imperfect romance (la la x chris evans)

A new begining

it was a dark and stormy night. la la just got done attempting suicide. surprise surprise, it didn't work.

"im such a failure!!!!" she groaned loudly.

dipsy walked in from hearin"g her sounds.

"shut the fuck up I am trying to watch cake boss on po's television tummy, you dumb useless fucking whore"

"bruuh" she cried. " i aint even lost my virginity yet how im gonna be a whore, make it make sense!!!"

"bitch idgaf if you been deflowered or nah, you a hoe, cant trust no female these dayz."

"purrrr" said po from the living room.

"you may not have gotten a ding dong in yo arbys sandwhich but you sure as well worn down that dildo." tinky winky laughed as they came out of the little girls room. "Nubby mfer. smh"

" n e wayz we goin to the nickelodeon theme park in mall of america bye stank ass hoe"

Po yelledn walking out the door, dipsy and tinky winky following close behind.

Lala obvi couldn't go because I was an undocumented immagrent and didn't want ICE all up her ass while she tryna get her groove on on the spongebob ride. She decided if she was alone she would try to end her shit again, so she strolled over to her neighbor Lois' house.

"Yuh whats up mtv welcome to my crib" Lois garggled upon lala's entry. "Thank god my stank ass husband peter aint here so we can have some girl talk yaaasssss."

sadly, Lois' rank ass pussy made a wave of nausea smack Lala in the facial area,

chunks began to rise from her tele tummy.

"Oooo lawdy i think im about to blow chunks!!"

Lala screamed right as the half digested pills streamed from her open mouth. <3

A pile of half disintegrated walgreens brand tylenol laid on the floor like a jackson pollock work of art.

"yaaasss pills"

Lois giggled, scarffing them down hungrily, storing half in her cheeks for stewie. Such a good mother. lala thot to herself.

suddenly a jacked asf man walked through the door.

"shiiiiii who art thou?!?!?"

"ayyy thats my half cousin chris jamal evans!!!" lois cheered with GLEE.

her virginia was excited by the view. tall, blonde, has 2 eyes and 2 ears. Just her type. Not many guys like that out there these days. with them eye removal surgeries bein so popular now n dayz. Mr. Jamal evans looked lala up and down, then left and right, and finally through her, at an X-axis, 4th dimension type shit, yknow?

Lala knew what ari granda was talking about when she said "yuh" Lyrics never hit so hard.

"Hi im chris jamal evans but you can just call me C Jamal, so you dont confuse me with donald jamal down the street."

He said with a sweet smirk, it was then that lala noticed he still had his baby teeth.

wow i just love an authentic man, you know just what yo getting with them baby teef

Lois ran off to have the wet shits, leaving them alone together, staring into eachother's eye balls.