It wasn't supposed to happen // MHA Bakugo

35. Here you are!

"Here you are!"

Shit. I didn't get enough time. I let my emotions take over instead of interrogating him.

She smiles at me and I suddenly feel all the pain of his words, of the realisation that he is voluntarily in this relationship based on inhibiting your feelings, lifted. I know it's her. I could never feel this numb otherwise.

"Please don't do this." I ask as she has now joined us.

"You seemed upset. I was just trying to help." She smiles.

"I'm fine, I can cope with my emotions. That's what makes me human."

"You asked for it."

A burst of anguish resurfaces to the point that I need to hold my chest and I feel myself shaking. Why does it feel worse? All this anxiety is making my heart race. I look up at her. She's made it way worse than it was and she's enjoying it.

"Are you okay?" Hawks asks, wrapping his arm around my waist, worry all over his face.

"Yes." I smile, trying to reassure him. "Let's go back in."

We return inside, leaving them on the terrace.

The further away we go, the less I feel her effect.

"Are you sure you're okay? You're sweating."

"Feeling better now. She did this."

"She probably didn't like the fact that you were with her boyfriend."

"There's something not right, I know it."

"I agree. I could sense that she was definitely acting. I could feel it in my feathers.

"Then she knows you're onto her. There's more to her quirk than pacifier."

"Let's just act casual. I don't think we'll be able to do anything else tonight."

"You're right."

"Stay close to me though."

"Are you really worried or do you just want me around?" I ask teasingly, as I now feel much better.

"Can't it be both?" He's funny.

We spend the rest of the evening together and I have recovered from my close panic attack as we have been avoiding them all evening.

We spoke to Kiri who explained that him and Bakugou have now got their own agency and are on a case of technology firm heist. Equipment is being stolen but none of the police scientists can work out what the thieves are trying to make. All they know is that four laboratories have been hit in similar circumstances across the island.

After a few words and a tight squeeze, we excuse ourselves at the end of the evening.

In the car, I get lost in my thoughts. I am more worried than ever for him.

If she's linked to Le Chiffre, it means he was targeted because of me and I feel awful.

She has her quirk dug deep in his mind and there is nothing I can do to reason with him.

"Mikki."

"Sorry. What?!?"

"We're here." I didn't even realise we got back to my place.

"Thanks." I grab my bag and am about to exit.

"Do you want me to come up?" Oh... what do I say?

"I... maybe..."

"I don't imply.... It's fine. I'll let you get some rest."

"Hawks... I... sorry I just..."

"It's okay." He puts his hand on mine. "Don't worry. I can tell Bakugou is on your mind." I hope he's not jealous.

"He's a friend." I say trying to reassure him.

"He was much more and you can't fight old feelings." He adds understandingly.

"That's what they are. Old feelings. He's a friend and Le Chiffre might be after him because of me."

"True but he's a grown man and a hero himself. We know we can be targeted for any reason. We know what we sign up for. Don't feel guilty okay?"

"Easier said than done."

Squeezing my hand, his thumb rubs over it and he leans over to kiss my cheek but I turn my head and offer my lips. I don't know why. Am I trying to prove something? Am I trying to convince him my feelings for Bakugou are old or am I trying to convince myself?

His hand glides along my jaw and grabbing my nape, he pulls me closer in our delicious kiss.

There's no denying that he makes me feel better.

Leaning his forehead against mine, he sighs.

"What is it?" I ask curiously.

"You."

"What have I done?"

He shakes his head sighing again, then chuckles.

"You make me feel... good." I feel relieved.

"You make me feel good too. Why the sigh then?"

"I don't want to let you go."

"Do you want to come up?"

As he stares at me, somehow see struggle in his eyes.

"I don't. I mean I do but I shouldn't." I'm surprised, especially after that kiss.

"You can. I changed my mind. Please come up." I say, placing my hand on his chest, sliding my fingers in the small gap of his open collar.

I'm tired but I could do with the distraction.

"I'm not sure I just want to have... fun anymore." Shit. He looks at me with his soft eyes and I hear what he's saying. I don't know how to react. "I'm starting to really care about you. When she used her quirk on you, I had a ball in my stomach and I was ready to smash her head to the ground. After that, having you close to me, I felt different."

"Different how?"

"Like I wanted to introduce you as my better half." He blushes.

"Oh."

"I just feel like I've found my equal. I'm sorry. I know we agreed. So maybe we should take a step back and just stick with being partners for now."

I am stunned. I wasn't expecting him to drop this on me, especially not tonight.

"If that's what you want."

He strokes my cheek and kisses the palm of my hand. I feel like I should say something but I am lost for words.

After getting out of his car, I enter my building and, once I pass the door, he leaves.

Going up the elevator, I'm still dumbfounded and tired too.

I need to focus on the raid not on my ex boyfriend's new brainwashing girlfriend. Not on him and how his words cut me so deeply. Not on Hawks telling me he has feelings for me.

God why is this so difficult?

Maybe I should not have come here.

Maybe I should have let Le Chiffre go...

No.

Never.

Just focus on the goal Mikki.