Snake Tales

Pizza and Fans

“Hey guys. It’s you know who! Snake! So, it’s been over about a week since my last vlog, but I just want to tell you all that I’m fine. I know I told you I wasn’t safe last week. Hey! Look at me, I’m fine. Last week was just a false alarm. No more worry mail from any of you asking if I’m alive. Most of those broke my heart! Please guys, I was just swimming in a pool of tears ‘cause of emails from you guys. I’m fine. Ugh, I have to cut this video short, but I’ll be back! Don’t forget to subscribe to my YouTube channel and follow me at Snake Tales For Real on Tumblr. See you all next week!”
            I press the record button on the camera and stop filming. This is a usual task for me since I’ve started to get more fans. 5,000 subscribers on YouTube and about 600 followers on my Tumblr account. Maybe I should start a Twitter and a Facebook page. I shake the idea odd for now and plug the camera’s usb cord into my laptop’s usb port. Time for me to upload the videos, after I edit, of course.

            My name is Austin Rogers, but my fans and friends call me Snake. Yes, I said fans first because I have two friends, so be quiet about my priorities. At the moment, I live in beautiful Detroit, Michigan. This is my last day here after I upload this damn video. Hey, I’m only leaving because the Lab Rats are on my tail.

            I spin around in my chair, leaving my camera and laptop on the desk. The pizza dude should be here any minute.

            As if my thoughts were heard, there’s a knock on my door. My hotel door anyways. As I bend down and grab my wallet off the table, the guy knocks again. “I’m coming! Calm down!”

            I unlock that oh so, protective, broken deadbolt lock and open the door. There stands the most beautiful thing in the world: Pizza Hut pizza. Oh yeah, there’s a dude holding it. I look at the kid, pulling out a twenty dollar bill, and I notice he’s staring at me, wide eyed.

            “Dude, what’s wrong? You look like you saw a unicorn or Jennifer Lawrence or something.”

            “You’re… you’re Snake!”

            Well shit, there goes that. I’ll be leaving sooner than I thought. I smile and nod at the kid, taking my pizza and handing him the money. “Yeah, it’s me, Snake. Don’t tell your friends that I’m here. I’m leaving today.” Before he can say more, I close the door.

            I place the beautiful pizza on the table and open the box. I’ve been waiting all day for this, so to congratulate myself for the video, I grab a slice of my pizza. It’s my favorite! It has cheese, peperoni, and sausage. Oh, and pineapple! Pineapple is great on pizza.       

            I have about two hours until the video is ready to edit, then about another five hours for it to actually upload to YouTube. Might as well update Tumblr.

            I’ve told my fans only my nickname, Snake, and I’ve told them nothing else. What they don’t know is that I’m supposed to be a freshman, but I don’t go to school. I take online classes. At the moment, I’m fifteen, but I’ll be sixteen in like, eight months. If there’s anything else about me, besides my natural good looks, I might let them find out later.

            I take a bite from my third piece of pizza, put it down, and then stand up. I need to run to a store and get some things. I had seen a nearby gas station, so I might as well go there.

            I close the pizza box, (don’t want anyone touching my dinner) grab my room key, and leave. It’s mid-April, so it’s kind of cool, but nice enough.

            I tug my beanie down a bit tighter on my head. I fucking love my beanie.

            As I walk to the gas station, I get a couple awed looks. Seems like I’m getting more and more famous each day.