for me but for everyone around him.

"Shhh, please stop crying, it hurts to see you like this" his soft and calming voice overpowered my sobs while he continued to cradle my shaking body.

As I leaned into his chest, the faint smell of his cologne filled my senses, making my lids feel heavy.

"I'm sorry" I mumbled, closing my eyes, unable to hold the desperate need for sleep back.

"Don't be, I will love you and any imperfections you think you have"

Those were the last words I heard before falling off into a comfortable and well-needed sleep, all while being cradled in my lover's arms.

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* 

Uhh so no idea if this was good or not! I hope you liked it and any feedback is appreciated <3

stay safe!

-J