My life

day 156

As i looked up from the ground of which i had been sat on , stood a tall dark figure . They just seemed to have been looking over to the other cells across the room but they were now fixing their glare on me .It was quite awkward , they didnt seem to be talking yet they started to point over in the direction of the exit door .I didnt know what they were trying to hint at , suddenly their hand pointed at me , then the door again. They must want me to go through the door. Slowly, i got up from the ground and walked towards the door . But when i turned around to see why the figure wanted me to go there, it was gone . The tall mysterious figure that had been standing there for god knows how long , has somehow disapeared into thin-air. But who was it? i couldnt make out the persons face or body , to be honest i dont even know if that thing was human , i mean it disapeared out of no-were. Wait...it wanted me to go to the door , but why ?Im here now and its not even there anymore . Why did it leave? As the thoughts on that figure remain in my head , i decided that i should continue through the door and see whats on the outside of the building that i was in, As i slowly made my way outside , i saw that i was in a city , i felt a cold rush of air throughout my entire body .hmmm..I remember seeing a jacket on the floor in the building ,maybe that can keep me warm for awhile until i can find someone to help me . But as i turned around to go back inside the entire building was gone. W-what...B-but how ?it was just there a minute ago. Were even am i... As i looked up all i saw was a white room . But i swear i was outside a minute ago.. what is happening to me . "Hey... you need to calm down sir, your halucanating again arent you". " let me guess you didnt take your meds" .As i opened my eyes i saw the room i had been in since i was 12 , ah yes the phyc ward . Its a long story on why im here but its been 3 years since then so ive forgotten most of my past . The way i ended up here is really the only thing i remember if im honest . "sir..i have some news for you" " your getting released in a week but you will be getting monitored by a staff member to make sure your little incident doesnt happen again"W-wait...I.im gonna be able to leave this place f-for good. M-make friends , get a job , a house . I'll be free. Finally ."Just one last thing sir , your still gonna have to take your meds every day until your hallucinations stop happening okay , good , well ill be off now , have a good rest of your day , a nurse will be in soon to give you some meds " Ugh my meds taste awful , yet i still have to take them , i mean....they are the reason im in here... Well , looks like its time to get some sleep that hallucination has got me all worn out ....

Its a new day , the nurse has already made sure ive taken my meds .

The room im in is quite boring , but i have to make use of it until im dispatched in a week. I have my bed , a few books , a diary and pen , and some clothes . not much but it has to do . i mean ive put up with it for 3 years so im used to not having anything else . My favourite book is the 'devils breath' . its a good story. the plot is amazing , ive read it about over 20 times now . its a way to pass the time . But i was thinking of starting a new book . Should i read 'harry potter and the chamber of secrets' or should i read ' hunter x hunter' . hmmmm ill decide on which one later but for now i need to eat .

Its currently 2:45pm , ive eaten , i think i should read 'hunter x hunter'. I read the back and it sounds pretty interesting . Its an anime i think , when i get released i might watch it . I mean i should plan what im going to do when i get out of this place , I mean..afterall i need to get a job first until i can do anything else . W-wait , I think im gonna....

Were am i ? Oh no.... wait but i thought i had the pills ? Well i might as well look around whilst i still can.

It looks like im in a hospital...but all the lights are off exept the one down that hallway near the end....Ive seen movies about this sort of stuff before and it never ends well . But i mean i wont die from it as its only a hallucination after all,so it shouldnt hurt to go to the light ? Ive started walking...the light is starting to flicker...maybe i can find someone , maybe a staff member to guide me out of this place. Im now under the light....its stopped flickering but im gonna guess that its gonna start flickering again soon when i walk down the corridor. Maybe i can go inside that door next to me instead... there is a sign above it, it reads ' main office ' . So if im correct there should be someone on their night shift inside here. If not then this is all apart of the hallucination .And when i turn around after i open the door then there should be something behind me if im correct . Otherwise this is just a normal hospital and there is nothing else to it .

i feel like im gonna be sick!? i can smell something...the smell of rot.... the smell of...s-steak..h-huh but....

"sir wake up"

"you had another hallucination"

" if them pills arent working then we are gonna have to keep you in for another 4-8 weeks so we can put you on a higher dose"

w-wait...but i thought i was on the 3rd highest dose. i mean after awhile they stop working but if they are gonna put me on anything higher than 3 then i better be despatched in a week or im not taking them pills. They could end up giving me a heart attack if they give me them too quickly they could atleast give me small doses at a time . I mean they havent even give me them yet so i better not get myself worked up otherwise they might put me to sleep for awhile until i can calm down , i hate needles , mainly as much as i hate being stuck in this cell .

They hurt like hell , so ive had to keep my temper to a minimum to avoid getting them . Some people here call it ' booty juice' which is practically describing were they stick the needle to put you to sleep . I dont see why they cant just stick it in your arm and get it over with.... oh well . it is what it is i guess. There is some food on a tray near the bottom of my door that the nurse must of brought me . I bet they out that 2nd tier dose of pills into it to make me take it . It doesnt smell off? Im just overthinking it.... they would warn me first.

Wouldnt they? I mean atleast i think they would... yet they would want to trick me into eating them... oh well i mean i am quite hungry afterall . And them hallucinations are starting to tire me out . So lets eat and then read the start of the ' hunter x hunter' manga .

Then ill maybe get some rest . Or i could just stay up all night and read.... no . i need to get some sleep. well....goodnight.