Fights, Camera, Action

Chapter Thirteen

As Dean stirred to life, the first thing he noticed was that it was dark outside, meaning his nap had been longer than intended. The second, and more important, thing he noticed was that there was a warmth to his right in the bed. It was only then that he remembered having invited Novak over, and he calmed slightly, turning to glance over at him. He was met with Novak leaning against the pillows, meeting his eyes where he had been watching him instantly. He didn't seem embarrassed at being caught; in fact, he smiled softly.

"Hey," he said quietly, and Dean hated how his heart jumped. They were fucking, not dating. And didn't he still hate him?

...didn't he?

He shook himself out of his reverie to give Novak an answering smile, as half-hearted as it clearly was. Laying back against the pillows, Dean stared at the ceiling and hated how he couldn't stop himself from thinking of Jess, of how badly he missed her. Swearing, he sat up and rubbed his eyes, trying to keep the tears that had already begun at bay. He felt an arm wrap around his shaking shoulders and leaned into the touch, wanting anything else to think about at that moment.

Opening his eyes, he turned his head over his shoulder to see Castiel's worried eyes on him. Sighing, he rubbed at his face with his hands again. Finally, Castiel broke his silence, all the while rubbing small circles on Dean's shoulder.

"Is there anything I can do?" He asked, and Dean let a sob rip from his chest at the words. Turning fully, he let himself be crushed into a hug as he hid his face in Cas's neck. God, he felt like he was dying. He almost couldn't help but wish that he was.

Getting his tears under control slightly, he sat up a bit off of Castiel's chest, his face not three inches from Cas's own. Taking a shaky breath, he held onto Cas's face.

"Kiss me, please," he managed to whisper out. "Please."

Before he could say another word, one of Cas's hands came up to cup Dean's face gently as he obliged him. He leaned back into the pillows, letting Dean lean on his slightly reclined chest as he slotted their lips together carefully. If he felt or heard the shaky breath of relief that Dean let out, he didn't indicate it, continuing to kiss Dean as he brought his other hand up to his face as well.

Dean was holding onto Cas like he would die if he let go, kissing him even as tears rolled down his face. He felt Cas move his thumbs periodically to wipe his tears away as he kissed him, and the way that he was practically cradling Dean's shaking form. Finally, Dean came up for air to see that Cas's own eyes were also red-rimmed. A small huff of empty laughter found its way out of his chest as he wiped the tears off of Cas's face.

"We really are a mess, aren't we?" He whispered, and Cas just gave him a small nod, moving his right hand to cup Dean's cheek. Dean almost couldn't bear the tender look in his eyes as he leaned into the touch. As much as they had claimed to hate each other in the past, they seemed to work just fine when they needed to.

With a sigh, Dean wrapped himself around Cas and rested his head on his shoulder again. Cas said nothing about this, moving his arms to hold Dean and rub small circles into his back. They sat that way in silence for hours, until the sunlight was creeping into the room and the birds began singing. It was at this point that Cas shifted, Dean immediately rolling off of him to let him up. Cas reached for his phone and checked the time with a sour expression. He stood and stretched, turning to look at Dean where he still sat.

"I'm gonna make breakfast, if that's okay," he said, receiving a nod of approval from Dean. Dean's heart jumped again. God, he almost wanted to strangle himself for having these complicated emotions at the worst time known to man. Before he had processed that, Cas was already out of the room and into the kitchen.