Random Writings

Just random writings/thoughts/ideas

Feb 17th 2021 (3:42pm)

I think I found my mate. He was perfect. Perfect in every single way.

God the emotions he could make me think and feel. I've never felt this way. I knew what I wanted and what I wanted was him.

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February 17th (3:54pm - bedtime)

Oh my heart! How did he make me feel this way? How could I love someone so much it makes me want to cry? I'd only felt this kind of love once before in my life time.

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And how my heart screamed out for him to notice me.

Me being me I was definitely to shy to start a conversation with him but damn did I want to.

Did he even notice I existed? Most likely not. He was way out of my league.

Maybe he felt the same but was way to scared to tell me? No, no of course not, I would never be on his radar. Every woman wanted him. Every women desired him. How could they not? I could not find one thing about him that I disliked and in fact the more and more I learned of him I desired him more. He was a flirt of course but I couldn't fault him for it. If I had half his confidence & appeal then I would be such a flirt as well.

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If he knew I was desperately in love with him I wonder how he would feel about it? Could he love me in the way I loved him?

Me being how I am I was way to shy to speak to him and so I watched him from afar hoping and praying he would notice me.

How do you speak to the one you mostly desperately want to but can't seem to find the words when you want and need to?

To want to friends but the need to be more.

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Oh how I wanted him. With every fiber of my being I wanted him.

To touch his face with my hands. To feel his lips against mine. To feel him in my arms with his body so close to mine.

Rawr my want for him was something I'd never experienced. How could someone want and love someone they barely knew?

If only he would speak to me. Break the ice I guess you could say.

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I was hurting. My heart was hurting. I no longer knew what to feel. I tried to numb the pain for so long.

I didn't want to live any longer but I didn't want to die either.

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Every time I looked upon his face he brought me nothing but pure bliss and happiness. How could one love another like this? This was the stuff fairy-tales was made of.

I felt like our souls were so similar yet his was the most purest of souls I've ever encountered. I could not find one single thing about him that I disliked and I was beginning to love him with each passing day.

To love someone from afar and them never know. Now that was the hardest thing to do.

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As I stared into his eyes I could feel his love for me. I longed to kiss his lips but I held back. With his lips being less then an inch away from mine I could practically touch my lips to his. He then did exactly what I was thinking and kissed me. It was the softest of kisses. It made me go weak in the knees and only made me want more from him.

He placed his left hand on my cheek and rubbed his thumb in an up and down motion ever so lightly against it.

❣❣❣❣❣❣❣❣❣❣

February 18th 2021

As she looked at me I could feel her want for me because her eyes said all I needed to know.

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Damn the way he made me feel. The want was way to much I couldn't stand it. If I ever get him alone I don't know if I could control myself and not jump his bones. I lusted him like I have never desired anyone. Everything about him was so attractive and sexy.

I didn't believe in love until him. I thought my cold dead heart was going to stay just that but somehow, oh somehow he has brought my cold dead back to life again and the love, oh the love I feel for him. It is to much it overwhelms my soul.

To look upon his face each day was the highlight of my miserable existence. To know he'd never know. That was difficult. So I shall just keeping watching from afar.

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February 19th 2021

As I lay in my bed all alone I longed for him to be here with me. I wanted him beside me or in my arms.

This bed, this room, this house seemed so empty without him.

I rolled over on my side wishing I had him to cuddle against. I wanted his warm body next to mine so desperately. To feel his skin against my own. To know how I felt to be in his arms.

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Have you ever loved another to the point where it has made you cry? Ya me either.

I loved him with all that I am. I loved him with every fiber of my being.

F*ck did I want him. I wanted him so badly I no longer knew what to feel.

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March 1st 2021

Since this wolf was distracted I took the opportunity to bite into his muzzle which caused him to release my mates tail.

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May 18th 2021 6pm

Oh how I wanted him. I wanted him more then I have ever wanted anyone. I desired him more then I have ever desired anything in my whole existence. He was every thing I have been wanting & he is every thing I have searching for.

I doubt I'm even on his radar he is soooo out of my league. He's pure perfection in every possible way and I am just me. No one special. I wish he'd see me. Like really see. See me for the soul that I am but even if he did why would he want me? He could have anyone, so why would he ever even look in my direction?

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As I stood there not knowing exactly what to do I felt like I was being watched. I look around me in the crowd and didn't see anyone looking at me but I sure felt like there were eyes on me. It made me nervous. My first instinct was was to run but I fought the urge to. As I was pondering my options I felt a light tap on my shoulder which caused me to turn around and face whom dare touch me. As I turned I was greeted by his face. My mate!!! Oh lordy how gorgeously seductive he looked today it caused me to almost go into full panic mode. Why is he here? Like why is he of all people wanting to talk to me?

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June 19th 2021 (11:17pm)

Oh how my soul sang its love song out into the universe in hopes that my true love would hear it. Could they?

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Feb 5th 2022

Oh how I wanted him. The way he made my heart and soul feel. I have only felt this way once before yet this was a different kind of feeling. A different kind of love.  These feelings were deeper, stronger and very so confusing yet exciting. To love is the greatest thing one can do. To give ones self completely and utterly to another. To trust another so much that you dont question the feelings and emotions they stir within you. 

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March 3rd 2022