Baboon Loves Fungus

the Awakening of the Darkness within Fungus

Fungus. My new name. I used to be a handsome boy that everyone fell head over heels for. The one that wears shorts during the "bitterly cold," winter. I grew up in Canada. 

How did a brilliant boy who thought woodpeckers lived in Canada AND Australia come to being called Fungus?

One time, somebody had confessed their undying love for me. Alas, I refused them without a second thought. 

He was a wizitch. (So as not to be discriminatory.) I remember thinking, Well that spell backfired... after which I proceeded to conduct my day as normal. It took me a while to come home, look at my mirror, and see a large fungus growing on my nose. 

It hasn't stopped growing. And there isn't a cure. I've visited many types of wizitchs;  sorcerers, potioneers, runecasters, and many, many more. There isn't a maegiq that can cure me without my nose getting destroyed. My head is on the verge of falling off. Why don't I cut the fungus off? It's a curse, and this particular curse digs it's roots deep into my nose. If I cut it off, it grows back twice it's size. The only way to eradicate it, is by chopping my entire nose off. 

That's why I'm currently sitting in accident and emergency, twaddaling my fingers anxiously. My handsome, curly brown hair sits at the top of my head, the same as ever. I may look nose-less after this, but at least I wouldn't be called Fungus.

Deep breaths.

----

It's done. The fungus is gone. Now people won't bully me anymore! But there is definetly one thing that I crave, that has been imprinted into my mind ever since the curse had started. REVENGE. Stealing maegiq is the best vengeful option.

I grab my hospital-lunch-fork, abrubtly stand up and start running off to get a slice of my revenge. 

"Mr Gelato, I think over-exposure to a cursed fungus and it being alarmingly close to your nostrils has meddled with your mind and we think you might have become slightly pyscopathic... Mr Gelato? Fungus?" A doctor mumbles, not looking up from his overloaded clipborad. 

Dr. Mumbles looks up. He sees the roof. He looks down, and realises Gelato is gone. "I'm not suprised," Dr. Mumbles mumbles.

----

The wizitch's apartment! I finally reach it! I shove all my other thoughts to the side. REVENGE.

I kick the door to the apartment open. The wizitch is passed out on the couch, clutching a bowl of doritos in his hands. Long, manicured, pink fingernails are attached to his hands. I can't tell if they're real or not. They look dangerous. His long black hair is braided and it lies on his shoulder. He looks quite pretty. He looks alive. 

I am going to change that

I've watched enough movies, and I've read enough books. I put the wizitch's face into my hands and I start sucking on his nose, the place where he cursed me. His maegiq starts swirling out, as expected. I stop sucking on his nose, and I start sucking on the maegiq. Delicous. Warm. MAEGIQ. 

I am a non-maegiq-er. The process of stealing maegiq should be a painful one. It's a miracle he hasn't woken up yet. 

"AIH AIH AIH NUU HERI!!!" He cusses in Maegiqe. He grips my hand, but I don't stop sucking on the maegiq. He starts sucking on some maegiq, and I lean in for his nose, but he starts grappling my face. I cry out in agony as he starts slashing my face.

"ARJKKKKKKK," he chants, and I know I'm done for. I punch his hands away, and suck on his nose. He goes very still. I manage to suck on the remaining maegiq, that floats away from him. I sigh in relief, but my relief is short-lived, because the curse starts taking over. The wizitch is deadnow, I'm sure.

I clutch my head as the maegiq starts corrupting. ARJKKKKKKK is a powerful curse. The corrupted maegiq takes hold of my body. ARJKKKKKKK only takes over once the original host has died. A wizitch can't survive without maegiq. This one was a whopper. My skin starts becoming this gray-blue-green colour, and I feel... different. I scream out in pain as my body starts elongating, into a hideous form, I am sure.

I gather the courage to look in the mirror. First I must locate a bathroom. Once I locate a bathroom, I look in the mirror. I am Voldemort. Voldemort is I.

A/N- So fungus's surname is Gelato, and he just transfromed into Voldemort. Baboon doesn't come it yet, and Maegiq is KINDA like magic. Maegiqe is the maegiqul language. And ARJKKKKKKK is a VERY powerful curse. NUU HERI AIH are swearwords in the maegiqul language, Maegiq.

Hope you enjoyed reading! 

-Oriana Silver Scales