MY TEARS RICOCHET 𛲕 STRANGER THINGS

21. Cowboy Boots

CHAPTER 21: Cowboy Boots

Matilda, you talk of the pain like it's all alright
But I know that a piece of you is dead inside.
— Matilda, Harry Styles

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* 　　 *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

"LET'S TALK ABOUT FERN," WAS THE FIRST QUESTION that Miss Kelley posed to Daphne, folding her hands in her lap as she watched her carefully. "I know you said in our earlier sessions that you were still struggling to get over her death. How are you feeling now?"

"About the same, I guess," replied Daphne, fidgeting with the hem of her shirt.

"Are you still having nightmares?"

She had been having nightmares. She saw Fern every night when she closed her eyes. Saw the demogorgon ripping apart everyone she had ever cared about. And when she woke up, she could still hear their screams.

"Not really," she bit her tongue and lied through her teeth. 

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* 　　 *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

September 3rd, 1984: Hawkins High

The crisp September air ruffled Daphne's hair as she lounged against the hood of Meera's car, brushing her nails with a pretty peach shade of nail polish. Beside her, Meera was fussing over a pile of music sheets, preparing her audition piece for a solo in this year's orchestra recital.

"It's strange," Daphne was saying. "I keep expecting Fern to roll up and start complaining about being back at school for another year. It's like she's here but not at the same time."

"I know," agreed Meera. "I don't even want to know what she would say if she were here to see me stressing over this audition."

"She'd probably make some joke about the kind of people who play the harp."

"Virgins, nuns and guys who want to have sex with their moms," prompted Meera, counting them off on her fingers. "God, it really is like she's still here."

"Miss Kelley said it will feel like that for a while," replied Daphne. "Especially during important milestones — like prom, birthdays, first day back at school. Those days will be harder. We just have to get through it, somehow."

Daphne had started seeing Miss Kelley over the summer break after her breakdown had landed her in hospital. The doctors had given her the choice to either enrol in rehab or start seeing a therapist, so naturally, Daphne had chosen the latter option, albeit reluctantly.

And she was trying, really, she was trying. She wanted to get better. But every time she thought things were getting easier, she would suffer from another nightmare, a panic attack, or a bout of PTSD and she would spiral right back to where she started.

She worried that the reason she wasn't getting any better was because she couldn't quite bring herself to open up to the guidance counsellor. Miss Kelley was nice, but there was something... off, about her. Daphne couldn't quite find it in herself to trust her. So she gave her vague answers and fake smiles and tried to get better all on her own as she'd always been taught to do.

The sound of crunching gravel and an engine violently revving interrupted Daphne from her reverie. The cheerleader frowned, turning towards the source of the noise, only to see a blue Camaro speeding into the parking lot like it was late for the Grand Prix. She jumped off the hood of Meera's car to get a better look, narrowly missing the spray of gravel that the Camaro left in its wake.