It's a Long Way Home

PROLOUGE

“Kuya, tawag ka na sa baba. Kakain na daw tayo, maya na ‘yan.” Pinagbuksan ko ng pinto ang younger sister ko na si Alliah.

“Pakisabi mamaya na ako bababa, mabilis na lang rin naman ‘to.” She slightly nodded but I noticed something. She’s a bit sad, I must say, probably because aalis na ako sa bahay.

I’m packing some things, lahat  naman ng dapat kong dadalhin, nilista ko na kahapon kaya mabilis kong naorganize ang lahat at kaunti nalang ang aayusin ko. I didn’t brought that much clothes, pwede ko namang pag-ipunan para makabili ulit. I made sure na dala ko ang mga mahahalagang mga gamit ko: my books, some accessories, my guitar, and my camera.

For sure, I’ll miss the four corners of this room of mine. This room has witnessed so much of my life kasi bihira lang ako lumabas at makipagsocialize. I’m an introvert since gradeschool up until now, and this room has been my safe haven.

Nilibot ko ang mata ko sa paligid. Maraming bagay ang maiiwan ko dito,  mga bonding moments namin ni Alliah, ni Mom and Dad, pati na rin ang aso naming si Krassia, but I need to be overcome this.

     This is just a challenge, Krayver, okay? Better face your fears and time to go out of your comfort zone.

My eyes was fixed at the picture frames displayed in the corner of my bedroom. Most of them were taken from my childhood days, and some were captured recently.

Hinawakan ko ang isang picture. This was taken from the time we were at Batangas. Ang saya pa namin ni Alliah dito, playing in the water all day na parang hindi napapagod. I saw another picture of us smiling while eating balut. Natawa lang ako ng kaunti nang maalalang hindi talaga makain ni Alliah ang sisiw. It’s so good reminiscing such memories.

And all of a sudden, my eyes were glued at my graduation photos in my elementary. Ako ang valedictorian pala dito. Dito na rin nagstart ang pagbrag nila Mommy at Daddy sa akin. They were really proud of me, and that made me strive harder to maintain that spot up until Senior High, and I did maintain it.

Katatapos lang ng graduation namin last month, I was the Salutatorian of our batch, not bad as they would say, but I was totally disappointed at myself. Mahirap lang tanggapin, siguro kasi nagset na rin ako ng mataas na expectation para sa sarili ko, kaya no’ng lumabas na ang results, I was devastated. My parents were okay with it, pero ang laki ng lungkot na naranasan ko.

Bumaba na ako sa kusina para kumain, si Alliah nalang ang natira sa dining area, while sina Dad at Mom ay nag-uusap sa living room.

“Kuya,” Alliah called me while I was busy eating my breakfast. Kita nga sa mukha niya ang lungkot.

“Yes, bunso?”

She just smiled. “Nothing. Mamimiss lang kita nang sobra.” I stared at her blankly for a few seconds and returned the smile she gave me.

“Don’t worry. Hindi naman ako masyadong lalayo. I think this is a good set-up naman, ‘di ba?” She just smiled again and nodded.

Umakyat na ulit ako sa kwarto at nagligpit. Tinulungan na rin ako ni Alliah, since Saturday naman ngayon, meaning, wala silang pasok. Habang nilalagay ang last batch of papers sa isang bag, I remembered what Mom said to me:
                                                                           

“I really do think that you should try to live independently this time, don’t you think, anak?” Mom asked the moment she entered my room two weeks after my graduation.

“What do you mean, mom?” I asked,  dumbfounded. Napahinto ako sa pagbasa ng libto at nakinig sa kanya.

“Nakapag-usap na kami ni Daddy mo, and he agreed with my suggestion. Maybe it’s time para itry mong mamuhay nang mag-isa. Kakayanin mo naman, ‘di ba anak?”

Silence enveloped my room. Hindi ko alam ang isasagot ko. Umupo siya sa tabi ng kama ko at bumuntong hininga.

“Anak, listen,” she said, holding my hand. “You’ll do good. I know that you’re a smart man, and you’re now a grown-up. Soon, you’ll start making big decisions for yourself, and you need to stand up one your own feet. Mahirap, of course, because you were used to do things in here, but there’s a bigger world outside, at dapat mo ‘yong harapin.”

I just stared on mid-air, still blank on what to say, still glued on my spot.

“Hinanapan ka na namin ng place for you to stay. By next next month, you’ll be preparing yourself for college admission, kaya pinrepare na namin lahat for you. Trust the process anak, okay? You’ll be fine.”

Hearing all of these things from Mom, I couldn’t help but to overthink on some random things, but just like what she said, kakayanin ko.

                                                                         Nilagay na namin ang mga dala ko sa likod ng sasakyan ni Dad, sabi niya daw ay ihahatid nila ako. Pagkatapos naming ilagay lahat, sumakay na rin kami.

It nearly took us three hours due to traffic before arriving at the place I’ll be staying. Malapit lang siya sa UP-Diliman, the school where I’ll be studying, for I’ll be taking a Medicine course. I belong to a family of doctors. My lolo and lola in my father’s  side were both pediatricians, and my Mom and Dad, including most of my titos and titas in both sides are also doctors in different fields, which makes me also in the expectation of taking up Medicine.

Kami nalang ni Dad ang umakyat at nagtulungang buhatin ang mga gamit ko papunta sa magiging kwarto ko.

I roamed the entire place. It was spacious, tingin ko nga’y magkakasya ang apat na tao dito. There’s a living room, the kitchen in the corner, a small dining area, and two bedrooms with the comfort room at the center.

Dad just gave me instructions and messed my hair, a thing he usually do, before leaving. Hindi na muna ako nagligpit, bukas nalang siguro. I am mentally exhausted from continuously reviewing for the test. I need to get some sleep. Nagshower ako nang mabilis at nagpalit ng damit para makapaghanda na sa pagtulog.

“Can I last long in here? Makakaya ko bang tumira nang mag-isa?” tanong ko sa sarili ko nang paulit-ulit. I often overthink about these things, even before ako dumating dito.

“Argh. Bahala na,” sabi ko habang kinakamot ang ulo. 

     I can’t let them down.

Ayoko sila madisappoint, so I’ll do all things, just to make them proud of me.

I am still thinking a lot of things.

     What do I need to expect from living by myself? Leaving home may be one of the toughest decisions I made, kasi napalayo ako sa pamilya ko, and it was the only place I felt truly comfortable.

I really don’t know what’s gonna happen tomorrow, or even in the next couple of days, but I know,

I’ll do things surely.

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Disclaimer:

     All names, things, and events that will be seen in the next chapters are works of fiction and are products of the author’s imagination. Any resemblance to true names, things, or events may be purely coincidental.

Author’s Note:

     This is a first story of mine, ladies and gentlemen. Critisisms and feedbacks are very much welcome. I wanna say thank in advance for reading this story, and just stay tune for the next chapters.

Until the next chapter brave souls,
Kyoshi
                                                                           

It’s A Long Way Home
@KyoshiLaFuerte

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